A CHANGE OF HEART
by markab
Summary: my take on the current storyline...where a change of heart can also be just as heartbreaking...as he starts to move on afresh with his new bloke...features Aaron Livesy and Callum James
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Emmerdale or it's characters, they belong to ITV

A/N: Hi, this story will only run a few chapters or so...but it is MY take on the current storyline...Jackson may of had a change of heart here...but it doesn't necessarily mean a happy ever after...because I've been OUT OF THE LOOP for a while i'm not sure if this has already been covered, if it has I'm sorry...let me know what you think...and if you DO want more of this one...PS, chapter 10 is up for my other story. MARK xx

Hazel couldn't do it, she couldn't kill her own son...her heart was breaking as Jackson cried in panic...Mum was backing out now...Mum was letting him down now...

But Aaron sat there...sat perched on the bed...he couldn't see nowt...not through those teary eyes...he just looked toward his desparate boyfriend...a man who just wanted to put an end to his sorry life.

Hazel clutched THE DRINK...it was shaking in her hand as she tried to control her tears...SHE couldn't do this...she couldn't...Aaron stared at Jackson one last time before he turned away taking in those deep breaths...it was UP to him...it was HE who needed to fullfill Jackson's death wish.

Aaron leant over and took the DRINK from Hazel then he stood and sat up closer to Jackson gently clasping hold the back of his head...the death drink now shaking in his own hand...Aaron tried to keep the sobs to a minimum...but it was SO hard...screwing up his sad face he blurted out, " YOU CHANGED MY LIFE..."

Jackson set his eyes onto the drink...then found himself locked to Aaron's lips...a final kiss that he hoped would linger long enough to comfort him...settle his fears...because he was shitting himself now...this was THE END...THIS WAS CURTAIN DOWN ON HIS LIFE.

Jackson stared into Aaron's desparate eyes, "PLE...PLEASE DON'T FORGET ME...", Aaron shook his head as he heard Hazels' crying intensify...and she was shaking, her back turned on them where she sat on the opposite side of the bed.

Aaron then brought the drink up to Jackson's lips...the straw near his mouth...Aaron pulled Jackson's head forward so he could consume the lethal cocktail...but Jackson pulled back...he forced his head back down to the pillow shaking his head in desolute dispair, " I CAN'T DO IT...I CAN'T DO IT..." he said over and over again...

Aaron's eyes widened as he slowly stood and backed away...all he could do at first was stare at him, not quite believing what Jackson was saying...he had been so adament about it...he wanted to die...he wanted out and he was gonna do it...how could he just change his mind...surely he must've known how upsetting this was...how hard to even have to hold the lethal cocktail...after feeling nothing for a few seconds, because of the shock...he was starting to feel anger..." You bastard..." he whispered, "you fucking arsehole..." the tears sprang from his eyes again, " HOW CAN YOU DO THIS...HOW CAN YOU CHANGE YOUR FUCKING MIND!", till that instant Hazel was silent...she was in shock...did she hear correctly...had her son changed her mind...she slowly turned her head toward him...her face streaming with tears...

"J..Jackson..." she whispered...and then she jumped out her skin as Aaron furiously chucked the death drink to the wall, she stood and grasped him as he went to bolt out the door, "AARON...", Aaron shook her off and stormed out...

Hazel turned and saw Jackson stare at the wall...the lethal cocktail streaming down the wallpaper...the plastic beaker on it's side where it had landed...she then ran to her son's side and grasped his head in her arms...

Aaron ran...he ran from Dale view...and ran toward Smithy where Paddy was coming out and saw the young lad upset, " AARON...", Paddy went to grasp him, but Aaon wriggled out of his grasp, "AARON...!"

The lad then ran towards main street to see Chas heading his way, " Aaron love...", on sighting her he instantly changed direction...not noticing Adam had homed in on what was going off, " AARON MATE!", Aaron bolted through the churchyard and out toward the field...and Adam gave chase calling after him.

Chas hurried up to Paddy demanding to know what was going on...Paddy waved his hands up in the air, as both of them headed towards Dale view...THEY were going to get to the bottom of this...Aaron had been acting strange for days...and now he seemed to off gone right off the rails...Aaron running like THAT ment something MAJOR had happened to him.

Chas banged on the door to Dale View, and Hazel eventually answered it, both pushed their way inside, " WAIT...YOU CAN'T JUST...!" began Hazel sharply, Chas was nodded her head and POINTING the finger at her, " WHAT'S going on...WHY is MY SON so upset!", Paddy had already sighted the wall, and the beaker on the floor, " What's going on Hazel...has Aaron lashed out...", Jackson's eyes were closed...but he could hear what was going on, " Look Hazel we need to know what's going off...I'm sorry we've barged in while Jackson's having his afternoon kip..."

Jackson opened his eyes, and turned his head toward Paddy, " I'm not asleep...it's okay...is Aaron okay..." he asked, there was some deep concern in the tone of his voice, Chas came forward, " NO he's NOT...HAVE you two fallen out AGAIN!", Jackson closed his eyes, " we...I...", Hazel quickly came forward, " Look...MY Jackson is just not up to this at the moment...he needs...", Jackson snapped his eyes open, " MUM!...just shut it...I need to explain...", Hazel was shaking her head, " No you don't...NO Jackson..."

Jackson nodded his head, " I do...I REALLY do...", Paddy was looking between Jackson and his Mum...he could sense something was going on, and Aaron had been a big part of it, "Wait is this something...got to do with Aaron's moods...because he's been acting really wierd of late...really out of character...", Jackson shook his head at him from where he laid on his bed, "Yeah...big time...Paddy...I AM SO SORRY...", Chas came to Paddy's side, " Look...just spit it out...WHAT'S this all about Jackson", Jackson could see the dread in Hazel's eyes...the shame possibly..." MUM...get the lap top...", Hazel came foward and cupped his face, " IT'S NOT their business..."

"It is...It's AARON'S business...and it's theirs...JUST get the laptop...", slowly Hazel solemnly disppeared up the stairs, as Jackson looked up to Paddy and Chas, " I better explain...BUT...please DON'T be mad at Aaron..."

Aaron was rocking as he hugged his knees where he sat in the field, Adam had caught up with him and was trying to get through to him, " Aaron PLEASE...tell me mate...tell me...", Aaron stared at his best friend, the words wouldn't escape his mouth...he seemed to of lost his voice, as the choking emotion caught in his throat silenced him, " Aaron please...somethings wrong mate...just tell me...", Aaron forced himself to stand, " I...I...nearly killed Jackson...I NEARLY KILLED JACKSON!"

Chas and Paddy were in shock, Jackson had explained to them about what he had planned...what he had Hazel and Aaron do to him...Jackson just wanted it all out in the open, there was just no point at all hiding it...not now.

Chas tried to fatham out what Jackson ment...Jackson said he WANTED to die...Paddy however was abit quicker off the mark, and was clearly angry, " Do...do you know what you have done...do you know how this will effect Aaron..." Hazel was already pandering to Paddy shaking her head, " No Paddy HE was alright...Aaron's strong...he...he took control..." she turned to her son so he could confirm her words, but Jackson just laid quiet...Chas was just staring at him.

Paddy looked up, " This...this is all...I can't believe what I've heard...it's just not going in..." he headed to the door,but Hazel stopped him, " Paddy...YOU do understand don't you...You can understand how desparate Jackson was...is...", Paddy glared at her...Paddy was still NOT happy, but Aaron's welfare came first..he needed to find the poor lad...

Chas was STILL staring at Jackson...Jackson would glance at her now and then...not quite knowing what she was thinking...but now there was movement...Chas came nearer to him...and she pointed her finger, " YOU...YOU...say this was out of love...YOU get MY SON to end your sad little life..." she hissed with contempt, Hazel having failed to stop Paddy from leaving hurried over to her, "Chas please...DON'T start..."

Chas was shaking her head...there was tears in her eyes, " I haven't STARTED anything...HE...YOUR precious son was CLEARLY going to get Aaron to FINISH something though..."

Hazel shook her head, " NO...Aaron was okay...is okay...he wanted to help...HE loves Jackson...HE'LL DO anything for him...", it was THOSE words that got Chas to face her, "oh yeah...and Jackson knows that...just what he needs to get Aaron to do what he wants..."

Jackson looked up to protest but Hazel got there first, " are you saying MY BOY took advantage of Aaron emotionally...because you are SO far off the mark it's untrue..."

Chas smiled at her...but not in a nice way...it was a knowing way, " nah...THAT'S WHAT i'm saying...Jackson's crossed the line...NOW...if you excuse me I've got to go find me son..." she crossed over to the door and turned to them both before she went out,

"If this has harmed him in ANY WAY...IF this has sent him over the edge...I'll be doing some killing of me own...YAH SICK...both of yah!" and she went out...the slamming door shook the house.

Hazel's face fell to the floor...Jackson's head banged his pillow several times...both not knowing what to do, "it's...true..." said Jackson...his voice barely audible.

Hazel looked up to him, "what's true...what's true sweatheart..."

Jackson lifted his head to face her and swallowed, " I know how Aaron ticks...I manipulated him...I used emotional blackmail to keep him...to get him to do this...to get him TO SEE he needed to do this for me...oh mum...will he EVER forgive me..."

Hazel rushed forward, " COURSE he will...he LOVES Yah!"

Jackson laid his head back and stared at the ceiling, " maybe he will...but i'll bet THEM pair will turn him against me...i've got to face the facts mum...I've changed me mind for nothing...when THEY'VE finished with him...Aaron will NOT want to see me again..."

TBC

Please review as always!


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Emmerdale or it's characters, they belong to ITV

A/N: Hi, this story will only run a few chapters or so...but it is MY take on the current storyline...Jackson may of had a change of heart here...but it doesn't necessarily mean a happy ever after...here's chapter two...please let me know what you think...PS, chapter 11 is up for my other story. MARK xx

Jackson lifted his head to face her and swallowed, " I know how Aaron ticks...I manipulated him...I used emotional blackmail to keep him...to get him to do this...to get him TO SEE he needed to do this for me...oh mum...will he EVER forgive me..."

Hazel rushed forward, " COURSE he will...he LOVES Yah!"

Jackson laid his head back and stared at the ceiling, " maybe he will...but i'll bet THEM pair will turn him against me...i've got to face the facts mum...I've changed me mind for nothing...when THEY'VE finished with him...Aaron will NOT want to see me again..."

THREE DAYS LATER...

Aaron laid on his bed in his room at Smithy cottage...for the last three days he hadn't really moved...Paddy would come to the door and knock...but Aaron wouldn't answer his pleas...nor his Mother either...she was just as bad. All he could think of was Jackson...the very bloke who wanted to die...for weeks and weeks..banging on and on that THIS was what he wanted...

it was just a cruel blow...how could he do this...how could he just change his mind...it was not that he wanted Jackson to die, COURSE he didn't...it was the very thought that Jackson let him grasp that drink...that lethal cocktail of drugs that would end his life...

The drink...the straw...had been SO close to Jackson's lips...only a hairs breath to taking it...and dying some 'peaceful death'...peaceful...how could death be peaceful...PUTTING HIM DOWN LIKE CLYDE...that's what it was like...HE was Paddy...and JACKSON was Clyde.

The tears rolled down his cheeks...he could feel them again...he just couldn't stop...he was just like a leaky tap...he JUST wanted to HATE Jackson...HATE HIM for what he wanted him to do...but he couldn't...not yet anyway...not that he really knew he even wanted hate him.

The door rapped again, " AARON...please come downstairs hey...Rhona's taken Leo out to Marlon's...we can talk...just you and me..."

Paddy's voice was SO soothing...so gentle...Aaron lifted his heavy head from his pillow and swung his legs round to stand up, he wiped his wet eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie and stood up...swallowing a few times...and sniffing up ALL the snot...he opened the door.

Paddy stood on the landing...he smiled at him...and Aaron tried to smile back...even though it were hard to..."come downstairs...I've made some toast..." Paddy told him, Aaron was hungry...he hadn't eaten much since that day...only coming out his room in the dead of night to grab a snack when everyone was in bed...baby Leo having worn out Rhona and Paddy to even hear him.

Aaron followed Paddy down the stairs...he could smell the toast...his stomach rumbled...maybe just for a while...just for a while...then he'll retreat back to his room.

In Dale head, Hazel fed Jackson his cereal...the whole atmosphere was deadly silent...just the din of the spoon hitting the side of the cereal bowl.

Hazel looked a mess...she was worn out...three nights she hadn't slept...she thought she'd sleep easy now Jackson had changed his mind about dying...BUT had he...because THAT was all she could think about in the dead of night...in the cold darkness.

Jackson was sad...he hadn't said much to his mum...just simple chitchat...always skirting around THAT subject...all he could think about was Aaron...why hadn't he come around...was he right...had Paddy and Chas turned him against him...he couldn't blame them...for what he had Aaron do...his mum do...

Hazel hadn't left the house in 3 days...the cupboards were getting low...she had to go out to the shop...after feeding Jackson his breakfast, she began to tidy herself up, Jackson could see she was and looked up, " are you off out...", Hazel nodded quietly, " we need food...we'll starve otherwise...", Jackson bit his lip, then asked, " can you call round Aaron's...see if he is...okay..."

"COURSE HE'S NOT!" Hazel blazed at him...she then instantly pandered to his side at the bed, " ohhhh...I'm sorry...it's just...it was hard and...", Jackson shook his head at her, " I know...I put you...you AND Aaron through hell...but I need to talk to him...please...", Hazel nodded...she wasn't sure she could though...what mood Aaron was in was not known...he could fly off the handle...at her...at Jackson.

"I'll see what I can do...but you can always...call him..." she suggested, before grasping her handbag and vacated the premises, Jackson turned toward the mobile...he nodded his head back to change the call setting to AARON...for a moment he just stared at Aaron's face on the phone...before laying his head back...and did nothing.

At Smithy, Aaron had munched through his toast, Paddy watched him, just pleased Aaron was downstairs again...but HE needed to tackle him...HE had too...Paddy brought two brews over to the table and sat down, for a few moments he just sat and stared at Aaron, before the teenager turned, " come on...out with it...you want to ask me stuff...", Paddy flustered abit...but pulled himself together quickly, "yes...about...about...", Aaron rolled his eyes, "about what I did to Jackson...nearly did..." Paddy nodded, " Aaron YOU DO realise what would have happened to you...you know...if you went along with it...succeeded I mean..." Aaron shook his head, " Yeah course I do...but Jackson had it ALL covered...he had everything planned for us...to the finest detail...he was looking after me and Hazel..."

Paddy couldn't believe what he was hearing " IT WOULD HAVE BEEN MURDER AARON...!". Paddy didn't mean to shout...it just came out...Aaron was frantically shaking his head now, "NO...it would have been assisted suicide...he...WE read up on it the internet...he...WE had every base covered...to not implenment me or Hazel...you know...", Paddy was reeling inside...had Aaron been THAT BRAINWASHED..."Aaron!...can you hear yourself...IT WOULD BE MURDER...the police would have seen it that way...it doesn't matter how much input Jackson had in it...he'll be DEAD...what happened to YOU and Hazel afterwards wouldn't of been his concern would it..."

Aaron angrily stood up, his face screwing up, " NO...Jackson was looking out for us...he cares...he loves me..."

Paddy couldn't help being flippant, " LOVES YOU ENOUGH to let YOU ruin your life!"

Aaron bolted to the door, "NO...just shut your mouth...SHUT IT..." tears sprang from his eyes, Paddy stood up, " Aaron wait...I didn't mean it that way...it's just...Jackson was a desparate lad...he HAD to be to ask you..and Hazel to do that...I just saying just maybe...however very small...Jackson took advantage of HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HIM...that's all..."

Aaron couldn't bare that...he pulled open the door and bolted out...Paddy went to follow but the door had slammed in his face...he knew...long knew Aaron to know...he had to wait until the lad calmed down.

Aaron ran through the village towards the churchyard, he then slumped next to grandad Shadrach's grave, and sobbed...his mobile then tingled into life...he pulled it out his trakkies pocket, and stared at the screen **JACKSON CALLING...**

Aaron bit his lip as the phone shook in his hand...he then switched it to voice mail...and waited...

He must of waited for an hour or so...because he had justed stared into his own little world...a world where he was happy...and Jackson was walking...a world that was just now a fragment of his imagination.

He shook himself into reality, and stared down at his phone...one message...a message from Jackson...what was he gonna say...he swallowed nervously...already thinking maybe just not listen to it and erase it...but no...he put the phone to his ear and pressed 'play'

Jackson's voice sounded sad...and low...

"Aaron...Aaron...I'm sorry...I am SO sorry mate...I just don't know what else to say...I changed me mind...and I'm thinking...or guessing YOU want to know why...maybe it's just because I am a coward...I was shitting meself...and I WAS...I think...but it wasn't just that...it were the other night about your plans...you remember Aaron...the other night...when you were in your sleeping bag and me in me bed...and we just talked like we used too..and you said about yah plans for you and me...about how we would leave the village...how we'll set me mum free to get on with her life again...reminding me it's all about YOU and ME against the world...and how you said it was all just a pipe dream now..." Aaron was choking up again...and he could hear Jackson's voice breaking up with emotion, "and i said to yah it would NEVER happen, and this life ISN'T for me...I LOVE YOU Aaron...I DO...I...wanted that to...I DO...you...and ...me...against the world...please call me...please Aaron..."

And the message had ended...Aaron sniffed up his tears...and pocketed the mobile...on standing he headed in the direction of Dale head...on to reach the edge of the churchyard where his legs went to jelly...he couldn't do it...he couldn't face Jackson...

Aaron went into his own world again...before Hazel was hurrying up to him, "Aaron love...Aaron...", Aaron turned to her, he didn't quite know what to say...only, "how is he..."

"Alive..." breathed Hazel, " and I'm glad...glad didn't have to do that...", Aaron only shook his head facing over her, " Aaron...come with me...Jackson wants to see you...wants to explain...", Aaron faced her and shook his head, " No...I can't it's TOO soon..."

"but he wants to see you...please Aaron...I can't do this on me own...I keep thinking he'll change his mind again...please Aaron...", Hazel was beginning to beg...and Aaron wasn't having it, " HE'S STILL DOING IT...NO HAZEL, NO...I'M NOT COMING AROUND NOW...OR EVER!", Aaron began to storm off, Hazel hurried after him, " Aaron!...arn't you EVEN GLAD he's alive...!", Aaron swung around to her teeth gritted, " COURSE I AM!...WHAT A QUESTION TO ASK!...it's just..." he placed his hands on his head...his mind torn in two..." I Can't..."

They had been spotted...Chas was marching over from the pub, " OI...HAZEL GET AWAY FROM MY SON!", Hazel turned to Chas, " I'm only talking...we are only talking Chas...it's alright..."

"NO IT'S FLAMING WELL NOT ALRIGHT!...GET AWAY FROM HIM...", Aaron backed away, and bolted back towards Smithy, Chas pointed, " SEE...SEE what you've done, YOU and your flaming Son!", Hazel was teary. " Chas please...Jackson loves him he just wants..."

"I DON'T CARE WHAT HE WANTS LOVE...HE STAYS AWAY FROM MY SON...DO YAH HEAR ME...IF YOUR SON LOVED HIM...HE WOULD OF NEVER ASKED...FORCED HIM INTO IT!", she started to hare off, Hazel followed her, " Chas please...what can we do...to make things right...Jackson just wants to know...PUT THIS RIGHT...if he can..."

Chas turned and smiled, " yeah there is..." she came straight up to her...face to face, " "you and HIM can MOVE!...because MY son is hurting SO much and there's nowt i can do for him...and I BLAME HIM your SON...so just tell him not go leaving the house anytime soon or I might be tempted to mowe him down...DO YAH GET ME!", Chas then stormed off reeling with anger, Hazel faced the ground...how long would the full out last for...and would it get any better...OR...worse...

Aaron laid on his bed again...and he sobbed...he looked toward his dresser and saw Jackson's beaming face on a photo taken in lanzarotte...he stood up and went over to it...he gently picked it up...and stared at it...before hurtling it angrily to the wall...

Jackson turned and saw his mother enter the house, " Sorry I was so long love...I...well...", Jackson turned his head on the pillow, " You saw him didn't yah..."

Hazel wanted to lie...but Jackson always could tell when she was lying, " Yes love...I saw him...", Jackson's eyes lit up hopefully...but Hazel sadly shook her tired old faced, " I'm sorry love...don't think he'll be coming here any time soon...", she sadly headed towards the stairs with the bags, " I need to put away the shopping...I won't be long..."

Jackson could hear his mum disappear up the stairs...he had given her a hint of a smile...that instantly faded when she had gone...he faced towards a photo of him and Aaron on the window ledge..."I won't give up on yah..." he whispered...but he couldn't help thinking just maybe...

Aaron had already given up on him...

TBC

Please review as always!


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Emmerdale or it's characters, they belong to ITV

A/N: Hi, this story will only run a few chapters or so...but it is MY take on the current storyline...Jackson may of had a change of heart here...but it doesn't necessarily mean a happy ever after...here's chapter three..please let me know what you think...PS, chapter 11 is up for my other story. MARK xx

Jackson turned and saw his mother enter the house, " Sorry I was so long love...I...well...", Jackson turned his head on the pillow, " You saw him didn't yah..."

Hazel wanted to lie...but Jackson always could tell when she was lying, " Yes love...I saw him...", Jackson's eyes lit up hopefully...but Hazel sadly shook her tired old faced, " I'm sorry love...don't think he'll be coming here any time soon...", she sadly headed towards the stairs with the bags, " I need to put away the shopping...I won't be long..."

Jackson could hear his mum disappear up the stairs...he had given her a hint of a smile...that instantly faded when she had gone...he faced towards a photo of him and Aaron on the window ledge..."I won't give up on yah..." he whispered...but he couldn't help thinking just maybe...

Aaron had already given up on him...

ONE WEEK LATER...

It had been 10 whole days since he last saw Jackson...that horrible image stuck in his mind like some twisted nightmare plaguing his dreams, that nightmare scenerio of him feeding Jackson that cocktail of death...and sometimes he would wake up sweating...because sometimes he dreamt he had actually done it...Jackson was dead.

Aaron stared out his bedroom window, as the rain lashed up against it in a gusty wind...it was supposed to be flaming June...but there was NOTHING flaming about it...in fact he felt cold...cold outside...and cold inside...because he felt nothing but a numbness deep with in his bones...his eyes ached...he would cry for most of the night, and he was tired...he needed to pull himself together...he knew that...but when...WHEN would he have the courage and FACE Jackson...

He sat back down upon the bed, and pulled out his mobile...Jackson had called again...although he hadn't left a message...he had given up on that...but he hadn't given up on calling him...but he couldn't answer yet...he wasn't ready to talk...not yet, it was too soon...instead he stared at the display of the mobile, and went into a happier place...his memories.

Downstairs, Paddy opened the door to Adam, who let himself in, " Blimey...it's like winter out..." Adam told, Paddy nodded at him...wandering why he was calling by, Adam could sense that and enlightened Paddy, " HE called me...Aaron...he wants to go out like...", Paddy was surprized...no...in fact he was shocked...Aaron had rarely left the bedroom for the past week...going out seemed...unbelievable somehow, " ohhh...erm...well Aaron's upstairs...he hasn't said anything about going out..."

"It's because I didn't want you to make any fuss..." answered Aaron has he came into the lounge, on turning to him, Paddy could see Aaron had tarted himself up, " Wow...you seem..."

"Alive" asked Aaron, " Yeah...I feel it today...cheers for this Adam...", Adam nodded...although he wandered why Aaron had made out it was HIS idea to go out and it wasn't...Aaron had called him, " well cab's booked...should be here in a mo...", Aaron wandered into the kitchen, and pulled out two beers from the fridge, he came back in and handed one to Adam, " Better get us ourselves in the mood hey...", Adam glanced at Paddy...deep down this wasn't a good idea...but what could he do...Aaron would only spout off at him if he said owt, Rhona was then calling him from upstairs, " PADDY COME ON...WHERE ARE YOU WITH THEM NAPPIES!" she cried, Paddy flustered and snatched a bag of them from the corner of the lounge, he turned to them, "Well...have a nice night out...", Aaron raised his beer, " yeah...I intend to..."

Upstairs, Rhona was cleaning up baby Leo on their bed, Paddy came in with the nappies, " It's about time what kept you..." cried Rhona, Paddy watched as Rhona started to put a nappy on the baby, " It's Aaron...HE'S going out...", Rhona rolled her eyes, " oh yeah...and what's so strange about that...he's a young lad...", Paddy nodded,"Yeah but after all what's happened...", Rhona finished seeing to Leo, and looked up, " Been through...Paddy YOU haven't told me anything...all I know is Aaron was upset...has hidden himself in his room for a week...and when you do see him it's a grunt in the dead of night...", Paddy hadn't told Rhona about what Aaron had nearly done to Jackson...no one knew...except for him and Chas..."he's just...going through it at the moment..." told Paddy finally...Rhona watched her baby sleep, " Haven't WE ALL...you just got to get on with it...look...tell me...don't tell me, it's up to you Paddy, but Aaron better buck up soon...I mean it...we got to think of this little one now...not HIM and his strops..."

Hazel looked out the window to see the taxi pull up outside Smithy cottage...she could just make out Aaron and Adam jumping in and it pulled off..."What's so interesting to see out there...", asked Jackson, where he laid on his bed looking at her, Hazel closed the blind and turned, " the rain...it's absolutely chucking it down out there..." she tried to smile...but it was forced...what the hell of Aaron doing...going out in a cab...

Jackson turned his head to the TV, he bit his lip, then turned back to his mum, " can you switch the TV off...and get me in me chair please...",Hazel was in a dream...she clearly hadn't heard him, " MUM...", Hazel turned to him, " sorry darling...I was just in a world of me own..."

"where...BETTER than here I suppose...", Hazel came forward, " no...just somewhere hot...and sunny...", Jackson lowered his eyes, " what I just said...better than here...just think...if I went through with it...YOU could be sunning yourself on some nice exotic beach by now..." he said with a half grin, Hazel hated the joking...she shook her head at him, " Don't SAY that...please Jackson...", Jackson laid his head back, " I know...I don't mean to...but...sometimes...just sometimes...I wished we'd done it..."

Hazel's face dropped...she knew this would happen sooner or later...HIM changing his mind again...she couldn't face that again...NOT AGAIN...she looked up at him, " I'll make you a nice brew a...", Jackson nodded at her, " No...I don't wanna brew Mum...I want you to get me up, and into me chair...I JUST SAID...", Hazel looked at the clock, " but it's nearly 8...you usually like to get settled for 9..."

"I wanna go see Aaron..." he said...his voice had lowered, Hazel could see Jackson's face clearly showed how much he missed him, " He won't take me calls...and he hasn't been round...so I need to go to him...", Hazel shook her head, " Nah...there's no need for that love...you can..." she shrugged wondering what to say, " maybe you can see him tomorrow a..."

Jackson's eyes narrowed at her, " what do you know...", Hazel headed toward the stairs," I go make that brew..."

" MUM!...SOD the brew...WHAT IS IT...", Hazel paused at the stairs and turned to him, " He's gone out...with Adam...it was...what took me interest outside just now..." she informed sadly, "I'm sorry love...but it looks like HE'S moved on...", Jackson's mouth was agape, Aaron...going OUT...where would he go...he sunk his head back on to the pillow...maybe Aaron HAD moved on...he couldn't blame the lad...what HE had put him through...but like this...not even telling him...didn't he even care anymore...and for a moment he wished he could wipe away the tear now falling down his cheek...

Aaron's mind was in a daze as the dance music blasted his ears...Bar West was heaving tonight...and he was enjoying himself, Adam sat on the stall next to him at the bar, both watching the clubbers dance...

"So...have you...not SEEN him!" asked Adam, for the whole evening Aaron had avoided any conversation's that began with Jackson...but now seeing since Aaron had a few...he had loosened up abit, Aaron was screwing up his face..."WHY would I wanna see HIM for...what he MADE me do...", Adam stared at him somewhat puzzled, " MADE YOU...but you said the other day HE had it all planned...and you and Hazel were up for helping him...", Aaron shot him a mean glance, " HEY...YOU haven't told anyone owt have yah...NO ONE is to know...what we did...", Adam shook his head at him, " No...I won't mate...you told me NOT to and I won't...I'm just worried for yah...", Aaron had been secretly given some blonde bloke the eye up all night, he stood up, when he saw the bloke disappear across the busy dance floor to the gents, he downed his beer and turned to Adam, " I need a slash...get them in yeah...", Adam shook his head in disbelief, was it wise for Aaron to get hammered like this...but then again how could he stop him...it would of been an impossible task...

Aaron meanwhile entered the gents and instantly saw the blonde at the urinal, swallowing nervously Aaron stood next to him and unzipped his jeans...Aaron was in a cold sweat...maybe it was just the rush of the beer in him...he lowered his eyes to the others cock...then looked up to be greeted with a nice, but shy smile...the others blue eyes, shooting a glance to the cubicle...Aaron knew the drill...he was inexperianced at this, but knew what to do...the blonde bolted into the cubicle...Aaron followed...and as soon as that cubicles door was slammed shut...their mouths locked with lust...and already they tore at eachothers shirts...the blonde working his mouth on his nipples...and lowered to his naval...Aaron breathed out in lust...the guy making him feel like he wanted to explode...that guy...that guy...whose face he could only imagine was Jackson...

TBC

Please review as always!


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: I haven't updated this in a while...and I have had a few PM's to do it...SORRY...I don't usually forget stories...it's just I've been working on MY other story...a one that is more established...BUT...I did say this won't have too many chapters...just 7 or so...so to those who have been waiting...and sorry for anyone hoping to see the back of it...here's chapter 4...hopefully it won't be as long as last time for an update...JUST keep nagging me...XX

Aaron was in a daze...he could feel the guy's breath on his...and he hated it...loathed it...this wasn't Jackson...this was some scanky tart...WHAT the hell was he doing...he pulled up his jeans and started to open the cubicles door, the guy stopped him...not really understanding..."hey...come here yah prick tease..." he cried...Aaron who now had tears in his eyes flew for him...he grabbed the guys arm and pulled him out the cubicle...and on to the wet floor...other punter started to shout for help...especially as they could see Aaron was in a right drunken state...and clearly looked as if he was gonna cave the other guys head in...

"AARON...STOP!" cried Adam, Aaron looked up to see Adam holding his hands up to him, " Aaron...please mate...come with me yeah...HE'S not worth it..."

Aaron forced himself away from the lad...and let himself be pulled out the gents by Adam...at the bar his friend turned to him, " WHAT was all THAT about in there!" he yelled, "YOU CAN'T go beating lads up like that...I KNOW you are going throught it and all...", Aaron turned to him...his eyes red from the sobbing, " GOING THROUGH...DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH DO YAH..." Adam tried to comfort his mate, " no I don't...COURSE I don't...but,...", Aaron shook him off, " JUST-LEAVE-ME-ALONE..." he then bolted towards the clubs exit...Adam sighed as he looked after him...he hoped Aaron wouldn't lose it...the LAST thing he needed on TOP of everything else, was bother from the police...

The room was darkened...just the flickering light from the TV...Hazel sat on the top step looking down toward Jackson's room...Jackson had been glum all evening...ever since she informed him of Aaron going out with Adam earlier...WHY did she have to say that...NOT that Jackson would believe any of her lies...if she told them...HE always knew when she was making up stories...

She sighed and picked her self up and headed down the stairs...and rounding the corner, she saw Jackson just staring at the TV..."SO...anything good on..." she said...trying to sound cheerful...BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO BE CHEERFUL...HE WAS ALIVE...and NOT...

Jackson rolled his head to her, "IS Aaron back yet...", Hazel shook her head, " I don't know love...I haven't been watching out for him...look...love...", she rounded his bed and sat in the chair, and stroked his arm...a touch SHE knew he couldn't feel, " MAYBE...maybe I shouldn't have said what I said...Maybe Aaron's just gone out for a drink with Adam...IT ALL could be very innocent..."

Jackson smiled at her sadly, " MUM...don't go making excuses for him...WHAT I PUT HIM THROUGH...WHO COULD BLAME HIM A..." he faced back to the TV, " Maybe it's JUST not ment to be hey...JUST because I've changed me mind...DOESN'T MEAN he can't to..."

Hazel nodded sadly...and then brushed his chheks, " JUST me and you then kid...", Jackson smiled as he watched the TV...well...looked at the screen...Hazel knew her son wasn't watching it...she stood and went to make them both a brew...but received a text message, Jackson turned, "WHOSE IT FROM...you got some man hiding away somewhere..." he cracked, "NO love..." said turned her head, " JUST yah father...coming over tomorrow with Josh...THAT'LL be nice won't it...", Jackson shook his head, not really interested, "yeah...it will..."

The Sun shone brightly over the village the next morning...and Aaron sat outside Smithy with a thick head...WHAT had he been thinking last night...WHY had he decided to...DO THAT...well he didn't...but nearly...and as for Adam...MAYBE he was not a pratt for not letting him smash that lad's face in, not that it was that lad's fault...not really, not deep down...HE followed him into those toilets...HE knew what would be expected of him...when it came down to it, he looked up and squinted to see Hazel approaching from the road, Aaron stood up to go back inside.

"Aaron...please love...don't go in..." cried out Hazel...desparation in her tone, Aaron paused...sighed and looked around, " what is it...can't you just leave me alone...", Hazel waved her hand out to him, " Aaron please...come round and see Jackson will yah...he MISSES you...", Aaron placed his hands on his hips and stared at her, "I've told yah...I'm just not ready to face him...NOT yet..."

"But...he wants...needs to see yah...Aaron please he changed his mind...and HE did THAT for you...NOT me...", told Hazel...her voice cracking up.

Aaron shook his head, "yeah well...MAYBE he's just a coward and couldn't GO through with it..."

Hazel shook her head, " NO...he did it for YOU love..."

"Maybe HE was using me...to GET what he wanted..." he slowly approached her, "you getting what i'm saying are yah...maybe HE..." he pointed into the diection of dale head, "...knew that I WOULD DO IT...and WOULD do anything for him...including THAT...", Hazel had tears in her eyes, " no Aaron you are wrong...JACKSON LOVES YOU..."

It was Aaron's turn this time to get upset, " COURSE HE DOES...when it suits...DO you really think he would have PUT ME through with all that...if he loved me...", Hazel bit her lip...she could see the hurt and anger still fresh in Aaron's face...STILL...even after 11 days...

"look...Jerry's coming round...he's bringing little Josh with him..." she was nodding for Aaron to WANT to come round, " WE...me and Jackson...WE have to act normal...and we can't do that...NOT on our own Aaron...we...HE needs yah help Aaron...PLEASEEE come around...PLEASEEE see him..."

Aaron fault his emotions and shook his head, " NO hazel...never...I'm NEVER coming around there..."

Hazel gave up...it was like talking to a stone, she backed away, " fine then...IF that's the way you feel...EVEN though HE changed HIS mind for you...and do you know why he did that...BECAUSE of what you said...your plans...remember HIM telling yah...well I guess he can safely forget all about them can't he...BECAUSE IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN...is it...", Hazel tried to shout...but she couldn't muster the effort...the strength...she just closed her eyes and walked off toward Dale head...Aaron watched her go...his blue eyes tracing her journey back to Dale head...he then with a huge sigh went indoors...he just wanted to lie down and just forget...FORGET IT ALL...

At midday, Hazel looked out the window to see Jerry pull the car up onto the garage forecourt nextdoor, she turned to Jackson who was i his chair, " he's here..." she told, Jackson raised his eyebrowes at her, " yep...looks like we are going to have to pretend we are going up for an oscar, for the amount of acting WE are gonna have to do...", Hazel waved her hand at him, " look love, WE don't need anyone...WE decided that...",Jackson wheeled over to her side at the window, " and what if HE asks about Aaron...HE'S gonna wonder why he aint here...", Hazel was readying to answer the door, " WE play it by ear...ANYWAY...he might not even ask a...", Jackson smiled...ALL this pretence...and there was NO need for it anymore...Hazel was opening the door, and Jerry came through with a big smile, "You alright mate...how's you been..." Jackson raised his eyebrowes and smiled...seeing little Josh in his dad's arms, " it's been great!...I was just SAYING to me mum...getting up and IN my chair is the high light of my day..." the sarcasim wasn't wasted on Jerry...he glanced at Hazel who came forward trting to lighten the mood, " hello my little darling..." she took Josh from Jerry, " and HAVE you been behaving yahself for yah dad..."

Jackson glared at her...AND at Jerry...god why did he change his mind...WAS his life just going to revolve around this...is THIS what he was going to have to endure in the future...played out...and NOT very well acted family get togethers...he wheeled back and turned the chair around...he looked to the floor with a frown...WHY DID HE CHANGE HIS MIND...

Aaron laid upon his bed...and stared at the photo of him and Jackson...he held up his hand and traced the outline of Jackson's face...he thought about HIM over there...he had seen Jerry go in with little Josh in his grasp...Jackson was over there...with THEM...and feeling...

The knock on the door forced Aaron out of his thoughts...Paddy stood there in the doorway, "how you been...haven't SEEN you all day..." he asked with a smile, Aaron rolled over and glared at him, " what are yah...MY keeper or somemit", Paddy shook his head and stuttered, "no...errr...it's just...how did yah night out go...with Adam I mean..I must admit...it was a bit of a surprize YOU going out...SO SOON i mean...you know...after..."

"nearly KILLING OFF me boyfriend...yes Paddy...it was a bit weird for me too..." he jibed, Paddy came in not really knowing what to do with his hands, " errrr...yah Mum called round a minute ago...", Aaron nodded, " I heard her...BIT HARD not too...", Paddy sighed at him, "SHE'S worried about you...WE both are...especially when YOU act like this..."

Aaron sat up, " look...haven't you got Rhona and Leo to fuss on or somemit...I just WANT to be on me own Paddy...", Paddy knew when to back off...and THIS was one of those moments, "well...YOU know where I am...",

Paddy made his way done the stairs where Chas was waiting, " isn't he coming down OR WHAT...Cain's getting kinda pissed of that HE'S not shown up for work...", Paddy tilted his head, "DO YOU think he's ready...WOULD YOU if you had nearly done what HE did...", Chas shook her head, "OHHHHH Paddy!...this is all such a mess...but AT LEAST...at least HE'S away from THEM PAIR...he NEEDS to be...I just...JUST wish they would just MOVE AWAY...let Aaron be..." she spat...Paddy gave her a sympathetic look and gave her a hug...and Rhona wasn't too happy seeing that either...

Over at Dale head, Jerry drank his tea...and watched Hazel playing on the bed with Josh...Jackson stared at them all like a spectator...like he was looking in on some other family...Jerry...looking as if he'd just remembered Jackson was even sat there turned, "so...where IS the chav...as much as I despise him...HE'S YOUR Partner choice...thought at least he'd be here...even though HE hates me..."

Jackson glared at him, " HE always made the effort!" he cried, Jerry was alittle taken aback by the outburst, " MADE the effort...SO what's going on..." Jerry's face had hardened, and he looked at Hazel...and noticed Hazel kept glancing toward Jackson, " AM I missing something here..." spat Jerry...

Jackson looked up to him...his face looked sad, " I KNEW IT...HE'S flaming left yah!..just wait until I..."

and all looked toward the door as it was pushed open...

...and by sheer amazement...the MOST unlikely thing happened, Aaron stepped inside...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: I haven't updated this in a while...and I had time today...xx

Over at Dale head, Jerry drank his tea...and watched Hazel playing on the bed with Josh...Jackson stared at them all like a spectator...like he was looking in on some other family...Jerry...looking as if he'd just remembered Jackson was even sat there turned, "so...where IS the chav...as much as I despise him...HE'S YOUR Partner choice...thought at least he'd be here...even though HE hates me..."

Jackson glared at him, " HE always made the effort!" he cried, Jerry was alittle taken aback by the outburst, " MADE the effort...SO what's going on..." Jerry's face had hardened, and he looked at Hazel...and noticed Hazel kept glancing toward Jackson, " AM I missing something here..." spat Jerry...

Jackson looked up to him...his face looked sad, " I KNEW IT...HE'S flaming left yah!..just wait until I..." and all looked toward the door as it was pushed open...and by sheer amazement...the MOST unlikely thing happened, Aaron stepped inside...

Jerry glared at him...but before he could say owt, Jackson gasped out, " AARON...", Aaron slowly faced him...he placed his hands in hoodie pockets and approached him, " alright mate...sorry i'm late..." he turned and faced Hazel, " yeah mum never said owt to me till this smorning..."

Hazel discreetly smiled at him, then turned to Jerry, " YOU see, NOTHING to fret about...we are all just fine here..."

Jerry and Josh stayed till 2, Hazel watched as Jerry stood and snatched up Josh, " right...better get back, Eileen will be waiting for us...", he turned to Hazel, " she's having her hair done...", Aaron watched as Jerry approached Jackson, "WE should get another footie trip set up...MAYBE YOU..." he glanced up to Aaron "...can sort it..."

Aaron nodded and watched Jerry kiss his son's forehead and was off, Hazel stood at the open door and closed it behind him, "WELL that was all very nice..." she cooed happily, Aaron had bolted up out the seat and was heading to the door, Jackson turned, his eye's widening, there had been NO real chat between them when Jerry was there...it was all just polite...or nothing at all..."Aaron...STAY...please..." he said desparately, Aaron was at the door, he turned slowly, "I...I can't Jackson...I can't stay here...I did it for yah mum...NOT you..." he then was out the door, Hazel slowly closed it behind him...she looked across to her son...he had turned the chair around and KNEW he was sobbing...WHY was Aaron doing this to him...if he was punishing him for...for putting him through THAT...then so be it...but NOW was enough...it was enough...Hazel came to his side, " give him time love...",

"HOW MUCH TIME!", Jackson spat between sobs, " I HAVE to face facts mum...he's left mah...YOU heard him..he did this for you...I have to be honest with meself... he's NOT coming BACK!" Hazel put her hand to her mouth...she felt like crying herself, but she faught the tears back, she instead wiped away Jackson's...

Aaron was half way down main street when his tears started to roll down his cheeks, he paused and glanced back at Dale head...HE did go because of Hazel...she looked so desparate this morning...when she had asked him to come along...to help with Jerry's visit.

But Aaron DID think of Jackson...he WANTED to see him...it had been 11 days for godsakes, the LAST time he saw him was THAT day...he wanted to see his face...

But he couldn't stay...HE couldn't...it wouldn't be right...NOT NOW...not with him feeling like the way we did...conflicted...

He made his way to Smithy...where Paddy was waiting for him...Aaron could see by the expression on Paddy's stoney face that HE knew where he had been...

" WE have to talk...YOU and ME..." Paddy said bluntly.

Aaron reluctantly sat at the kitchen table..as Paddy brought over the two brews, " I KNOW it's hard for yah mate...but you can't be going over there...YOU HAVE to do the right thing and stay away...", Aaron looked up to him, he licked his bottom lip, " I WENT over there...because Hazel NEEDED me...Jerry were on a visit...HE'D KNOW there was owt up IF I weren't there..."

Paddy nodded, " yes...and I can UNDERSTAND that...but...you have to put space between THEM and you...otherwise you'll NEVER forget about it...WHAT happened"

Aaron took a sip of his brew, " maybe I just don't wanna forget about it Paddy...Maybe I STILL wanna be involved...", Paddy was aghast, " WHAT...YOU can't be serious...NOT AFTER ALL what's went on...", he could see Aaron rolling his eyes, as if to say shut up, so Paddy tried a different approach, " look Aaron...mate...just say...for instance...that you DID GO through with it...you know if you...", Aaron cut in the faffing about, " spit it OUT Paddy...IF I KILLED JACKSON!"

Paddy nodded his head, " yeah...DO you know what would have happened to you...", Aaron shrugged, and waved his hand, " Jackson has all THAT covered, HAD it all...he would have looked after me and his mum...IT'S ALL on the laptop..."

Paddy could see Aaron was blinkered by this...he slowly nodded his head at him, " IS that what you really believe...AARON I've done alot of research on assisted suicide over the last few days...", Aaron stood up, " oh yeah...SHOULDN'T YOU be paying MORE attention to Rhona and Leo...OR are you gonna leave THAT to Marlon..."

Paddy looked up at Aaron, " LOOK you are GOING to here this is you LIKE this all NOT!", Aaron glared at him, " what then...WHAT do you know what Jackson didn't..DOESN'T..."

"IT'S MURDER!...IT'S MURDER AARON...you would of gone to trial over it...YOU COULD HAVED FACED JAIL...", Aaron shook his head, " no...Jackson wouldn't of LET that happen..."

Paddy jumped up...WHY WOULDN'T AARON LISTEN!, " AND WHAT concern is it of his THEN...HE'D be DEAD Aaron!...THERE'S NOTHING he could have done to save yah..he'd be dead...IT WOULDN'T be his concern...he'll be gone!", Aaron made for the stairs, his temper flaring up, he then swung around, and pointed, " WHY are you doing THIS...WHY are you trying to turn me AGAINST Jackson!"

"I'm NOT...I'm JUST trying to make you see sense Aaron...THAT LAD USED YOU...!"

Aaron shook his head, getting stressed, " NO...he loves me...I LOVE HIM!"

"EXACTLY!...JUST THE THING he needed to get you to do this Aaron...YOU'D DO ANYTHING FOR HIM...and HE knew that..."

Paddy wished he could take back those words, but before he could, Aaron bolted out the stairs to his room.

Over at Dale Head, Hazel had made Jackson his tea, she came down the stairs with the tray...Jackson was in his chair, staring out the window, "HERE we go my lovely boy...I've made yah favourite...", Jackson leaned his head back, and turned his chair around, " I THOUGHT i'd go for a pint tonight..."he said, raising his eyebrowes, Hazel placed the tray down...and fixed on Jackson's napkin, " the PUB...darling I don't THINK that's a good idea...do you", Jackson frowned at her, " I WANNA PINT MUM!...I've been STUCK in here for days!...I WANN..."

"see if AARON is in there!...YOU SAID IT YAHSELF...HE'S NOT COMING BACK...why DO this to yahself!" she began to feed him, " I'VE got to make the effort mum...WHAT I put him through...IT'S GOT to be ME who makes the moves...well...the non moves..." he smirked at his own little joke about...but Hazel wasn't smiling, she looked up at him, " YOU DO KNOW SHE RUNS THAT PLACE...CHAS..."

Jackson had a mouthful to chew..." Yeahhh..mmm" he managed to say.

" SHE HATES US!...for what we put Aaron through!...WHAT do you think she's gonna DO...welcome us with a big smile and opening arms..." she said with sarcasim.

Jackson swallowed his food, " she hates ME..not you...IT'S ME would did all this...planned it...IT'S ME WHO NEEDS TO BUILD BRIDGES...Mum I need HER to know how much I love Aaron..."

Hazel wasn't convinced...she fed him first, then told him what SHE'D been planning, " WE'RE LEAVING JACKSON...I phoned the council yesterday...WE'RE ON the waiting list...I WANT US TO LEAVE THE VILLAGE...and the sooner the better!"

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: THIS AGAIN...if you want me to continue with this fic, let me know...or I will take it as you are not that bothered! XX

Aaron Livesy pulled the curtain back at his window, it had turned 10 and he was late for work...AGAIN...like he had been all week, he sighed out heavily, and went over and pulled on a tee shirt, and then sat down on his bed, to pull on a pair of trakkies.

On standing, his eyes glanced over to the photo of him and Jackson on his bedside cabinet, he reached out to it, and stared at the image of his boyfriend,

EX boyfriend

It had been 20 days since... THAT day...

He had seen Jackson once since then...and that was a week ago when Jerry had payed a visit, HE had decided since then...

He had decided that... THAT DAY... had changed everything, NOTHING would ever be then same between them...not to mention his Mum and Paddy hating Jackson's guts...well, hated was a too of a strong word, they just didn't want him to have anything to do with him anymore...and considering all the hassle it would course, Jackson being an EX boyfriend was the only alternative for a peaceful life.

He gently placed the photoframe down and left for work...he thought it wise to skip breakfast...he'll just have to face Cain's fury on an empty stomach that's all.

Over at the pub, Aaron was the topic of conversation with Cain and Chas.

Chas had her back to her brother, as she polished the bar down, " SO have THEM pair fallen out...IS that the reason for the mood he's in...HE'S ALWAYS in..." fished Cain.

Cain was fed up to the back teeth with Aaron's mood swings, enough was enough, he hoped that just maybe, however doubtful and unlikely it was..on the account of Aaron and his Mum not being that close...she could shed some light over Aaron's recent behaviour.

Chas turned to him with a sigh, " look...it's complicated Cain...he's just been through the mill abit that's all...", she didn't want to give anything away...but would it hurt if she did...her son was in a state, because his so called boyfriend had practically rail roaded him to assist killing him...a mercy killing...all out from an act of love...a love abit ONE sided she had now long decided on.

"WHAT's HE been through!...just the fact that he's got a disabled boyfriend...IT was HIS decision Chas...HE wanted to stand by him...if all this is because HE wants out and doesn't want to FACE facts...THAT'S his problem NOT mine!...and I'll be making sure i'll be telling him that!"

Before Chas could protest, Cain was out the doors, she throw her dust rag and polish onto the bar...all this was such a mess...WHY couldn't Hazel and Jackson JUST move away...maybe just then Aaron would get back to normal...put all this sorry business behind him...she was in total dispair of it all...

She decided she ought to see Paddy...warn him the Cain wasn't happy...and would be talking to Aaron...heaven knows WHAT that could bring on to them all!

Aaron was at the garage when Cain returned, he was leaning on a motor in deep thought...Cain was shaking his head at him in disbelief, " UNBELIEVABLE!...YOU turn in LATE again...and here you are off with the fairies!"

Aaron looked up at him, " look...I've said i'm sorry alright...I'll be on time tomorrow", Cain pulled on his overalls, " YOU said THE SAME thing yesterday...AND the day before..." he picked up a spanner and pointed it toward Aaron, " you listen here lad...IF this continues...I'M SACKING yah..."

Aaron was out that daydream in an instant, his eyes darting toward his uncle, "W-What..."

"you HEARD mah!" Cain spat, "SOME of us have a business to be running here you know!..."

Aaron immediately started to work on the motor he had been leaning on...but he couldn't focus on the job...all he could think about was Jackson, he throw his tools down in temper.

Cain swung around to him, and pointed, " THAT'S IT GO..."

Aaron glared up at him, " WHY...what would you do if you binned me off, folk are not exactly quing up to get a job here...especially when they find out the PEANUTS you pay!"

Cain came foward, he'd had enough of what he could take from him now, " LOOK HERE...JUST because you WANT OUT of that relationship of yours...it doesn't GIVE you the right to go upsetting other people...IT WAS YOUR CHOICE TO STAY WIT HIM!"

Aaron was getting all flustered, his mind was in a spin, " you SHUT yah mouth...YOU KNOW NOWT about it!"

Cain came forward, " THEN TELL me what it is...WHAT'S bothering yah!", Aaron stared at his uncle, he really couldn't do this...he felt sick...he eyed a motor that Cain had completed repairing yesterday, the client coming in to pick it up later, Cain was getting impatient, "AARON!...", the lad backed away and ran to the car, he jumped in and in no time, was screeching off the garages forecourt, Cain called out after him, but there was NO chance Aaron could even begin to hear him.

Cain throw his spanner onto the ground, Aaron had had his mad unpredictable moments in the past...but today...he gazed toward Dale Head...he had had ENOUGH of this...he was going to find out exactly what's gone off...and get to the bottom of it...

Inside Dale Head, Hazel was going through some paper work, that she had recieved through the post that morning, she cheerfully approached Jackson, who was still lying on his bed in his pyjamas, " NOW this is more like it...there is some really nice properties here converted for OUR needs...ohhh, and this one..., she began to flap it out in front of Jackson's face, "...THIS one is really close to the station...", Jackson rolled his eyes at her, " Mummm...I thought WE had already discussed all this the other day...WE are NOT moving...", Hazel looked up at him sourly, "and WHY IS that...because of Aaron i suppose..." Jackson turned his gaze to the wall.

Hazel smiled at him," JUST THINK...a FRESH start for us...somewhere NOBODY knows about..."

Jackson snapped his neck round, " ME TRYING TO TOP MESELF!...WE will know mum...so IF you don't mind, CAN you switch the TV on...and then GO upstairs..."

Hazel folded up the paperwork, again sour face returning, " OKAY...have it YOUR way...I'll just keep going OUT there getting unkindly glances shall i..." she moved to the stairs, holding up her hand, " BUT YOU don't worry yahself about it...afterall, YOU don't have to face everyone..."

Jackson pulled a face at her, " FACE who...IT'S only Paddy and Chas who know about owt!...STOP over exaggerating things WILL yah!"

At that point Cain came storming in through the front door, Hazel looked up shaken by the Cain's entrance, " BLIMEY!, you nearly made me JUMP right out of my skin!...where's the fire!"

Cain ignored her, and came to Jackson's bedside, he leaned down to him, " now...YOU and ME need a chat...don't you think", Jackson licked his lips, and turned his head, " CAN you leave us mum...", Hazel went to protest, but with one menacing glance shot to her by Cain, she grabbed two plastic bags from the nearby chair, " suppose I can go GET the shopping, but I don't want any trouble Cain, Jackson doesn't need it..."

Cain raised his eyebrowes, " AND why is THAT!...anything to do with Aaron!"

Jackson shook his head, " MUM...can you just go please...", Hazel reluctantly left through the door, Cain then pulled up a chair, " RIGHT!...just YOU and ME...now tell me...WHAT'S going off with you and our Aaron!", Jackson glanced at him with a nervous smile, " What do you mean...WHAT'S he said..."

"NOWT!" he said, and leaned in further, " which is why I'M asking you..."

Aaron's palms were getting clammy as he held onto the steering wheel to the speeding car...

he forced his gaze, concentrating on manouvering his way through the country lanes...

and his foot pressed even harder on the gas...

he felt the car go even faster, his heart started to race...he was getting a buzz...he needed something to sort out his mind, and this was just the kick he needed!

He forced the pedal right to the floor, clutching tighter to the wheel...his eyes narrowing ahead...

...until the tractor appeared right out of nowhere...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER 7

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, this is a far more gloomier fic than my other one...and whereas I KNOW how that one ends...I have no idea where this one is going...I don't even know if they will get back together again...with BOTH having new friends shortly!...but with these two, YOU never know! ;) XX

Inside Dale Head, Hazel was going through some paper work, that she had recieved through the post that morning, she cheerfully approached Jackson, who was still lying on his bed in his pyjamas, " NOW this is more like it...there is some really nice properties here converted for OUR needs...ohhh, and this one..., she began to flap it out in front of Jackson's face, "...THIS one is really close to the station...", Jackson rolled his eyes at her, " Mummm...I thought WE had already discussed all this the other day...WE are NOT moving...", Hazel looked up at him sourly, "and WHY IS that...because of Aaron i suppose..." Jackson turned his gaze to the wall.

Hazel smiled at him," JUST THINK...a FRESH start for us...somewhere NOBODY knows about..."

Jackson snapped his neck round, " ME TRYING TO TOP MESELF!...WE will know mum...so IF you don't mind, CAN you switch the TV on...and then GO upstairs..."

Hazel folded up the paperwork, again sour face returning, " OKAY...have it YOUR way...I'll just keep going OUT there getting unkindly glances shall i..." she moved to the stairs, holding up her hand, " BUT YOU don't worry yahself about it...afterall, YOU don't have to face everyone..."

Jackson pulled a face at her, " FACE who...IT'S only Paddy and Chas who know about owt!...STOP over exaggerating things WILL yah!"

At that point Cain came storming in through the front door, Hazel looked up shaken by the Cain's entrance, " BLIMEY!, you nearly made me JUMP right out of my skin!...where's the fire!"

Cain ignored her, and came to Jackson's bedside, he leaned down to him, " now...YOU and ME need a chat...don't you think", Jackson licked his lips, and turned his head, " CAN you leave us mum...", Hazel went to protest, but with one menacing glance shot to her by Cain, she grabbed two plastic bags from the nearby chair, " suppose I can go GET the shopping, but I don't want any trouble Cain, Jackson doesn't need it..."

Cain raised his eyebrowes, " AND why is THAT!...anything to do with Aaron!"

Jackson shook his head, " MUM...can you just go please...", Hazel reluctantly left through the door, Cain then pulled up a chair, " RIGHT!...just YOU and ME...now tell me...WHAT'S going off with you and our Aaron!", Jackson glanced at him with a nervous smile, " What do you mean...WHAT'S he said..."

"NOWT!" he said, and leaned in further, " which is why I'M asking you..."

Aaron's palms were getting clammy as he held onto the steering wheel to the speeding car...

he forced his gaze, concentrating on manouvering his way through the country lanes...

and his foot pressed even harder on the gas...

he felt the car go even faster, his heart started to race...he was getting a buzz...he needed something to sort out his mind, and this was just the kick he needed!

He forced the pedal right to the floor, clutching tighter to the wheel...his eyes narrowing ahead...until the tractor appeared right out of nowhere...

For a split second, Aaron just felt like crashing into the thing, but through 'autopilot' actions, he forced round the steering wheel...the car screeching across the tarmac of the narrow road, and went straight into a wood fense...

Inside Aaron was thrown about...the seat belt saving his arse...he throw his arms to his face as the car came to a halt in a corn field...

Aaron snapped his neck up, he had cut his head on the dash somehow...his heart was racing as he realised what he had done, he forced his neck round to see the tractor still on the road, the farm hand who drove it was running his way, into the cornfield.

Aaron swallowed...the taste of metallic in his mouth...he had managed to gash his lip open as well.

The farm hand hurried to the car's window...he himself in a panic, " hey mate...are you okay!"

Aaron managed to wind down the window...and glared up at the lad, when the lad could see Aaron was alright, but for a few facial injuries, he went mad, " WHAT WERE YOU FLAMING PLAYING AT...YOU NEARLY DROVE STRAIGHT INTO ME!" he yelled in anger.

Aaron hadn't enough fight in him...infact he got upset, " I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." he repeated over and over again.

The farm hand calmed his temper down...this boy was cleary upset over it, " Look...I'm sorry I yelled mate...but YOU WERE driving like a loonertic!"

Aaron stared toward the cornfield, " I've said I'm sorry...WHAT more go yah what...", with that Aaron undid his seat belt and pushed the door open, the farm lad moved out the way, as Aaron started to quickly servey the damage...he throw his arms over his head in frustration, "SHIT...HE'S GONNA KILL ME..." he cried.

The farm hand could see the front of the car had endured alot of damage, "look...do you want me to call anyone for yah..." he asked.

Aaron looked at him...as if he'd only just clapped eyes on him, " WHO are you again...INFACT...JUST DO ONE WILL YAH!" he snapped harshly.

The farmhand waved his hand out, " suit yah self...flaming physcio!" he muttered walking away back to his tractor, Aaron glared after him...then leaned on the bonnet of the car...how ON earth was he gonna explain all this to Cain...

Cain meanwhile, had only just left Dale Head, Jackson had told him nothing new...infact he was just as reluctant to talk over things as Aaron was.

He made his way toward the garage to see Debbie with a customer, Debbie turned round, "Dad...Mr. Highgrove his here to collect his car..."

Cain swallowed...It has Highgrove's car Aaron had sped off in, " errrr...yeah...I've had to send it for a part...It'll be back later..."

Mr. Highgrove was a bit put out, " BUT I was told by some boy on the phone yesterday it'll be ready for collecting today...AND he clearly had an attitude problem!"

Cain was REALLY not bothered by this bloke, " I SAID IT'LL BE BACK LATER, DO ONE!", Mr. Highgrove was a bit taken aback, Debbie took the man's arm, " I'm sorry about that sir...of course we're offer a discount for an inconvienance"

"YES...I THINK that would be a VERY good idea young lady...I have a number of contacts who use this garage around here...I'd HATE word to get out for them NOT to use it..."

Debbie was all gracious, " No...AS I said...MAYBE A full discount canbe arranged..."

Highgrove was happy with that and with one glare to Cain, he walked off, Debbie then turned her attentions to her father, " WHAT the hells going on dad!...where's his car!"

Cain looked at her, " Aaron's just sped away in it THAT'S what...", Debbie chased her dad up the forecourt, " SPED AWAY!...WHY...dad WHAT'S going ON!"

Cain stopped in his tracks and turned, " I don't know...NOBODY KNOWS what goes off in that thick head of his..." he then rose a finger at her, " BUT I'm tellling yah something...as soon as he gets back...HE'S outta here...I'M SACKING HIM!"

Hazel came out the shop, and walked across the road towards Dale Head...her bag laden with groceries, she saw Cain glare at her from the garage, then he turned his head back to a motor...WHAT WAS THE GLARE FOR...DID HE KNOW!

She hurried up to the front door and let herself inside...Jackson was resting his eyes as Hazel was dumping the groceries onto the floor, "RIGHT, WHAT HAVE YOU TOLD HIM!" she cried in a panic.

Jackson kept his eyes closed, " nothing...and CAN you keep the noise down please"

Hazel glared at him, " HOW can you just be calm about it...PEOPLE are starting to get suspicious..."

Jackson snapped his eyes open, " OF WHAT...MUM I've told yah...it's only Paddy and Chas who know about...THAT"

"YES!" cried Hazel coming to his side, "but THEY might let it slip...look..." she went over and snatched up the paperwork from the side, " these houses in Hotten...IT WON'T hurt just to take a look will it..."

Jackson stared at her, "but Mum...we've been through this..."

There was a pleading in her voice now, " PLEAASE Jackson...I just want to move...I don't feel right round here anymore,love..."

Jackson was only just realising how desparate his mum was...ALL THIS was effecting her far MORE than he had realised, " Mum..." he said gently.

Hazel dropped the paperwork onto the side again and slumped into her seat, Jackson was looking at her, " Mum...if you want us to move...then we're move..."

Hazel looked up at him, bravely putting on a smile, " thank you...I...I just want US to get on with our lives, that's all...and we can't do that here..." she looked about the room in distaste, "and NOT in this house..."

Jackson smiled up at her, " HEY...why don't you go make us a brew a..."

Hazel smiled at him, " you fancy one do yah..."

"BLOODY gasping here!" he said, in an exaggerated jokey tone of voice...Hazel came foward and pinched his cheeks, " anything for you my lovely boy...it's going to be JUST you and me...", she then, feeling alot more easier about things, collected two random mugs, and went up the stairs to the kitchen.

Jackson's smile faded when she had gone...he turned his head and gazed at Aaron's smiling photo nearby on the side...his gaze then sadly meeting the floor...

Aaron himself meanwhile had walked back to the garage...with each pace he took...he was dreading what Cain was going to say.

Adam was just coming out the Woolpack when he spotted his mate, " AARON!...wait up mate..."

Aaron stopped in his tracks as Adam came to his side...immediately clocking the injuries to Aaron's face, " BLIMEY...what's happened!" he asked in concern.

Aaron shrugged at him, "crashed a car didn't I...I'm okay...but the motor isn't..." he then met Cain's waiting gaze at the garage, "...and nor is Cain by the look of it...", Adam tried to touch his mates forehead to see how bad the cut was, but Aaron waved him out the way, " CAN YOU NOT be doing that" Adam was on the receiving end of a death glare as well, Adam moved aside, " just call me yeah...you know..." Aaron was already moving off again in the direction of the garage, "...IF you wanna go out one night again mate...!" he called out after him...but getting no response.

Aaron walked straight up to his uncle...then stood there looking at him...Cain leant on the motor he had been working on...chewing...and staring straight back at him.

"SO...arnt yah going to HAVE a GO then!" asked Aaron...waiting patiently for the backlash, but Cain shrugged, " nah...I only would do THAT...to people who work for mah!", he then went back to what he was doing, Aaron came foward, " SO YOU ARE SACKING ME NOW ARE YAH!"

Cain looked up, " no mate...YOU sacked yahself...YOUR ATTITUDE STINKS!...and we can't be affording anymore lost work...so your out!"

Debbie can forward, " oh HE'S back I see...AND WHERE IS IT...THE MOTOR I MEAN..."

Aaron blow his fuse, " IN A FLAMING FIELD...!"he chucked her the key, "I don't work here anymore...SO FINDING IT...is your problem...", he then turned on his heel and strolled off.

Debbie watched him go...in disbelief of WHAT the hell was going on, she waved her hand out, " WHAT- IS- HIS-PROBLEM!"

Cain shook his head, " Don't know kid...BUT the way he's gone...I'm passed caring..."

Aaron let himself in Smithy and saw Paddy and Rhona cooing over baby Leo, Paddy looked up...and saw Aaron's face...the lad had realised, and bolted up the stairs, Paddy came forward, " Aaron wait...", Rhona was glaring at him, " HEY...Baby Leo remember...WE'VE TALKED ABOUT THIS PADDY!"

Aaron was at the top of the stairs, he paused at Rhona's raised voice, " I AM SICK OF HIS MOOD SWINGS..."

"He's just been put through a lot recently..." he heard Paddy say in his defense.

" I'M starting to past caring Paddy...Leo comes FIRST...and I think he senses that bad attitude in him...HE'S a bad influence on him..."

Paddy was laughing, " Ohhhh don't be so melodramatic, he's barely a month old!...look...I'VE got to see what's wrong with him...HE'S got a cut face!"

"PROBERLY UPSET SOMEONE ELSE WITH HIS ATTITUDE!..." snapped Rhona.

Aaron forced his way into his room and throw himself onto his bed, Paddy was then at the doorway, " Aaron...didn't you here me call out..."

"I HEARD yah..." said Aaron...making the heard bit as clearly as he could, Paddy realising WHAT he had heard, " Rhona's abit stressed out...like ALL new Mum's...Leo's very demanding..." he said, trying to explain.

"SO am I, IT seems..!" cried Aaron, not looking at him, Paddy came in and closed the door too, he then sat on the bed, " Aaron...I'm starting to get really concerned for yah...YOU told me you were going to try and put all this behind yah...MOVE on with your life..."

Aaron was fighting the tears, " BUT I CAN'T PADDY..." he slowly turned to him...Paddy could see the tear rolling down Aaron's cheek, " I think about him all the time...Jackson...AND then I see meself...giving him that...it were at his lips, his mouth...I CAN'T STOP THINKING WHAT MIGHT OF HAPPENED..."

"but it never though...did it..." told Paddy, " Aaron mate...you REALLY are going to have to get OVER this...because if you don't I'll..."

"KICK ME OUT!..." snapped Aaron, " BECAUSE SHE wants me out!"

Paddy could see how distressed Aaron really was...HE DID have mood swings...MORE than usual, that was to be expected...he knew deep down Aaron would find it difficult to come to terms with it...

Paddy was shaking his head at him, he wanted to make this as clear as possible, " I would...NEVER...kick you out Aaron..."

Aaron's eyes were red with his crying...he looked up at Paddy, " I know you hate him...BUT...I miss him Paddy...I miss him...but I am starting to hate him for doing this to me"

Paddy found it hard to swallow, he was dead against Aaron even SEEING Jackson again, let alone talk to him...it just would bring out the WORST in him, " IT...WILL...get easier..."

"when..." asked Aaron staring to his pillow.

"In time...YOU can't fall out of love...JUST like that...it hurts...but you will learn to live with it...move on..." told Paddy.

Aaron nodded...THIS WHOLE THING was messing EVERYONES live up, Paddy was right...he always was...HE just needed to move on properly, not keep thinking about what MIGHT have happened...and wallow in the past.

He looked up at Paddy,some sincerity in his gaze " I'll get meself sorted out, I promise...I know you'll not gonna approve...nor will Mum but...I HAVE TO GO SEE HIM...Jackson I mean...tell him WE'RE OVER for good..." he felt choked up again, " I'm just scared he'll just go wanting to die again..."

Paddy rarely felt a disregard to anyone...but AARON and HIS welfare was his FIRST concern, "AS AWFUL AS this sounds...I don't care...that's NOT your problem...IT'S his Mums...I'm sure they're be professional help out there for her...AND him..."

Aaron sniffed, and pulled himself together, " I crashed a car...in a field...Cain's well pissed at me...SACKED me!...I've gotta go sort that out..."

"Do you want ME to go and have a word..." asked Paddy, as helpful as always...

Aaron shook his head, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie, " nah...I'LL sort it...I PROMISE PADS...I'LL PULL ME SOCKS UP..."

Paddy smiled, and left him to clean himself up, Aaron went to the mirror to examine his injuries...the blood congealed and dried up, he then lowered his gaze to Jackson's photo nearby...and his gaze hit sadly to the floor...

before he lashed out ...the picture crashing into the wall...falling to a 100 pieces.

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews...this chapter 8, as always I love your input...who knows your ideas may go into it... XX

PS: I'll be uploading the latest chapter to my other story tomorrow...x

Aaron nodded...THIS WHOLE THING was messing EVERYONES live up, Paddy was right...he always was...HE just needed to move on properly, not keep thinking about what MIGHT have happened...and wallow in the past.

He looked up at Paddy,some sincerity in his gaze " I'll get meself sorted out, I promise...I know you'll not gonna approve...nor will Mum but...I HAVE TO GO SEE HIM...Jackson I mean...tell him WE'RE OVER for good..." he felt choked up again, " I'm just scared he'll just go wanting to die again..."

Paddy rarely felt a disregard to anyone...but AARON and HIS welfare was his FIRST concern, "AS AWFUL AS this sounds...I don't care...that's NOT your problem...IT'S his Mums...I'm sure they're be professional help out there for her...AND him..."

Aaron sniffed, and pulled himself together, " I crashed a car...in a field...Cain's well pissed at me...SACKED me!...I've gotta go sort that out..."

"Do you want ME to go and have a word..." asked Paddy, as helpful as always...

Aaron shook his head, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie, " nah...I'LL sort it...I PROMISE PADS...I'LL PULL ME SOCKS UP..."

Paddy smiled, and left him to clean himself up, Aaron went to the mirror to examine his injuries...the blood congealed and dried up, he then lowered his gaze to Jackson's photo nearby...and his gaze hit sadly to the floor...

before he lashed out ...the picture crashing into the wall...falling to a 100 pieces.

THE NEXT DAY

Aaron strolled over the lawn into Smithy cottage...on opening the door, he could see Paddy in the lounge looking after baby leo, " Aaron...you'll back early...I take it that..."

"NO Paddy...Debbie doesn't think it's a good idea..."

Paddy hurried over to him as Aaron tried to make himself a brew, "maybe just give it a few days...I'm sure once the dusts settled...they'll be okay with yah..."

Aaron turned and sighed at him, " I DON'T really care paddy...it's JUST some poxy job at a village garage...IT'S not exactly a big loss is it..."

Paddy was rocking Leo, " oh Aaron...IT'S SO MUCH MORE than that...you know you'll be gutted NOT to go back..."

Aaron had changed his mind about the brew, he threw the mug back into the sink, "IF you say so...BUT quiet frankly I'm past caring...SOD this I'm off for a pint..."

Aaron stormed out the door, Paddy called out after him but the door had slammed shut before Aaron could even hear him.

Rhona came in from the vet's inter connect, her face was knowing to him, " see...THIS is what i've been saying to you all along paddy...HE'S really got to go...he was fine last night granted...but today...THE ATTITUDE returns...no I've decided Paddy it's HIM or ME..."

Jackson was in his chair, Hazel had just finished feeding him his breakfast, when the phone rang, she shoved a tissue in Jackson's mouth, and lept up to answer it, " hello...THIS is SHE..." she announced with emthusiasism, " That will be good...please E mail them to me...SOUNDS PERFECT...thank you so much for getting back to me so quickly Mr. Harper...thanks again, BYE!"

Jackson looked up at her, " errrrrr..." he murmured through the tissue, Hazel was rubbing her hands together, "that was that Mr Harper from the council...he's lined us up for some viewings on Monday...ohhhhhh, we could me moving out of here quicker than we thought!", the relief in her tone of voice was very clear, and even though Jackson felt it was all moving so quick...his main concern was her...IT had to be...

Hazel seemed to see the tissue in his mouth for the first time, and removed it, " greeaat Mum...SOUNDS LIKEA PLAN!..." he said full of exaggerated joy.

Hazel started to wipe Jackson's mouth, and clear up the plate, " best go and see Declan later...tell him what we're planning to do..."

Jackson nodded at her, " yep! BEST DO!...don't want him to be finding out from anyone else DO we!"

Hazel stared into space smiling, clutching the tray, " yeah...yah right..." she then looked down to him, " this IS alright by you...I mean I know I've been GOING ON AND ON about it..."

Jackson swallowed hard, and looked up, his eyes smiling at her warmly, " IF it makes YOU happy mum...THEN EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT BY ME...Now...best be getting that washing up done, before them plates cake over..."

Hazel smiled at him, and hurried up the stairs, Jackson breathed out a deep sigh he'd been keeping in...it seemed keeping his mum happy was his only sole purpose in life now...

At the pub, Aaron was at the bar supping his pint, Chas came over and leaned on the pump, "hey...WHY don't you just GO over there, and ASK for yah job back.."

Aaron sighed out, " did THAT this morning, Debbie doesn't think it's a sound idea, especially with THAT farmer owner wanting compo for the damage I caused with that fence...so THAT'S that...end of"

Chas pulled him a frown, " and YOU are gonna let her talk down to yah like that...ASK Cain...he'll give her what for..."

Aaron downed his pint, " MUM...Cain were there...HE'S backing her...and I don't blame him either...I MESSED UP...I will again!...I know I will...just leave it will yah..."

Chas looked over as Declan came to the bar, Chas went and served him, then came back to Aaron, " ohhhhhh I suppose I can find yah some work round here...stop yah going idle..."

Her smile faded...as Hazel breezed into the pub...instantly Chas's tongue was at the side of her cheek...her back up.

Hazel came to the bar...and even though she could feel the hostility arradiating out from Chas, she wasn't going to rise to it,nothing was going to spoil her happiness now...she smiled, " white wine please Chas..."

Chas was silent...and poured out her drink...Aaron glanced over at Hazel, " alright Hazel...how's..." he could see Chas glaring at him, " how's...things..."

Hazel reached for her purse, " looking up...especially with the news we had today..."

Aaron swallowed, he WANTED to know the news, " what news..."

"yes TELL us..." said Chas sarcastically, " I'm sure it's riviting..."

Hazel looked from one face to the other, " well...just that...ME and Jackson will be leaving the village..." she stared up at Chas watching for a reaction, "you're be PLEASED to hear, WE'LL be outta your hair sooner 'nuff..." she then spotted Declan reading the newspaper in the corner, she picked up her glass, " and he's JUST the man I want to see..."

Chas shook her head in contempt, " the nerve of HER!...breezing in here without a care in the world...ALL what SHE and that son of her's did to YOU", Aaron didn't respond...infact when Chas looked round there was nothing but an empty beer glass on the bar...Aaron had gone.

Aaron stormed out the Woolpack, and marched across the road towards Dale head, he failed to spot the john deer tractor pull up and come to a stop across the road from the garage...it's driver looking across to Aaron...

Jackson was sitting in his chair reading a page on the web, he sighed and called out "next page..." the screen changed...the front door then swung open, Jackson snapped his head round...his blank expression instantly moving to a half smile, " Aaron..."

Aaron closed the door and looked at him...blue eyes gazing at him...Jackson turned his chair round, " so...is this a flying visit..." he said with a smile, trying to break the ice...then Jackson noticed Aaron's face, " blimey!...what's happened to you..."

"IS IT TRUE..." Aaron blurted out.

Jackson was a little taken aback with the tone, " oh...YOU'VE seen me Mum...trust her NOT to keep her trap shut hey!" he said.

"SO...you are then...MOVING!" asked Aaron, hands deep in his hoodie pockets.

Jackson looked to the floor, " yeah...WE have too...for me mums sake...she can't be living here..." he looked around him...until he focused his brown eyes onto Aaron, " in this house..."

Aaron nodded slightly, understanding THAT reason...he glanced toward THAT wall...the wall where he had chucked the death drink at THAT day.

Jackson followed his gaze...he knew...but he didn't say anything, instead, hesitantly, he looked up to Aaron, " so...the cuts on yah face...HAD a disagreement with anyone I know..."

Aaron shook his head at him, " that'll be right...YOU think I've been in a fight...TRUST YOU...TRUST YOU to go thinking that..."

Jackson hated the anger in Aaron's tone, " Aaron please...I'm sorry...I wasn't thinking that...i were just messing with yah..."

Aaron backed away to the door, " I shouldn't have come...but now I'm here...good luck...with the move...I HOPE you'll be happy..." he then turned to open the door...he paused, sensing Jackson wanting to reply...and he did so.

"Aaron...please...CAN we still be friends...you know...in case we bump into eachother OUT and ABOUT..." Jackson was now facing the wall, eyes closed...mouth open waiting for his response...hoping it would be...

"yeah...if you want...who knows...might see you around town...in the clubs and that..." Aaron said facing the front door...his eyes closed now.

Jackson let out a small laugh, " yeah...I'll be the guy in the corner who no one wants owt to do with...except me mates of course...but once it's time for the slow dances...NOBODY wants a cripple..."

"DON'T!" snapped Aaron, he turned and looked at him...his eyes threaten to tear up, "JUST DON'T do that..." he then was out the door...it banged shut behind him, Jackson let out a gasp and burst into sobs...frustrated sobs...his mind was out there chasing after him...but his body...it were still stuck in that chair...

Aaron left Dale head upset, he hurried himself round the corner and stopped off at the wall where he crouched himself down and let out his sobs...he wiped his tears away to see someone talking to Debbie inside the garage...then noticed the john deer tractor parked across the road...it seemed familiar somehow...

The land owner was no doubt asking for his compo...he cringed and stood up...but then noticed it wasn't the land owner at all...it was a young lad...a young lad his age...the very young lad whom been driving the tractor he nearly ploughed into...

and went to offer his help...after the crash.

Debbie had spotted Aaron and was on her way over with the lad, " Aaron...glad you've come skulking around here...this is Callum...he's the son of the farmer whose fense you trashed..."

Aaron swallowed hard, looking up to Debbie...but he briefly kept glancing toward Callum, "HE'S managed to talk his father round...smooth things over...we're gonna come to an arrangement..."

Aaron pulled a face at her, " what sort of arrangement..."

"PAYING FOR THE REPAIR JOB!..." cried Debbie, wondering IF Aaron was actually bothered, she then noticed his red eyes, " Have you been crying..."

Aaron bolted his head up, and glared at her as to say, 'AS IF', " NOO!..."

Debbie smiled at him, " well, the plan is...YOU'VE got yah job back...but YOUR wages are gonna be paying for the repairs to the fence..."

Aaron glanced up at Callum...the lad had his hands in his overalls pockets and he was smiling at him, " what about Cain...HE might have something to say..."

"I'll deal with me dad...YOU CAN start back tomorrow..." she turned to Callum, " Thanks...tell your father we're sort out everything..."

Callum nodded at her, " will do..." he nodded toward Aaron, " glad yah face is all healed up..."

Aaron dug his hands into his pockets and walked off in a huff...he glared up at the tractor, Callum was at his side, " wanna ride in it..." he teased.

Aaron glared at him, " what IS IT with you...WHY are you being so nice...I nearly wiped your arse off the road when we LAST met..."

Callum shrugged, " just being friendly...look..." he cleared his throat, " I've seen you around...DOWN TOWN LIKE...", Aaron noticed the knowing look, he shrugged, "yeah so..."

"thought you'd like to come out with me..." Callum asked.

Aaron looked toward the garage, conscious of being watched, " and WHY would I be wanting to do that..." he asked, eyebrowes pulled together.

Callum climbed back into his tractor and looked down to him, " UP to you...I'm not gonna force yah...just a thought really...as I said I've seen you about...not for a while mind, you used to be with that older guy with the beard..." he frowned, " come to think about it...haven't seen him around either..."

Aaron bit his lip thinking...the idea of going out, turning over and over in his mind..."look...alright...I'll see you in Bar west for a drink...JUST as an apology like...for nearly killing yah...that's all", Callum handed Aaon his phone, " stick yah number in that...", Aaron did, and handed it back to him.

Callum smiled at him, and put on his cap, " alright cool...I'll call yah..." and with that Callum had turned the engine, and the tractor noisey came to life,and chuggered off up the road.

Aaron stared after it...he half smiled...but he wondered why he was...because he then looked back towards Dale head.

It didn't matter how he felt...THAT didn't matter anymore...he had to move on...get some new friends...meet people...and this was a good enough start as any...

and regardless how he felt...at least Paddy and his Mum would be happy...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews...lots of different opinions...it seems everyone wants a fling between Aaron and Callum..I can do that!...but I hope it doesn't drive him away from Jackson even further...but then again maybe it will be Jackson who'll be the one doing the Heart breaking ;)this is chapter 9, as always I LOVE your input, thoughts and ideas...

It was Saturday...Aaron Livesy sat on the doorstep to Smithy cottage, puffing on his first ciggy of the day, he yawned and sighed at the sound of baby Leo crying inside, and Rhona getting all bad tempered over it...Paddy was getting well stressed over it too...and then there was Marlon in the mix.

Aaron was getting fed up with ALL of it, these sleepless nights were getting on top of him, he stood up and was about to go back inside, when he saw a car pull up outside Dale head...it was Jerry...WHAT the hell was HE doing here, he watched Jackson's dad get out the car and hurried to the front door...Hazel answered...Aaron made sure he wasn't seen...ANY protential hassle from HIM was the last thing he needed...

Inside, Aaron closed the door and went into the kitchen, where a behagged Rhona was preparing Leo's milk, she turned and face him, her face red and her hair scraped back, "can you go and help Paddy with Leo...he should of stopped him from crying by now!...", Aaron was about to pull a face at her as to say, THAT'S MY PROBLEM BECAUSE...but thought against it...he knew he was on rocky territory with Rhona with his attitude of late.

Aaron went through into the lounge and saw Paddy rocking the crying baby in his arms, Aaron stepped over, " let me..." he sighed, and instantly, once the screaming baby was in the teenagers arms, it stopped crying, Paddy was always open mouthed in surprize when this happened...Aaron of all people, getting a baby to stop crying.

" HOW do you DO that!" asked Paddy, Aaron rocked the baby in his arms gently, and looked up with a smirk, " I good with them arn't I...I MUST have the knack...Josh used to stop crying when I..." he was handing the baby back to Paddy at the thought of Jackson' s baby half brother, Paddy gently put Leo into his crip, " THANKS for that Aaron,at least now Rhona can have a nice lie down ..."

Rhona was at the door, " WHAT are you doing...I said stop him from CRYING...not rock him to sleep..." she held up the bottle, " I'VE BEEN WASTING ME TIME MAKING THIS!" she cried in frustration...Paddy felt bad, but Aaron wasn't having it...he glared at her, and he KNEW this wasn't going to do him any favours, " JUST LAY OFF him will yah...you just like having a GO at him don't yah!...IT'S ME who got him off to sleep NOT Paddy, so blame me..." he was pointing a finger at himself, and leaned into her, " AS if I care if you DO!" he then stormed off, Rhona shook her head at Paddy, " it's time Paddy...THAT was the last straw...as I said HIM or ME...you've got today to make UP your mind..."

Paddy sighed, as Rhona went back into the kitchen.

Aaron had been through SO much...how was he gonna be able to kick him out...but the way Rhona was handing out threats to leave her self, WHAT choice was he left with...

Over at Dale Head, Jerry sat on the chair next to Jackson, who laid in his pyjamas on his bed, "so YOU NOT looking forward to the footie then..." Jerry asked, sipping a brew Hazel had made him, Jackson turned his head, " what..."

" YOU...YOU'VE had a face like a slapped arse since I got here..." told Jerry, Jackson raised his eyebrowes at him, " NOBODY asked you to stop by..." he said flippantly.

Jerry stood up," I'm NOT putting up with this...I booked them tickets especially...just YOU and me...well I suppose HE can come if you want him too...NOT that I'd get a CHOICE mind..."

Jackson looked to the wall...he felt sick...the thought of TELLING his dad that he and Aaron were over...had been for 2 weeks, the SMUGGNESS on his face...him being ALL pleased that his GAY son had NO partner in toe...to course him shame.

Hazel came down the stairs with a tee towel...she was about to ask Jerry if he wanted another brew, when he saw the brochere's on the side, " what's this..." he said, picking them up, Hazel and Jackson quickly glanced at eachother...but Jerry wasn't stupid, " ARE you moving house..."

Hazel nodded, with a quick flash of a smile, " yeah...a change is good as a rest..."

"DON'T BE giving me that old bollox, it's the rent here isn't it...HAS it gone up...can't you pay it...DO YOU WANT ME to have a word with THAT landlord..." questioned Jerry impatiently.

" Ohhhh JERRY.." started Hazel, " WHY do you have to go question everything WE do...", Jerry glared at her, " JUST MAYBE I have GOOD reason to...the amount of things you've hidden from me in the past...SO..." he turned and leaned over his son, " WHAT does your precious Aaron think about all this..." he leaved through the brocheres, " half of THESE places are in town...it's gonna be a bit of a chore for HIM to go visiting yah..."

Jackson looked up at him, " dad...Aaron and me...we're...we're..."

"you're what..." hissed Jerry, starting to second guess what he was trying to say, " Aaron and me...I HAVE decided we are better off as JUST mates...IT'S not easy on him...for him...", Jackson told, trying to make out he was okay with it, but failing.

Jerry was NOT happy, " he's FLAMING walked hasn't he..." he spat, Jackson glanced to his mum for support, she stepped forward, " it's NOT like that Jerry...Jackson's DOING this FOR Aaron...Aaron didn't want to go...did he love..." she was shaking her head at Jackson, urging him to continue.

Jackson was shaking his head, " I TOLD HIM to go...not come back...he's young...GOT his whole life in front of him...WHY would I WANT to saddle him down to me..."

Jerry perched himself onto the bed, and faced his son, " well...maybe it's for the best...he wasn't good enough for you anyway...YOU'VE got more to worry about than to WORRY over him..." he smiled, " I can't hide the fact though...I'm chuffed to bits..."

Jackson's gaze hit to his chest...THAT hurt...his dad thinking that of Aaron...HIS Aaron...chuffed that he and him were no longer together...

Jerry stood up, slapping his hands together, " right LET'S get to that ground yeah...AT least I get a good spot to view the game, THIS time round..."

Hazel glanced at Jerry, shaking her head, " Jerrreeee...stop it..."

Jackson shook his head, and looked up to her, " It's okay mum...he's only messing..."

Hazel sighed, and reached for the hoist, " well then...suppose we better get you dressed, AND in that chair then..."

Aaron meanwhile sat on the bench opposite Leyla's shop, he stared to the ground before Adam came up to him, " alright mate..."

Aaron looked up, the bright sunlight nearly blinding is view, " I thought you were busy..." he said.

Adam sat next to him, " I thought I were, but I'm..."

Aaron smiled at him, " Oh I see...Ella's busy is she...I TELLING YAH...it's gonna all end in tears mate..."

Adam shrugged, " guess that's MY risk to take mate..." he turned to him, " what about you...got any plans this weekend...or is THIS it...sitting here staking out the shop..."

Aaron sat back, " no...thought I might go into town...", Adam licked his lip, " TOWN...ohhh you'll not gonna get bladdered like LAST time are yah..."

Aaron snapped his head round, " NO!..." he then turned to see Jerry stroll toward the shop, "urghh, THAT'S all I need!"

But before Aaron could sneak off, Jerry had already spotted him, Aaron couldn't help notice the pleased expression plastered on his face, " SO...my son saw the light did he...AND told you to go DO ONE..."

Aaron could feel the anger arise from the pit of his stomach, he stood up, and pointed to him, " YOU know NOWT about it!"

Adam stood up, concerned that something might erupt between them, Jerry aprroached them, " Jackson told me...HE said that he got SHOT of yah because he wanted you to have a life...but do you know what I think...the REAL reason I mean...DEEP down he knew you WOULDN'T last the pace..."

Aaron was angry, " shut yah mouth!" he snapped, but Jerry couldn't help but smirk...until he heard someone shriek over, " WHAT'S kicking off here!"

Aaron looked up to see Chas stepping over from the pub, " Mum...just LEAVE IT..!" ordered Aaron.

Chas stood in the road staring at Jerry, " I HOPE you're not upsetting MY Aaron...NOT AFTER WHAT your SON put him through...", Adam, who still stood beside Aaron could detect bitteress in her tone.

Jerry turned, " WHAT...Jackson!...I THINK you'd FIND it's the other WAY round love..!"

"WHAT!"...", this really riled up Chas, " YOU'VE NOT been told the HALF of it MATE!"

Aaron's anger instantly turned to a pleading, " MUM NO!...please...", Chas turned toward her son...she really couldn't understand WHY her son was still protecting him...Jackson.

"BUT they can't be talking to you like that!" she reasoned.

Aaron nodded, " no...just leave it...ALL OF YAH..." he then stormed off, heading back toward Smithy, Chas glared at Jerry, " YOU just stay away from MY son, do you hear me!..."

Jerry returned the glare, " well, as long as he stays away from Jackson...YOU'VE got nowt to worry about..."

Chas started to head back to the pub, " count on it!...BELIEVE ME...YOUR SON is the LAST person I want near MY SON..."

Jerry watched her go...there was something wierd going on...he couldn't put his finger on it, but he felt like he was being kept in the dark about something.

Aaron laid back onto his bed and sighed, HE hated the thought of Jerry being so smug about him and Jackson splitting up...IF only he KNEW why...that would wipe that stupid smirk off his face...but for Jackson's sake...he was going to keep his trap shut.

His thoughts were interrupted by his mobile jingling into life, he reached into his pocket and looked at the display from where he laid upon his pillow...it was Callum...

Aaron's heart raced...it had been 3 days since they spoke at the garage...he bit his lip...the phone threatening to pass on to voicemail, he quickly answered it, " alright..."

As the evening wore on, Aaron came down the stairs to Smithy all tarted up...as he went to grab his house keys, he caught a glance of himself in the mirror...the gelled hair...the tight black sweatshirt...the overpowering scent...Paddy was then standing at the doorway, "blimey...have you gone and raided boots or something ..." he soothed in jest.

Aaron turned, " I'm off out..." he headed to the door, Paddy turned, " Aaron wait...I...I was meaning to have a chat to yah earlier..."

Aaron turned,his blue eyes showing Paddy HE knew exactly what he was going to say, "Rhona STILL wants me out...fine...I'll get it sorted...oh , and don't wait up..." Paddy stepped out onto the doorstep in his fluffy slippers, " Aaron wait...where are you gonna go..."

Aaron waved his arm at him, his other hand firmly in his pocket, " DON'T worry about it Paddy...as I said...IT'S my problem NOT yours..." he then lept away toward the bus stop.

Aaron sat on the bench at the bus stop, and glanced at his watch...the next bus was due in about 10 minutes...and it would get him into town for 7...he sighed and turned to see the 'disabled' taxi pull up out side Dale head...Jerry was getting out the cab, and within a few moments, Jackson was out the cab in his chair...both him and his dad wearing their footie scarfs, no prizes for guessing where they'd spent the afternoon...Jackson was smiling...and his dad was laughing...obviously HE was having a great time with out him...

The bus was then pulling up, as it stopped, Aaron looked toward Dale head...Jerry and Jackson had already gone indoors...he bit his lip, before jumping onto the bus and paying his fare...

Callum stood at the bar, as lady Gaga was blaring out on the speakers, he had ordered his pint...and glanced into the mirror to make sure he was looking good, Aaron didn't sound that enthusiastic on the phone earlier, but then again Aaron seemed the mean and moody type...a quality that he found alluring.

Aaron climbed the steps, and saw Callum standing with his back to him at the bar...he paused and bit his bottom lip, WAS this really what he wanted...a drink with another bloke...he through his hand over his shaven head trying to decide...but the decision was taken out of his hands...Callum had seen him.

"Aaron..." Callum said, beaming a smile, Aaron slowly came to his side at the bar, " hi...sorry i'm late...the erm..the bus it..."

Callum waved his hand, " doesn't matter...YOU'LL here now, that's all that counts..." he pointed to his ale, " I didn't know WHAT you supped so...I never standed one for yah...BUT I'll get you one now..."

Aaron nodded, and leaned on the bar, " great...bottle of best'll do me..."

After handing over the bottle, Callum nodded toward the booth, " do you wanna sit...", Aaron glanced over to the booth...he once sat there with Jackson...his stomach was doing somersorts..." nahhh...standing here's okay..."

There was an awkward silence...both of them looking away to the crowds, Callum cleared his throat, and turned his head to Aaron, " so...do you dance..."

Aaron glared at him, " errrrrr...NEVER"

Callum got the message...blimey this Aaron was abit tense...maybe this wasn't a great idea, " well...errr...YOU don't have to stay with me tonight if you don't wanna..."

Aaron snapped his head around...the look of shock on his face, " STAY TONIGHT!"

Callum smiled, realising Aaron had got the wrong end of the stick, " no...I mean here...you can do yah own thing if you want...you don't have to hang around me..."

Aaron looked confused now, " what...are you saying you don't want me hanging round yah now..."

Callum shook his head, " nooo mate...look chill yeah...what's got into yah...are you ALWAYS this hetup..."

Aaron knew he was in danger of ruining the night, he pulled an apologetic sigh, " sorry...look..." he nodded toward the pool table, and gazed at him, " do yah play..."

Callum raised his eyes browes, taking a sup of his ale, " not much...but I'LL let you be my teacher..." he said...there was alittle teasing in his tone.

Aaron snatched up his bottle of beer, and lead the way through the crowd, Callum followed him.

In the village, Paddy stood at the bar, Chas was serving him, " So if SHE'S making you chuck him OUT...where's he supposed to go..." she asked, annoyed with Paddy for letting that happen, Paddy bit his lip, " what about your place, maybe he could have the couch...", Paddy knew that was wrong, by the look of Chas's expression, " ohhh, JUST leave it to me...I'll THINK of something...anyway where is he tonight...coming in later is he..."

Paddy shrugged, as he clutched his pint, " shouldn't think so...he's gone off into town..."

Chas's look brightened up, " ohhhh THAT'S good...getting himself out and about...WE should encourage him to do MORE of that..." Paddy noticed the face suddenly drop, "oh here we go..."

Paddy turned to see Jerry walk in, Hazel and Jackson were in tow, she watched with a scowl, as Hazel grabbed a seat in the corner, where Jackson parked up beside in his chair, Jerry came to the bar, Chas pulled on a FALSE smile, " and WHAT can I get yahs..."

"two pints, one with a straw, and a white wine..." returned Jerry, not knowing how to take Chas, Paddy was standing awkardly beside him, " WHY don't you go and sit down...I'll bring them over..." told Chas with another put on smile, Jerry nodded, and with a quick glance at Paddy, went back to his seat.

"WHAT are you up to Chas..." asked Paddy, knowing her too well, Chas placed the drinks on a tray, and came to his side of the bar, "just being polite Paddy...I can DO polite...when I feel like it..." she then made for the table, " I can be a right bitch as well..." she muttered, but before Paddy could stop her, Chas was over to their table, "there you go...2 beers...one with a straw...and a white wine..."

Hazel looked up at her and pulled a face, " WHAT have we done to get a smile out of you...", Chas looked up, " excuse me love?...OHHHH, it's just that I happy for my little Aaron tonight that's all..." she then turned her gaze to Jackson, who was staring up at her with his big brown eyes, " HE'S gone into town...HAVING a great night...who knows if he'll come home tonight...", Jackson's gaze suddenly darted toward the floor, Hazel noticed and glared at her, " CHAS...!" she warned, Jerry however smiled up at her, " well WISH him a good night from us...NOT that ANYBODY here cares WHERE yah son is...and who with"

Chas craddled the tray, " well...ENJOY yah drinks..." she then smuggly went back behind the bar, Paddy shook his head at her, " Chas WAS that REALLY necessary..."

Chas smiled at him, " I THINK it was...now", she went over to Betty and Edna, "what can I get you ladies..."

Hazel, Jackson and Jerry sat in silence, Jerry kept trying to bring a conversation about the footie up, but Jackson was not in a talkative mood, " he'll JUST be out with friends love..." Hazel suddenly said, looking at her son sadly, Jackson's gaze was still troubled and still was looking to the carpet, " it doesn't matter mum...Aaron can do what he wants..." he looked up, and hinted a smile at her, " he's a free agent...I'm HAPPY for him...getting out there...getting a life...", Hazel knew her son too well, Jackson was FAR from alright about this, but before she could say owt else, Jerry downed his pint, " WELL...Eileen will be having the search party out for me now..." he stood up, and looked down to his son, " chin up son...I'll see yah next week...I'll bring Josh to see yah..."

Jackson sadly smiled up at him, " cheers dad...see yah..." Jerry nodded at him, then at Hazel, then was out the door, Jackson's smile faded and he withdrew into himself, Hazel didn't know what to say now just: " we'll go after we have these yeah..."

Jackson nodded his head in disinterest, " yeah..."

Aaron and Callum played a few games of pool, and Aaron beat him every time...at first, Aaron had remained his moody self...but he did start to relax in Callum's company...

As the last game came to an end, Callum glanced at his watch, " hey mate...I'm gonna have to shoot...some of us have gotta work tomorrow..."

Aaron pulled a face, as he leaned his poolstick up against the wall, " what!...but it's sunday..."

Callum shrugged at him, " IT'S a FAMILY run farm...me dad says there's ALOT to catch up on...especially with the wheat..."

Aaron rolled his eyes, as they made their way toward the bar, " SOUNDS riviting!...but SPARE me the details of farming...me mate Adam's a farmer...and he's pretty dull..." he teased.

Callum lead the wat towards the exit, " oh yeah! so you are calling me dull are yah..."

Aaron laughed as they reached the street outside, the night had turned warm and damp, Callum then laughed, " SO...my place is a few miles away from the village, but i guess we could share a cab...if you want..."

They did, and both sat in the back of the cab...the narrow lanes, flying by in the dark outside the back windows, Callum hated when the silence developed, just the noise of the cabbies radio crackling to life, he turned to Aaron, " so...doing owt next week, we could do this again...I mean...YOU don't have too..."

Aaron bit his lip, and turned his head, from where he was leaning up against the glass, " you'll just have to give me a call and find out then..." he told with a half smirk.

When the cab pulled into the village, Aaron paid Callum his half of the ride, and went to get out, Callum grabbed his knee, "HOPE to see yah again...I'll call yah."

Aaron swallowed hard, eyeing the hand on his knee, Callum removed it quickly...Aaron then just nodded, and jumped out, and watched the cab drive off.

Aaron forced his hands into his jeans pockets, and strolled up toward Smithy cottage, he couldn't help but look in the direction of Dale head...and then found himself moving toward it, the blinds were down, but the low light was on, Aaron knew where to look...there was a bit of blind where it was bent up slightly, Aaron peered through to see Jackson on his bed...the TV was on...and it looked like he was in his Pyjama's, he then heard him laugh out loud, he was watching some comedy, then his head turned and he yelled out, "MUM...what's keeping yah!...yah missing it!...MUM!", he laughed again at the comedy, Aaron came back from the window and felt choked up...at least he seemed happy...and he hated that...he was laughing...he was happy without him...he then headed back up to smithy cottage, feeling that maybe it was just better for EVERYONE that they were moving away...Jackson...the man he still loved more than ever ...would then be out of sight...and then hopefully...out of mind...and he can get on with his life...

Jackson laid upon his bed, and stared toward the blinds, he pulled a face, what had drawn his attention there he didn't know...he pulled another face, and settled his gaze toward Aaron's picture on the side...he was OUT tonight...and his thoughts come back...the comedy helping to take his mind off...but he HAD to face facts, Aaron was moving on with his life...he was starting to forget about him...he just WISHED he could do the same...

...but because of the way he felt...that he loved Aaron SO much...it was gonna be differcult...maybe when they moved house...maybe THEN...things would get better for him...

...because it couldn't be much worse...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews...

"I really didn't think YOU were gonna give me a call..." told Callum, as he tucked into his kebab, Aaron strolled beside him on the street in Hotten...they had just spent a second night out together at Bar West...Callum hoped to see Aaron again...and Aaron CALLED HIM...that was a good sign, Aaron looked up, " well...you're not a bad bloke really...are yah...", Callum could detect a hint of a smile in there...Aaron would RARELY smile...he was definatly the moody type...but there was something else...something he shut him out of.

Callum didn't want to press him though, whatever happened to Aaron had sorely upset him, and he was best to let it alone for now.

Callum perched on the wall...Aaron sat next to him...both munching on their kebabs, the silence was getting too lengthly again, so Callum spoke up, " so ...ermm...there's this sorta party I'm going to tomorrow like...would you like to come...with us like..."

Aaron swallowed his mouthful, and simply replied with a shrug...and a:, "can do..."

Callum laughed at him, "hey...don't be getting TOO excited about it!", Aaron smirked, "sorry...yeah sounds top that..."

Callum bit his lip, and shyed away a smile, " I'll text yah the details...where to meet up and stuff..."

Aaron nodded his head, " sound..." and as he looked at him, Callum turned his head...they were face to face...sitting on the wall...Aaron bit his lip, focusing his gaze to Callum's mouth...then up to his eyes...Callum didn't know whether this was a signal or not...but VERY slowly went to move forward, but Aaron jumped off the wall, and tossed his kebab rubbish into a nearby bin, " look gotta go...text me..." he then hurried off up the street, pulling up his hood, Callum gazed after him...already looking forward to see him again, tomorrow night...

The next day, Aaron Livesy had moved his stuff into the Woolpack...it wasn't ideal, but Rhona had made it crystal clear to Paddy that she had wanted him OUT of Smithy cottage.

Diane was in the back room having a brew, when Chas brought in Aaron, " there...It's all done...all his stuff up in THAT bedroom..." Chas informed, Diane shook her head, "good...welcome lad, BUT I can't help wondering why Rhona wanted him out of the Paddy's place though..."

Aaron plonked himself onto the sofa with a big sigh, he could see Chas was having trouble with an excuse, so HE made one up, " it's ME...I'm were getting tired and narky...you know, with THAT baby screaming all day and all night..."

Diane tilted her head, as she clutched her mug, " well...IT'S a sprog free zone here pet...but I can't promise yah a quiet time here you know...", Aaron shook his head, as his gaze hit the floor, " believe me...here's fine...it's fine..."

Diane left them to it and went to run the bar, Chas took the opportunity to sit next to Aaron on the sofa, " SO..." she cooed.

Aaron turned his head, "so ...what..."

"YOU...and your night out...last night...how did it go...it was just Paddy said you were ALL tarted up like..."

Aaron rolled his eyes, " that's GOT nowt to do with you...OR HIM for that matter...", Chas raised her hands in defense, " it's OKAY kid, I happy for yah...it's time to MOVE on...put ALL 'THAT' behind yah..."

Aaron nodded his head, and turned his gaze away, " it were okay...BUT that's ALL yah getting..." he stood and moved to the door, " I'm gonna grab a shower...and THEN I might go into the front for a drink, before I GO OUT again...IF THAT'S ALRIGHT by you..."

Chas nodded with a happy smile, she was SO glad he seemed happier...not SO stressed and confused...it was SURE a good sign for him to be going out...and as soon as THEY across the road were gone...the better...

Later, Aaron came out to the bar and settled down into the corner with a pint, Paddy then came in and sighted him at the table, " Aaron...how are yah settling in..."

Aaron looked up to Paddy, " fine thanks...no THANKS to Rhona mind...mardy cow"

"she's just knackered...she never got any sleep again LAST night...bet that couch over yah mums was a godsend..." Paddy told.

Aaron pulled a face at him, " do I look as IF i care whether THAT cow got any sleep or not...", his hardened face softened, when Hazel put in an appearance at the doors with Jackson in tow, she held the door open as Jackson wheeled in, in his chair.

Paddy glanced at them disapprovingly, Aaron slapped his arm, " oi...what's with the face...", Paddy turned, " I don't want them to go upsetting yah, that's all..."

Aaron pulled another face, "AS IF Paddy..." he supped his pint...but at the same time glared toward Hazel and Jackson.

Hazel placed the brocheres on the table with her drink, " So that wasn't bad was it...THAT last place we saw...that'll do us a treat...even though the grass was a metre long", Jackson was only half listening...he kept glancing to the bar, and then to Aaron...Aaron's glare being forced the other way.

"Jackson...arn't you EVEN gonna bother showing any interest, love..." Hazel sighed.

Jackson turned his head, and instanty gave his mum a teethy grin, " yeah I'M WELL INTERESTED ME...THIS IS ME BEING INTERESTED..."

Hazel rolled her eyes at the sarcasim, but before she could comment, Aaron was upon them with his pint, " alright..." he said in passing.

Jackson looked up at him, face cross between chuffed he came over, and dreading what he was gonna say.

"so..." Aaron pointed to the brocheres, " this THEM places you went to look at...", Hazel shook her head, " yes...we saw some on Monday, and again today..."

Jackson shook his head in dismay, "AND they were all dumps mum...WE are gonna see some MORE on friday...we're NOT gonna be picking the first one we see...", he aimed that comment toward his mother... there was then an awkward silence, before Hazel piped up, "so...how did yah night go..."

Aaron looked at her puzzled, "what night..."

"THE night...last saturday...YOUR mum couldn't WAIT to TELL us all about it...she was practically gloating in fact..." Hazel informed.

Aaron bit his lip, " well...she had no right did she...to tell yous I mean...sorry..."

Jackson looked up at him...and smiled, " you shouldn't be sorry...YOU should be going out"

Aaron focused on Jackson's brown eyes, " what...so you don't mind then..."

Jackson blew out a laugh, " WHY should I be minding...I'M GLAD you're getting out and about...having a laugh and that...ESPECIALLY after ALL what I put you through...you deserve it..."

Aaron downed the dregs of his drink, " so YOU don't mind then..." he mused out loud.

Jackson's gaze hit the floor, " course not...", then Chas spotted THEIR conversation...Aaron huffed and stormed to the bar, " OI...WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU speaking to HIM for!" Chas cried.

Aaron went out back, snatching himself a bag of crisps on the way, " mind you OWN flaming business will yah...!" he then marched up the stairs.

Hazel swallowed the last of her wine down, and looked at her son, " you see love...THIS is WHY we have to move away..."

Jackson nodded his head in dispair, " I know...I just hope that ME and HIM can be friends...in time..."

Hazel stood up, and gathered up the brocheres, " come on let's get yah home...", Chas was then standing there...face like she had been chewing on a wasp, " can't YOU twos just leave me son alone..."

Hazel pointed her finger, " listen here Chas...it were HIM who came up to us...", Paddy came forward...getting in between them both, " that's enough ladies...let's not be saying anything in the heat of them moment..."

Chas turned to him, surprized by the comment, " WHAT!...my Aaron has NOTHING to hide here Paddy...IT'S their little secret!"

Aaron was back down the stairs...he was on his way out for that party, but he could here Hazel mouthing off, " WHY are you doing this...haven't WE ALL been through enough..."

Chas was rising to it, "I'm only getting started love...", Aaron came into the bar and watched as his mum and Hazel had a spate, " oh bring it on...THERE'S nothing else you can do to upset us..." cried Hazel, red faced.

Aaron's gaze set onto Jackson, who sat in the middle defenseless, at first Jackson's eyes were to the carpet, but they then looked up to meet Aaron's...they gazed deep into eachothers eyes as their mothers continues their scrap...Aaron continued to sink into Jackson's gaze, until Hazel had rudely shoved the wheel chair round, " COME ON Jackson...we're leaving...I'm NOT going to STAY here and be insulted ANY longer..."

Aaron watched as Jackson wheeled out the doors, and Hazel followed, Chas collected up the empties, " THE CHEEK of her...THEY caused all THIS...not you...", she aimed this at Aaron, who still stood at the bar, Diane came out from the back, " hey what's going on out here..." she cried, Aaron gave his mum a harsh stare, then after slamming his empty beer glass onto the bar, stormed off, Paddy who had sat down looked up to Chas, " look...maybe it's just BEST we now stay out of it..." he suggested, Chas looked at him, as he had lost his mind, " WHAT are you talking about Paddy...Aaron were talking to them earlier...HOW is he EVER gonna move on when THEY keep popping up all over the shop...I MEAN it Paddy, as soon as THEY go the better!"

Aaron sat at the bus stop...staring toward Dale head...he bit his lip, then focused on his mobile display, Callum had texted him the details of where this house party was being held, he pressed his ok button, and his screen saver came up...Jackson sky diving...he smiled through teary eyes...HIS man...HIS Jackson falling out the sky like some useless lump...but enjoying himself...

Jackson had wanted to die...he had wanted to end his life...

...and he himself had laid awake night after night wishing...WILLING him to change his mind...

...and he did...he did change his mind

so why had he turned against him...

Aaron was forced out of his private thoughts by the bus pulling up at the shelter, Aaron jumped on board and paid...then sat on his seat, watching as the village was left behind...

Later, Aaron was sitting in somebody's lounge...

It was Justin and Martin's house warming...whoever THEY were...and quite frankly he wasn't EVEN BOTHERED either.

Callum chatted to folk about the house...and Aaron sat and sipped from his can...someone had then plonked their backside next to him on the couch, Aaron pulled a face as the guy smiled at him, " Hi...I'm Simon..."

Aaron screwed up his can and burped, "yeah...and you telling ME because...", the blunt comment lost Simon his track of thought, " ermmm...well I..just come to introduce meself like...YOU don't know anyone here so...I mean I know you're with Callum but..."

Aaron snapped...he bolted up, and forced a glare to Simon, " let's GET one thing straight pal...I'm not WITH Callum...you understand me...DO YAH!"

Simon was getting quite nervous...and some others attention was captured to, some whispering...and their chat hidden under the blare of the music.

Callum came into the lounge with his can, " Aaron...are you alright mate..."

Aaron forced his way passed, and found himself in the small narrow hallway to the terranced house...there was two lads sitting on the stairs...one he recognised...he was a mate of Jackson's...his name escaped him...but he heard him say, " I knew he'd bail out on him sooner or later..."

Aaron saw red...he swung around that corner, and grabbed the guy by the scruff of his neck, "WHAT did you say pal!"

The guy looked at him...but wasn't gonna let him intimidate him, " I SAID...I knew YOU would bail out sooner or later...IT'S just like you..."

The lad sitting next to the guy turned, " bail out of what..."

The guy sneered at Aaron, " HE used to go out with a mate of mine Jackson, you know, the one who I told you about...he were paralysed in an accident...I bumped into his mum the other day in the supermarket...said they'd split up...AND now HERE he is seeing someone else..."

Callum came to Aaron's side, " what's going on..."

Aaron glared at the guy, " I remember you...YOU WERE a mate of Jackson's..." the tears welled up, " A GOOD MATE...but WHERE were you when HE had his accident...WHERE the hell were you when HE was LYING HELPLESS in that hospital..." the emotion was starting to ache now...he let go of the guy and stood back, Callum gently put his hands on Aaron's shoulders, "Aaron mate..."

Aaron shook him off, " get off me..." he focused his glare onto the guy, " AND WHAT ABOUT when he came out...WHERE were you then, when he was at home on his own...", the guy started to look riddled with guilt, " I...I...Jackson..." blurted out Aaron, " I love him...I'll NEVER bail out on him..." he then collapsed to his knees sobbing...Callum who knew NOWT about any of it turned, " Aaron...what's..." he tried to touch him again, but Aaron shoved him off, he then stood up and bolted out the front door.

Jackson's mate came forward and stood beside Callum, " I tell you what mate...THAT is one screwed up individual...HE WAS NO good for Jackson...the ONLY reason why Jackson was paralysed...was because of HIM...you've had a lucky escape mate..."

Aaron was running up the street...the tears blurring his vision as he came to a bus stop...he suddenly felt this over whelming feeling of being alone...completely alone...he slid down the bus stop post, and his bum hit the pavement...

Callum was then looking at him from a distance away...he slowly approached and saw Aaron was sobbing, " that guy was a PRATT mate...don't listen to him..."

Aaron looked up at him...eyes saw and red, he was shaking his head, " I never bailed out on him...I NEVER...I would have done it...I WOULD HAVE GONE through with it..." his eyes and voice had a pleading defensive tone.

Callum crouched down and smiled, " look Aaron...you've been pretty screwed up since we met...when you crashed yah car that day...I wish you would open up mate..."

Aaron swallowed, and pulled himself together " look Callum...just stay away from me yeah...just forget you EVER met me..." he then ran off...

Callum stood helpess as he watched Aaron bolt up the street, and disappear around the corner...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews...as always give me your thoughts and opinions where this story should go! xx

Aaron was running...running down that damp narrow road...the tears blocking his vision...all he could hear was that crash...some crash he had heard in the distance...in the dark of that country lane...he ran harder...his heart beat threatening to pound right out of his chest...until he came to the crossing...

...Jackson's van mangled on the side of the track...

...Jackson inside bleeding...hurt...unconscious...

...and then the sirens came and went...as now he stood in a churchyard staring up at Jackson's headstone...he sobbed...and sobbed...before crying out "JACKSON!"

Aaron woke up all sweaty...and his heart was pounding, as he laid in a tangle of sheets in his bedroom at the woolpack.

He swallowed hard trying to rid the thoughts of THAT dream...

He then looked at his bedside clock...it were late in the morning, past 11, the sunlight was sharp behind them curtains.

As he swung his legs round, his mobile jingled into life...it rang...and it rang...he slowly picked it up, and saw _**CALLUM CALLING...**_

Instantly, and without hesitation, he pressed the off key.

He then decided to get up...it was Saturday...no work today...no working for nowt...paying for that flaming fense.

He decided to go grab a shower...

Over the road, the invalid taxi pulled away and Jackson was there sitting in his chair, the door to Dale head opened, and Hazel came hurrying down the slow, " HELLO my little darling...did you enjoy your night at yah fathers...of course I was worried SICK for every minute you were away..."

Jackson looked up to her, "mum, it were just for ONE night...to give you a break, and I hated it...THAT Eileen woman really knows how to go patronising yah..." he then put on an Eileen voice, " ...lets go feed them kids, Josh and Jackson...their mouths are open and ready...here comes the train..."

Hazel shrugged, " well...at least your father won't be ASKING now, for a while will he...he'll stop his banging on now...ASKING when you are going to come and stay..."

Jackson pushed his head back and manouvered up the slope, " yeah...ANYTHING for an peaceful life...I just want to go IN now and grab meself a nap"

Hazel stopped him from going inside, " errrr...well actually...you sorta CAN'T..."

Jackson rolled his eyes, detecting that his mum was hiding something, "what have yah done..."

Hazel gave him a sheepish look, " we've got a visitor..."

Jackson was thin lipped and glided indoors...to come face to face with...JOE, his ex carer.

" HI YA Jackson mate, I were just PASSING through...thought I'd come and see yah...", Jackson's eyes rolled toward his mother, " so NOTHING to do with her ringing yah then..."

Hazel closed the front door and rubbed her hands together, " I go make us all a nice brew shall I"

Joe turned to her, " that'll be very nice Hazel...GIVE us some time for me and happy here to catch up...", Hazel looked all pleased with her self, and disappeared up the stairs, Jackson focused his gaze onto Joe, " so...hows things in SAD little Joe's life then..." he then grinned at him...a grin FULL of sarcasm...

Aaron sat in the woolpack, at the bar...nursing his pint, Diane came out from the back and pulled a sigh at him, " just look at ALL them empties...be a good lad and go collect them for us pet..."

Diane was smiling at him as Aaron looked up...and realising what she had just asked, he slipped off the stall and went and DONE just that...Chas came out and noticed her son doing his chore, "WOW! how did you get him to DO that..." asked Chas intrigued, " if I GO and ask him to do owt around here, I get a earful..."

Diane smiled at her, " I must have the knack..."

While collecting the glasses, Aaron stood and stalked Betty and Edna...who both had VERY little in their cherry glasses, Edna looked up, " WHAT are you waiting here for lad, there are some empties over there to collect..."

Aaron pulled a heavy sigh, " but I am waiting till you finish...SEEING since there's about NAFF all left of yah drinks..."

Betty smiled up at him, " and we might WANT another...isn't that right Edna..."

Aaron glared at her, " ARE you winding me up!..."

Diane came over, " AARON...go get those other glasses..." she said, defusing any protential situation of a row developing...

Aaron continued his glare a minute longer, before doing as Diane had instructed, "sorry about that ladies...just can't get the staff..."

Aaron dumped the empties on to the bar, and heard his mobile jingle...he snatched it out of his pocket...Callum had texted him..._can i see you..._

Aaron ignored it and stuffed the phone back into his trakkies...he then sat back down to finish off his pint.

At Dale Head, Jackson and Joe chatted...well Joe chatted, Jackson just sat there in silence listening, "...and so then I met this other girl...who I ALSO met on the net, and sorta double booked me self like...and well BOTH of them turned up at this restraurant...and well...you can imagine what happened...it weren't pretty"

Jackson laughed, it even surprized himself, he didn't think Joe would cheer him up after a tense evening at his fathers...but he had.

"look.." began Jackson, he was looking the other way when he said it, " you can sorta come back if you like..."

Joe leaned forward and put his hand to his ear, "didn't quite catch that mate, what was that..."

Jackson rolled his tongue long the inside of his bottom lip, " I said...you can come back...IF YOU LIKE..."

Joe nodded his head, from where he sat on Jackson's bed, " yeah I thought you said that...BUT since you SACKED me...I might be busy...you know, caring for other folk who appreciate me work"

Jackson turned his chair, so he was face to face with Joe, " look...I'm sorry bout that...it was just I had alot going on...in my life...I WASN'T thinking straight..."

Joe raised his eyebrowes, " ANYWAY, I thought you said your Dad was gonna be helping alot more...let me guess...IT didn't work out..."

Jackson nodded, his gaze hitting the floor, " something like that..." he then raised his head to Joe, eyes all doey " but will yah...come back I mean...I were just saying to mum the other day I want another carer...you know with HER being useless and all that...and I were ONLY thinking this morning that MAYBE I could have YOU again...you know...with you being already gotten close and personal with me bum and bits and like..."

Joe laughed at him, " I should be slapping that bum for YOU messing me about...THE hassle my boss gave me...", Jackson gave him a teethy grin, " you can go SLAPPING me arse as PAINFUL as you like, Joe..." his eyes then rolled cheekily away, "...because I won't be feeling it..."

Hazel was then upon them...with their brews, " here we go boys...a nice brew..."

Jackson looked up to his mum, " did you go picking the leaves from china or something...the length of time YOU took to make it!"

Hazel sat back in her chair, " I just thought I'd leave you and Joe here to talk that's all..." she cried.

Joe turned to her with a smile, " and we're be talking alot more...HE'S asked me back...mind you I'd have to clear it with me boss first"

Hazel put on a pleased expression, " HAS he...ohhhh THAT IS good news..."

Jackson turned to her, eyebrowes pulled, " DON'T be go playing the 'that is good news card' on me mum...I knew yah plan..."

Hazel looked away with a smile...at least things were STARTING to get back to normal...

Over at the pub, Aaron was in the back room playing his music out loud, on the stereo...Diane came through with her fingers in her ears, " CAN YOU BE TURNING THAT RACKET DOWN PET!" she asked with a shout.

Aaron looked up at her from where he sat on the sofa, he placed his hand to his ear, "WHAT..."

Diane was about to tell him again...but instead, went over and turned it off, Aaron leaned forward, arm raised out, " DO YOU MIND...I were listening to that..."

Diane nodded at him, " yes, I'd expect you were...ALONG WITH everyone else in the pub...!"

Aaron's expression softened, and his gaze met the floor, " yeah...I'm sorry bout that..."

Diane tilted her head at him, " look pet...I DON'T mind you playing yah records...JUST not at the expense of everyone else...the rate THAT noise was going, me juke box would have been made redundant..." she said, trying to smooth over any tenseness.

Aaron stood up and made for the door, " yeah!...and as I SAID...I'm sorry...WHAT more do yah want..." he then stormed out and lept upstairs to his room...Diane shook her head in a sigh and went back to run the bar...

In the bar Chas was finishing serving Alan Turner when Diane came back through, " you've managed to get that music turned down then...SEE, like I said, he does what YOU tell him..." Chas smiled.

Diane watched Alan walk away to a nearby table and turned, " look pet...THIS really isn't going to work is it...", Chas's expression became desparate, " ohhhhh Diane pleeaase...give him a chance a...he's just been through alot that's all..."

Diane raised her eyebrowes, " been THROUGH what...a break up...JOIN the club...haven't we all...but you don't go seeing others ACTING the way he does...no wonder why Rhona put her foot down..."

Chas sighed in dispair...so Diane sofened her approach, " he's GOT ONE more chance...and then he's gone..." and with that she went to serve a customer, Chas smiled gratefully, hoping Aaron would behave himself soon..he HAD too...for his sake...

Over at Dale Head, Joe had long gone, and Jackson was finally lying on his bed trying to have a doze, but one eye was open...his mum was up to something...he could hear her fiddle with stuff...and move things about, he had had enough, he rolled his head to her, " MUM...what are you doing a...CAN you just GO up stairs...OR better still GO OUT...instead of skulking round here..."

Hazel coughed a couple of times, " I wasn't skulking...I was just having a nice tidy round that's all..."

"IS that why you are hovering near ME laptop...you look all red, what's the matter, me porn sites a bit much for yah..." Jackson sneered with sarcasm..

Hazel closed up the laptop," noooo love...I was trying to get some more info about THAT place we saw yesterday..." she started to swoon in excitement, " ohhhh Jackson, IT HAD ALL we needed, didn't it...EVERYTHING..." she clasped her hands together thinking about it...

Jackson looked up to the ceiling, not really wanting to spoil her happy moment " yeah it WERE nice...but mum...IT'S way outta our price range, isnt it...EVEN with the benefits...i'm sorry...it's JUST not gonna happen..."

There was then a bang on the door, Jackson rolled his eyes in frustration, " AM I EVER gonna be allowed to be getting any kip in today!"

Hazel went over and answered it, she looked at the lad stood there, " hello Mrs Walsh...", Hazel gave him a funny expression, " excuse me love, but DO I know you...", the face seemed familiar...but the name escaped her...

" I'm Phil...I saw you at the supermarket LAST week...I'm one of Jackson's mates...", Hazel suddenly cracked a smile...and widened the door open further, " ohhhhh...of course!...come in love...me minds like a sieve lately..."

Hazel ushered Phil into the room, " Jackson!...look whose come to see you...it's Paul..."

"Phil..." corrected Phil, digging his hands into his pockets, Jackson lifted his head up...and sighted him, " oh it's you...WHAT can I do for yah..." he let his head fall back to the pillow, "AFTER all this time..." the sarcasm building...

Phil came forward, " yeah...it's been a while mate...it's just I've been busy...well...i mean...", Jackson stared at the ceiling and pursed his lips together, " DIDN'T want to come see, and feel sorry for the cripple you mean..." there was a harshness in his tone.

Hazel lept forward in Phil's defense, " Jackson, Phil's come to see yah...I SAW him the other day...HE was ASKING after yah..."

"is that WHY you remembered his name..." Jackson pointed out frankly.

Hazel waved her hand at him, with a giggle " you know me with names...I'VE never been any good...AND that's coming from a supply teacher...SO, Phil can I get you anything...tea...coffee..."

Phil waved his hand as he sat, " a water will be great thanks...", Hazel looked at him and pulled a face, "A WATER ...I TAKE IT from the tap is alright...", Phil nodded at her, as she disappeared up the stairs...

Jackson rolled his head toward Phil, "that control pad there...press the green one...I like to be sat up for YOUR explanation...should be good this!"

Phil grabbed the remote pad, and pressed...Jackson was raised up, so he was sitting up, Jackson then gave him a sarcastic grin, " NOW...go on then...AND it better be good...like...let me think..." he turned away to exaggerate his stream of thought, and then snapped his neck round to face him, eyebrowes pulled together "...oh that'll be it...YOU WENT AND GOT HIT BY A TRAIN!"

In the pub, Chas finished serving a customer...and realised how much her feet were aching...it had been a long shift, especially with that tart Alicia being in Spain with Andy looking for properties.

As she fiddled with her heel, a lad came up to the bar, Chas smiled at him, " what can I get you love..."

The lad smiled back at her, " I was actually looking for a mate of mine...Aaron, do you know him..."

Aaron was upstairs in his room...he tried to sleep but couldn't...he felt restless...and if the truth be known...he didn't want to dream ANYMORE of them dreams...

A gentle tap at his door, was replaced with Chas's head popping around the corner,Aaron pulled a glare at her, " WHAT you want...I just WANT some peace..."

Chas pointed down ward, " there's someone DOWN stairs to see yah...HE'S in the bar waiting...", Aaron sat up, trying to think who it might be, " is it's Adam, tell him..."

Chas shook her head at him, " it's NOT Adam...nah...this one is MUCH more good looking...", she got all flirty...and Aaron realised she MENT it was a bloke to 'see' him...

Aaron instantly thought of Callum...at first he thought about telling her to 'get rid', but thought better of it...he'd have to DEAL with him himself, he stood and pushed passed her, Chas followed him down the stairs and they went through to the bar.

Callum it was...he was leaning his back to the bar, and turned his head as Aaron came through, " hiya mate...I've been calling yah...", Aaron snatched his arm and pulled him toward the exit doors, Diane looked up to see them leave in hushed up whispers, she turned to Chas, " whose THAT!"

Chas put her hands together, beaming a smile, " I think my Aaron's found himself ANOTHER fella..." she turned to her, " so you can STOP getting yah knickers in a twist...HE'S gonna be behaving himself now..."

Diane raised her eyebrowes, " I BELIEVE THAT, when I see it..."

At Dale Head, Phil was trying to get Jackson to forgive him, " look...Jackson...WE did come to the hospital mate...to see yah...but we could NEVER get past that bloody guard dog of yours..."

Jackson pulled a frown at him, "WHAT!...THAT nurse...she were a pussy cat, her!"

Phil shook his head at him, " NO yah div, IT were that apelike boyfriend of yours...WE asked to see yah...HE gave us one of his killing SCOWLS..."

Jackson turned his head away, " HE were just protecting me, I'd expect..."

"who from!... yah mates..." he sat back down...Jackson turned his head...and finally smiled at him genienely, " yah... Aaron could always OVER DO the protecting part..."

Phil nodded, then looked up, " well...I'm sorry it never worked out for yahs...", Jackson looked downward, a sadness in his tone, " yeah well...IT WERE never gonna work was it...WE were just kidding ourselves"

Phil bit his lip, and looked up," I saw him the other night...", Jackson met his gaze, "yeah...HE said that he went into town...we are still mates...well sort of"

Phil pulled a face, " no...I didn't SEE him in town...it were at a party...", Jackson's eyes locked to phil's " who's party..."

Phil leaned forward, as he placed his glass of water down, " do you remember that Martin and Justin..."

Jackson shot away his glance, unimpressed, " errrr, yeah...pair of pratts...wait a sec...WERE it their party...Aaron doesn't know them..." Jackson realised.

Phil shrugged, " well I don't know about him...but the bloke he was WITH seemed to...", Jackson stared at him, and Phil realised THIS was all news to Jackson, " sorry mate..."

Jackson went quiet...trying to fathom out WHO the bloke was, he then snapped his neck round, "it would have been some mate he went with..." he was trying to laugh it off...but was failing...the hurt seeping through, Phil picked up on it, " Well me mate said, he WAS all over Aaron...very touchy feelie..."

Jackson swallowed down the lump in his throat, " stop it..."

"stop what..." asked Phil puzzled.

Jackson focused his gaze onto his chest, " stop stirring...", Phil shook his head, "but I'm not mate..." Phil changed the subject, "HEY, me and the old crowd were wondering whether you'd like a good night out, pub, club...the movies...Pete were only saying the LAST time he saw you was at Dan's engagement party a few weeks back..."

Jackson lifted his head to him, it seemed he hadn't heard Phil's last bit about going out, "Aaron doesn't DO touchy feelie...it's NOT him...YOU are just saying THAT to get back at him...for turning yous away at the hospital...THAT'S if you came..."

Phil laughed out loud, as if it were a joke, " WHAT are you talking about mate...course we came to visit yah..."

Jackson wasn't in the mood, " can you GO now please...", Phil shook his head in surprize, "what..."

"I said CAN you go now please...I'm tired...and...what was the other thing..." he then forced up a hard stare, " ahh that'll be it...I'M BORED of yah company...you've ALWAYS enjoyed stirring it up, haven't yah..."

Phil stood, but was hesitate to leave, " Jackson mate...look...", but before he could say anymore, Jackson was raising his voice, " CAN YOU JUST LEAVE...", Phil was open mouthed in shock at the outburst, and headed out, but before he went, he turned his head, " call me yeah...if you want to go out...", Jackson said nothing, so he went, closing the door behind him, leaving Jackson to stew on his own thoughts...and conclusions...

Callum sat on the table bench, on the Woolpacks forecourt out front, Aaron was sitting ON the table with his feet on the bench looking down at him, the sun beating down, " look...I'm sorry bout running out on yah...but you should have done what I said...FORGET about me", Callum looked up at him, " look, when I went back to the party, some of the lads...they told me...about Jackson...", clearly by the reponse on Aaron's face, Callum could see he was unimpressed, " well, THEY should've done...THEY know nothing!", Callum shrugged at him, "well they have now...look, mate...if you wanna talk about it, or...", Aaron snapped his head round, " TALK about it...what to you...YOU know nothing mate...I'm dealing with this ON MY own...so YOU...", he jumped to the pavement and nodded toward his vehicle, " ...can jump back into yah tractor...and chug on..." he then started to walk away, lighting up a ciggy as he did so, Callum went after him, " Aaron wait up...", Aaron sighed and turned, "what...DON'T you get the hint i'm NOT interested..."

Callum smiled, " loud and clear...look...come out with me friday...club, pub...we could even see a film if you want...AS MATES...if you are that worried...", Aaron smirked at him, " if I say no...I won't get any peace will I...", Callum smirked back shaking his head, Aaron finally nodded, " Okay...I'll text yah...BUT NO promises...", Callum jumped onto his tractor and smiled, " that's good enough for me...", and feeling chuffed drove the tractor on, up the main street, Aaron stood and watched it go...his smile faded as he looked toward Dale head...Hazel was outside the front door, so he walked off in the opposite direction...

Over at Dale head, Hazel sighed and went inside, at first, her eyes scanned the room, then she focused on her son, on his bed feeling sorry for himself, " so...YOUR mate gone then...that was a flying visit..."

Jackson turned to her, " DO us a favour mum...IF he or anyone ELSE turns up unanounced tell them I'M DEAD!" his tone was harsh.

Hazel approached the bed, " well...if that's the mood you were in, i'd say you scared the poor lad off..."

Jackson shook his head at her, " mum...he were a pratt...I NEVER LIKED him anyway...", Hazel gave him a sympathetic look, " but HE did make the effort to come round...to see yah...", Jackson mocked her, " THAT'LL be right...so he could explain away the reasons WHY him and the rest of me flaming mates NEVER bothered to come and see mah!...HE EVEN asked me to come out with them...the CHEEK of that!"

Hazel raised her eyebrowes, " trouble with you my dear boy, you HOLD a grudge...GO out with them Jackson, go get yahself a life...YOU'RE always saying you HATE being around me 24/7!...GO OUT...have a laugh...what harm can it do love..." she leaned foward, " you have to GET OUT THERE again...I mean, i'm not saying I'll be not worrying me self sick...but it's not about me is it..."

Jackson nodded slowly...glancing ever so slightly toward Aaron's photo on the window...if HE can have fun...and NOT care...then HE could too...he smiled at his mum, " alright...get me phone on...I wanna do a text..."

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	12. Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...as always give me your thoughts and opinions where this story should go...I AM SO SORRY about the long time between chapters...My other story only has Jackson in...and I've missed writing for Aaron, so I thought why not...hope you like...feeling better today! xx

PS; to the reviewer (who couldn't be bothered to place a name to!), who wrote that I need to learn how to spell , I'll be the FIRST person to tell you that i'm not perfect...please feel free NOT to read my stories, or review...haha you won't be missed!

Aaron Livesy pulled on his black T shirt, and slapped on the aftershave, he looked into the mirror, and made sure his hair was gelled up, he had been growing it...not too long, just enough that he could do something with it...Jackson had said he liked his hair slightly longer than practically bald, not that he had been growing it for him...Jackson was just a mate, well he would be if he made the effort to go see him, and he hadn't done of late...he felt guilty about NOT going to see him...but he felt better not going...not seeing him let him move on easier...

He had to be honest, maybe Jackson leaving the village would be a good thing...at least that way he needn't feel he had to go visit him anymore...

He stared at his reflection, and then looked up to see his mother watching him from the door, he pulled a frown, " how long have you been standing there gawping!"

Chas smiled as she stepped in, "not long, so you are off out then..." she pried.

Aaron put on his watch, " yeah I am, so what...what's it to you if I am, anyway"

Chas sat on his bed, " well I'm pleased for yah love, bout time you got out there and enjoyed yourself"

Aaron pulled her a face, " and WHAT'S that supposed to me!"

"I'm JUST saying...it's good you are going out love, you've spent far too much time stuck in this room, it's just good to see you going out, that's all"

Aaron shrugged at her, " well, just maybe it's time I did...you know, go out I mean...everyones being saying it, and you can't ALL be wrong..."

Chas was choked up...Aaron seemed so sincere right then, " so...are you going out...on your own like...or..." she trailed off.

Aaron smirked, he knew she was trying to fish for information, " that guy...the one who came to see me the other day...we're just gonna see a film, THAT'S ALL, END OF!

Chas waved up her hands as she stood up, " I'm not gonna intefere me,I think it's great you're moving on...just don't go and mess it up yeah..."

Aaron stared at her, " mess what up...me and Callum are JUST mates...there's nothing to mess up...SO..." he leaned forward, and gave his mother a rare kiss on the cheek, " don't wait up!"

XxX

Aaron made his way to the shop to buy himself a pack of ciggys, Leyla served him, and remarked how nice he looked...he felt good about himself...he had felt so much anger and frustration over the last few weeks, it was just SO nice to be doing something normal, for a change.

As Aaron went to leave the shop with his pack of ciggys in his grasp, he bumped straight into Hazel.

Hazel looked up at him...she realised that Aaron was all dressed up...it was not hard to notice these things, especially with Aaron, because, with Aaron, and past experiance he was ALWAYS in a pair of trakkies and a hoodie.

"alright love, going out anywhere nice...", she chirped with a smile for him.

Aaron put his hand on his hip, and looked over her shoulder, " just out..."

Hazel could sense that Aaron didn't particularly want to stand and chat with her, so she put on a big smile and said, " well, have a nice time then..."

Aaron went to leave, but turned...he couldn't help himself...was SHE having a dig!

"WHAT'S that supposed to mean...have a nice time without Jackson you mean...is that it!"

Hazel shook her head at him, " no love, I never said that..."

"BUT you think it...", he stepped toward her, " I'M getting ON with me life...I'm sick of the past...I'm sick to the stomach about what NEARLY happened...but that's done with now...now is time to move on...and I am...and you can go report that back to him if you like", he then saw a car pull up across the road, Callum was peering out of it's open window, grinning at him.

Aaron turned to her, " this is me...was there anything else...good...don't wait up" he then jogged across to the car and jumped in, and Hazel stood outside the shop and watched it speed away.

She smiled sadly to herself...maybe this was a good thing...it would be better in the long run...for all of them.

XxX

Aaron and Callum were in the car, the windows were down, and it was a scorching hot July evening.

The warm wind blew into Aaron's face as he faced the window...and then he turned his head to face Callum, it had been a few days since he had invited him out, and seeing since he was fully aware that he was proberly on his last chance at staying with his mum at the woolpack, he decided he really needed to sort out his life.

Callum was an ok guy...so what was his problem about not liking him...he was fit...goodlooking, although he could be abit of a div sometimes, but were most people, folk weren't perfect, were they.

And he was certainly not perfect, he'd be the first one to admit it...reluctantly of course!

Callum turned his own head and spoke, as he pulled up behind some traffic that was heading into the cinema complex, " So...what you want to see...I were thinking the smurfs!" a huge cheeky grin was all over his face.

Aaron glared at him, " YOU WHAT!"

Callum eased the car into the complexes carpark, "It'll be fun...what's wrong with that!"

"If you're about 12 maybe...nah, WE are NOT seeing them smurfs, crikey it's something that Jackson would go see..." he trailed off thinking about him, and instantly felt the guilt...he was stuck at home in bed, while he was out having some fun with another fella...but this time, it was different...this time HE wanted to have fun...he needed to move on with his life, and now was good enough...and Callum wasn't all that bad...after all he made him laugh, and not many folk could do that!

Callum parked up, and upon removing the key from the ignition, he turned to Aaron, "look...we don't have to go see anything...we can just go for a drink if you like"

Aaron shrugged, and nodded his head toward the cinema complex across the carpark, a mass of movie goers heading in that direction, " we're here now...anyway, I were just joking about the smurfs...we can see it if you wanna...", but inside Aaron was hoping he didn't...there was NO WAY anyones gonna know Aaron Livesy went to see a film that was aimed for 12 year olds!

Both jumped out the car, and Callum leaned his arms on the roof removing his shades, " I'm sure there's an action movie on...pretty sure THAT'S your type of gene, isn't it"

Aaron raised his eyebrowes with a smirk, " NOW you're talking, nothing below an 18 cert, me!"

They made their way to the complex, and on entering the mass foyers, Callum went to the machine and bought the tickets, "Rise of the planet of the apes do yah..."he asked.

Aaron wasn't sure, but seeing the que behind them, he nodded, " yeah why not..."

After getting the tickets, they both made their way to the shop to get a coke and popcorn, Callum disappeared into the gents, as Aaron scooped up his popcorn, he popped one into his mouth and went to the que to pay, the waiting made him think...ahead of him were couples, behind him were couples, the friday night dates...and he asked himself...was THIS a date...

IF, and it was only an if, this was a date...it seemed to be going alright, his mum said don't mess it up, and he had just dismissed what she said as intefering...but she was right, he didn't want to mess it up, so who cares whether this was a date...he needed to move on...

XxX

As they took there seats in screen 8 theatre, both sat looking out ahead to the screen...it was blank at the moment, as more and more folk were turning in to their seats, and the music was playing out in the foreground...he could just make it out, it was bruno marrs...and it made his mind look back...and the longer it played on, the more he looked back, and he was lost within himself.

Callum put a hand on his thigh, it made Aaron flinch abit, but he calmed down instantly, "sorry...I keep doing that don't I" he said apologising.

Callum looked at him, as the music faded, and the blank screen gave way to trailers, "are you alright...about this I mean..."

Aaron nodded, " yeah I am actually..."

And with that Aaron slowly put his hand gently on top of Callum's...it was pretty discreet because of where they were, but by the geniene smile on Aaron's face...he knew that Aaron was happy.

The trailers soon gave way to the main feature, and Callum smiled as he stared out to the beginning credits...that first day he saw Aaron...that day when he had nearly collided his tractor with Aaron's car, he knew there was something special about him.

Until now, or of what he had heard of anyway, Jackson Walsh had been the only lad in Aaron's life...

And he was certain that HIS job was to show Aaron that there IS life AFTER Jackson...that Jackson wasn't the only lad to show him a good time...

and he was gonna have a good crack at it...

he just hoped Aaron would feel the same way...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	13. Chapter 13

CHAPTER 13/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...as always give me your thoughts and opinions where this story should go...yep!, and two come along at once! I told you I was feeling better...only kidding, I've cheated, I half wrote these last 2 chapters a few weeks back, so it was easy to finish them off and upload...the next chapter won't be so 'snappy'.

Still haven't a clue whether A and J will get back together in this...I'll go by how everyone feels, so you better let me know, going by this chapter it doesn't look good! xx

Aaron watched the sun shine in through his bedroom windows at the Woolpack, he laid back on his bed thinking about one person...a guy...a guy called Callum.

He hated to admit it, but he liked being with Callum...that date to the cinema the other night was pretty amazing.

And yes...it were a date...because now he knew he WANTED it to be a date...he was just unsure before hand...the thought of going out with another fella in that capacity...but now that it was done and dusted...but instead of feeling guilty, he found himself wanting more.

He sat up and looked to the photo that sat on his bedside...it were of him and Jackson...a snap taking of them at bar west last year, he sighed and picked it up...and after staring at it for a while, he gently put it back, faced down.

His mother was then at the door way, " soooo...are you gonna be spending ALL yah day off up here, or will you be going out..." she said, with a hint of 'to meet somebody' in her tone.

Aaron jumped up, and beamed her a smile, " I think I might actually..."

Chas watched him pull on a grey hoodie, " blimey kid, it's 80 degrees outside, and you are gonna be wearing THAT!"

Aaron zipped it up and turned, " YEAH!, and you've got a problem with that because..."

Chas shook her face, " no, no...you wear what you like love, you know me...I'm not gonna be interfering anymore...i've turned over a new leaf me"

Aaron just stared at her, then pushed past and headed off down the stairs...Diane was then at her side, " come on you, we've got to get that bar ready, it won't do it self pet...and with Moira having problems with the farm, and Alicia still in Spain with Andy, so i'm afraid it's down to us pet!"

Chas was in a mind of her own...but then was starting to realise Diane had spoken to her, "what was that...I were miles away..."

Diane raised her eyebrowes, " it looked like it...look about Aaron, he fixed me plug earlier on the hairdryer...I just wanted to say...maybe it's good to have him around...MIND YOU, if he plays up again..." she warned.

"I think you won't be seeing that side again, ooooh my fingers are crossed anyway..I'm so sorry Diane, I know he's been a right pain in the butt lately, and more...but...I think he REALLY has turned a corner now...to see him smile again..."

Diane smiled up at her, " it's nice to see a smile on YOUR face too love, if he's happy you're happy...you can't ask any more than that can you, pet"

Chas headed down the stairs, and Diane broke into a grin...Chas had been so worried about Aaron of late...and it had just got worse and worse over recent weeks...and she ment what she said, it was nice to see a smile upon her face again.

xXx

Aaron made his way up main street, but he was careful to avoid the garage...it was HIS day off, and if Cain and Debbie were overloaded with work, he wasn't going to get roped into helping out, plus anyway, he had plans.

Upon glancing towards the garage, he didn't see Cain or Debbie...but he did see Jackson's carer Joe, crossing the road toward his car.

Aaron thought about turning his back on him, and walk off...but Joe had seen him anyway, so it was too late.

"Hey Aaron, long time no see mate..." chirped Joe opening the door to his car, Aaron looked up...and raised his eyebrowes in acknowledgement, " so the rumours are true then, you ARE back" he told.

Joe shook his head with a grin, " afraid so, Well i did make him beg abit, due to being sacked like...but you know how patronising he can be!"

Aaron thought about asking how Jackson was, but decided against it...the last thing he wanted was for Joe to tell Jackson on his next visit, that Aaron was ASKING after him.

Joe nodded his head toward Dale head, "why don't you go visit him...MIND YOU be on your guard, he is well on form today"

Aaron turned to face Dale Head, he thought about it for a second...but turned back to Joe with a smile, " maybe I'll go see him tomorrow...but don't tell him that, because I might..."

Joe raised his eyebrow," change your mind...look I know it's proberly differcult after all what's gone on..."

Aaron snapped his head up, " what do you mean by THAT!"

Had he found out about what had happened...had Jackson confided in him.

"you and him splitting up...it must be hard for yah...it is for him, he doesn't sat owt...but sometimes you can tell when he's deep in thought..."

Aaron shrugged the notion off, and looked at his watch, " look I've gotta go, it's good that he's got you back...see yah..."

Joe watched him go, then jumped into his car and headed off.

xXx

In the shop Paddy had just bought a few groceries when Chas came in, she was all big smiles and bouncy, Paddy turned to her after paying Leyla, " hey, what's put a spring in your step then, or should I be asking who..."

Chas laughed, and waved her hand at him, " ohhh Paddy it's NOT that...it's Aaron!"

Paddy was always concerned when it came to Aaron, what has he done now was the usual question, but going by Chas's mood today...it MIGHT be something good for a change, "what about him..."

Chas pulled out a milk from the fridge, and turned, " he's got himself another bloke...YOU should have seen him the other night Paddy, I haven't seen him in a HAPPY mood in such a long time!"

Leyla chipped in, as she took Chas's money for the milk, " she's right, Aaron looked pretty made up in here, when he got his fags, I THINK it's the first time i've actually seen him smile!"

Paddy was smiling...but he was still not convinced, " maybe he just went out with a mate, YOU know how funny he can get if you think he's going on a date"

"WHO CARES PADDY!" Chas told, " what ever it was, IT MADE HIM SMILE, it's about time he got on with his life, put ALL THAT behind him...", she trailed off, Leyla was listening, so she led Paddy out of the shop, " YOU know what he's been like lately...all mardy and bad tempered with everyone...NOW, it seems he's turning a corner...and in MY book, that's good, isn't it", Paddy could still detect Chas was seeking approval of her thoughts, proberly doubting herself that she was getting it all wrong again.

"yeah, you right, he deserves abit of normality doesn't he, just don't...you know..."

"mess it up for him by asking too many questions!, Paddy I wish you would have more faith in me!" she told slapping him on the arm.

Paddy looked up to see Rhona come up main street, with baby Leo in the pram, " well this is me...look, tell Aaron he can come and see Leo when he wants to...he's been stopping away of late, because he thinks Rhona has a problem with him, so..."

Chas shook her head and smiled, "I'll tell him"

XxX

Aaron walked up the dirt track, and saw the farm approaching his vision, a big house with barns on one side, he instantly saw the tractor, Callum's tractor, parked up on the verge of a corn field.

He dug his hands into his trakkie pockets and moved forward, he could hear farming machinery on his left, and realised it was a combine harvester...an older man was at it's wheel.

Aaron hurried up the dirt track to the farm buildings and came to the small fense that was ahead of the front door...

This was the first time he'd come to Callum's place...Callum had said to him that it was alright to call round anytime...but now he felt abit awkward...what if Callum was too busy to spent time with him.

He opened the low iron gate that screeched, and stepped up to the front door, upon knocking a woman answered, a thin woman with scraggy blond hair scraped back with a single pin, "Yes" she barked, it seems she was in the middle of something, " if you're after work then I'm sorry we've just taken a lad on"

Aaron shook his head, and frowned " no...errrr...is Callum around"

The woman FINALLY broke into a smile, " you must be this Aaron he's been going on about"

Aaron didn't know what to think about that...Callum WAS keen...this had to be his batty mother he had told him about, " is he in" he said after a pause, where she just kept grinning at him.

The woman pointed to the field beyond the barns, " he's up there...you can't miss him, he'll be surrounded by about 50 haystacks!"

Aaron just backed away shaking his head, " thanks...", she watched him close the gate, and head off to the direction of the field before closing the door.

XxX

Aaron jumped over the fence, and headed up the field...it had been freshly cut of corn...the sun was beating down on him, and that made him begin to sweat over the browe.

And there he was...Callum...and he was lugging lay stacks, and piling them up into groups.

Aaron paused and watched him at work for a moment or two...the lad was topless, his red overalls hanging loose around his waist.

The sweat was all shiney over his fit muscular bod.

Aaron could tell before, that Callum was a well built lad, and even amagined what it must look like, but now he could see for himself...that fit body in the flesh.

Callum dumped a haystack onto another and stopped for a breather...and as he placed his hands down on his knee caps, he looked up to see Aaron watching him.

Callum smiled, he made for the bottle of water he had, and took a much needed gulp, as Aaron was making his way over.

"like watching men at work!" Callum teased after taking in another gulp of the cold water.

Aaron shrugged, " depends who it is...", he stopped a short distance away and looked closely at the haystacks, " there's alot of work here...are you on yah own"

Callum nodded, " yeah, Simon's called in sick...I've gotta stack these up, then put the tarpulin over them...got to peg it sercure cus it's gonna rain tonight"

Aaron felt alittle disappointed...he realised Callum was up to his eyes in it, but he was hoping they could go out again.

So he made a suggestion: " do you want me to give you a hand"

Callum didn't mean to laugh out loud, but he did, " WHAT YOU...what do you know about farm work...this is not yah go tickering beneath a motor you know!"

Aaron became all defensive, " I've helped out on me mates farm!...I know what's what"

Callum shrugged, " alright then...but you best take that top off...otherwise you'll be sweating like a pig in this heat!"

Aaron didn't know whether he wanted to take his top of...but he did...slowly he unzipped the hoodie, and placed it on the ground, Callum looked up...Aaron could see the half smile in his face, he seemed pleased on what was on display.

Aaron was self conscious though, " can we just get to the stacking..." he asked bluntly,

And with two of them on the job...the task was finished in half the time.

The last thing to do was peg the tarpulin to the ground to stop the covering being blown away, after hammering down the last peg, both sat next to eachother hot and sweaty, and sharing what was left of the warmed up bottle of water.

Callum turned, " thanks for that..."

Aaron gazed up across the sky...it was clouding up...and the wind was getting gusty, blowing loose straw around them, " it's alright..." he turned with a smirk, " I could be doing BETTER things on me day off mind, but, at least we can go out now..." he trailed off, and looked the other way.

Callum half smiled,but he was infact pleased as punch, the cinema 'date' was a few days back, and he thought it was just a one off...but Aaron seemed so relaxed, maybe his pursuing him had paid off.

"are you telling me... that...you want to go out with me"

Aaron hated direct questions like that...it was still dodgy ground for him...all he knew was that, he LIKED Callum's company...and he wanted to spend MORE time with him.

"depending on WHAT going out means" he finally answered looking away.

Callum shrugged, he also looked the other way, " it could mean how you want it to"

Aaron closed his eyes for a second, then turned around to face him, " I think you...you might know what I mean..." he swallowed hard before saying, " what I'm trying to say is...if you want it to be a date...then...then I'm sorta..."

Callum met his unsure gaze, " sorta...what"

"you know what I mean...I'm rubbish at this..." he admitted.

Callum continued to look at him, that fit machanic sitting beside him in a cut cornfield, who was all sweaty and bare chested...but otherwise, made him all excited and turned on.

He gently placed his hand onto Aaron's...like Aaron had done on his in the cinema a few nights back, He held Aaron's unsure gaze and started to move in...Aaron lowered his eyes to watch Callums mouth as it approached his own...

"LAD! ARE YOU THERE!" called a gruff voice, completely flattening the moment dead.

It was that older man whom Aaron had seen driving the combine harvester earlier.

Callum jumped to his feet, " dad!...yeah It's all done...Me mate came over to help me with it!"

The older bloke, who was Callum's father turned to face Aaron, " and you are..."

But before Aaron could answer him, Callum jumped in, " he's just a mate dad...he was just in the area like...did me a favour..."

The older bloke glared at Aaron...Aaron glared at him back, but that was just Aaron!

"well good job lads...Mum'll have your tea on the table in abit so DON'T be long...", and then Callum's father disappeared back down the hill towards the house.

Aaron turned, holding out his arm, " what WAS that all about...WHY didn't you let me...", Callum throw him his hoodie, that had been lying upon the ground, " he doesn't know!"

Aaron pulled on his hoodie, and zipped it up, " he doesn't know what...that you're gay"

Callum laughed, "no, don't be silly...he KNOWS ALL about that!...it's just you...he doesn't know it's you...the lad who trashed our fence, and ruined some corn..."

Aaron followed Callum down the hill, " so he's gonna have a problem with that is he!"

They came to the fence, " no...I JUST have to smooth things over first...holds abit of a grudge does my dad!"

Aaron shrugged, " bring it on...I'LL soon tell him where to go, you're 20, you can DO and SEE who you like"

Callum grinned at him, and placed a hand on Aaron's cheek...Aaron gazed into Callum's eyes, and again watched as his mouth neared his own...he could feel the hand that was on his cheek slide to the back of his head to pull him in closer...

and they kissed...slowly and gently, until Callum pulled away, " are you alright about that..." he asked, alittle concerned for Aaron, knowing this would be hard for him.

Aaron wasn't sure...he'd kissed someone else before...but that had been in the club in the stinking gents...not long after that day...

But that had been reckless...that had borne out of been lust...that had been pure stupidity...

But this was different, he liked that kiss...it felt right...

and just MAYBE the best kiss he'd ever received...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	14. Chapter 14

CHAPTER 14/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...lots of different opinions about whether Aaron should stay with Callum, or go back to Jackson...I've taken it all in...and you're just have to wait and see...XX

Feel free to stick your oar's in, and your opinions anytime!

Aaron Livesy ate his breakfast in the back room of the Woolpack, Victoria then came through the door...she could see Aaron was reading a text while he was eating his cereal, she smiled to herself, she loved to tease Aaron, so she tried to snatch the mobile from his grasp...but she failed in her task, Aaron was ALWAYS too quick for her, " nice try..." he glowered.

Victoria pushed out her bottom lip, " I'm only teasing, you know how I like to show an interest in other peoples love lifes..."

Aaron glared up at her, " BEING NOSEY you mean, anyways WHO says it's owt to do with me love life, I were just texting Cain"

Victoria laughed at him, " and you always end his texts with a kiss do you!"

Aaron pulled her a face, " just butt out will yah, MY life is got nowt to do with you...", Victoria sat next to him on the couch, " I'm ONLY messing with you, take a chill pill will yah...everyone KNOWS you are seeing another lad..."

This got her his full attention, as he snapped shut his mobile, and looked at her, Victoria could see alarm in his eyes, " what do you mean by that... EVERYONE knows about me and Callum"

Victoria liked the sound of that name, " he seems fit...I wouldn't mind having him for myself, just don't go and tell Alex, yeah!" she said light heartedly.

Aaron stood up, and went over and dumped his breakfast bowl into the sink, " HEY!, Diane's told me to tell you, that you have to start washing up your own stuff " Victoria informed.

Aaron turned around to face her,raising his eyebrowes " MAKE ME...I'm off to work..."

Victoria watched him walk out the door, and sighed to herself, why did Aaron have to be MARDY ALL the time!"

XxX

Aaron stood in the bar, Victoria's words still going round and round inside his mind, did EVERYONE KNOW about him and Callum...it had been a few weeks now since they started going out...and if he was to admit it to himself deep down, they hadn't really been that discreet about it, they were always seen around the village together...and his mum wasn't exactly known to keep her big gob shut.

As he came out the pub, he saw Rhona pushing Baby Leo up the road...Aaron stood and watched her for a few moments...until she dropped the 3 bags of shopping she had balancing on the prams handle.

Aaron instantly came running over, grabbing some apples that were rolling up the street, "It's alright I can manage" told Rhona, bending down picking up more of the groceries.

Aaron continued to help, then Leo started to cry, Rhona looked tired, "ohhhhh...not again, what's wrong with you today!" she cried.

But when she looked up, Aaron had already taken Leo out of the pram, and held him up in front of him, Rhona was just about to lose her rag, when she realised that Leo had stopped crying.

"HOW do you do that!..." she cried out in frustration, " he did that with YOU before ..."

Aaron pulled her a grin, "Just think he likes me, that's all...not THAT many folk do...", Rhona softened her glare at him, they had not spoken much since Aaron had moved out from Smithy.

"I'm sorry...about how I was with you" she began, " you had alot on, and I was abit harsh..."

Aaron gently handed Leo back to her, " ISN'T IT ME who should be the one apologising to you...I was an idiot...sorry about causing all that grief with you and Paddy..."

They both headed up the road talking more at ease with each other...maybe the first time they ever had...Aaron was pleased, making amends with Rhona would certainly get him back into Paddy's good books...show him that he WAS putting everything behind him...he smiled as they reached the cafe...Paddy was certainly not going to expect this today!

XxX

Over at Dale head, Joe had just given Jackson his shower and was finishing off dressing him, "There you are...ALL clean, and smelling fresh again" told Joe wiping his hands with a towel.

Jackson gave him a dirty look, " thanks for that!...you make me sound like a bit of carpet or something that you've just washed and vac'd..."

"sorry about that mate...do you want me to get you your breakfast" asked Joe, dumping the towel on top of a growing pile of cardboard boxes.

Jackson nodded his head, " nah, you're all right, me mum can do that, when she gets back in from the shops...you can get off now, don't need you any more today!" he told with a sarcastic grin.

Joe shrugged, as he grabbed his bag, " oh I see, you want rid of me while your mum's out do you...so you can get back on to those porn sites...your eyes'll fall out!, ", he joked, Joe then noticed at a glance, Aaron's picture on the windowsill and it made him remember something, " oh I saw Aaron the other day..."

Jackson was looking at the TV screen, as the credits to THIS MORNING started to roll out, "that were nice for yah..."

Joe shrugged, Jackson didn't seem interested, and was about to go out the door, when Jackson rolled his head to face him, "what was he doing... he was alright, was he" he asked.

Joe smiled, he KNEW Jackson was interested to know more...

"yeah...he seemed okay mate, he said he was coming to see you...at some point" Joe finished.

Jackson rolled his head back to the TV, " well I'm STILL waiting...typical Aaron, never could rely on him"

Joe knew how hard this was still for Jackson, he knew how much the lad loved Aaron, "oh well, you're just have to go on that laptop and join up on the internet dating, like me!"

Jackson wasn't impressed, and his face showed it, " WHAT!...I'll rather someone shoot me first!...YOU may be desparate mate, but that's not for me!"

Joe sensed the conversation was over, " alright then...look, i'll see yah tomorrow"

Jackson didn't look at him, but he pulled a half smile in acknowledgment, Joe nodded and the door banged behind him, Jackson's head rolled and he focused toward his laptop...his mind ticking.

Outside Joe was heading over to his car, when he saw Hazel coming up the road with the shopping, " hey wanta hand" Joe asked.

Hazel shook her head, " nah you're okay, just bought in some cleaning products to give the place a good going over..."

Joe watched her head up the slope, and turn, " I hope he's been behaving himself for yah"

He nodded, " you know what he's like, he'll be, as he'll be...I see you've been busy getting everything packed up"

Hazel fished out her key, " Yeah...Jerry's ment to be coming round with the van this afternoon when he's finished work...i've sweet talked the council into giving me the key to the new place for a couple of hours" she told.

Joe opened his car door, " well...if you need a hand with carting them boxes around, I don't mind helping out..."

Hazel pushed open the front door, and laughed at him, " careful...I might have to take you up on that offer...I'll see you later..."

XxX

Paddy came into the front room of Smithy cottage, and saw Aaron standing at the window rocking baby Leo in his arms, Aaron turned and could instantly see the inquizitive gaze spread across Paddy's face.

Aaron smiled, "it's alright Pads, Rhona is all right with me holding him...me and her have sorted things out"

Paddy stepped forward, " oh right!...so you and her have cleared the air then...well I must say, I wasn't expecting that!"

Aaron looked at Leo, who was now asleep in his arms, " It's nice to know I can still keep you on yah toes...even IF it's the LAST thing you would expect from me!"

Paddy waved his hands out to him, " no, no...it's not that, it's nice to know you and Rhona have cleared the air...that's ALL i ever wanted, was for you and her to get on"

Aaron knew that being nice to Rhona was important to Paddy...and if he was to be honest, he had made life hard for her in the days before he moved out...

But it couldn't go on...he had to put things right, especially with other aspects of his life now starting to looking up.

Aaron handed the baby over to Paddy's open arms, " here, you take him...I'll even let Rhona think YOU stopped him from crying, if you like" he told.

Paddy held Leo, the baby was indeed sound asleep...he smiled, and looked up to Aaron, "She's not that stupid!...you could always send this little one to sleep since we first brought him home" he stood there rocking Leo gently before changing the subject, it just seemed the right time to ask him, "...errr...your mum said that you were... sort of , well...you know"

Aaron sat down on the armchair , and looked up to him with a knowing smile , " oh yeah, she NEVER could keep her trap shut, her!"

Paddy gently rocked Leo, trying to keep to Aaron's rhythm, "well, you KNOW what she's like...she's just made up for yah, that's all"

Aaron leaned forward, " made up about what...come on Paddy what has she been saying"

Paddy got abit tongue tied, " well...you know...your errrr...your new bloke", he broke off with a nervous cough.

Aaron was just nodding his head, and stood up, " it's EARLY days Paddy..."

Paddy smiled at him, "well, your mum says he seems a nice lad...you deserve someone nice...especially after..."

Aaron stood up, "ARE you, erm... SAYING that Jackson wasn't nice...", this got Paddy even more tongue tied, in fact he was becoming flustered, " errrrr...no I didn't mean that... I were sort of saying that...well..."

Aaron slapped a hand onto Paddy's shoulder and broke into a smile, and amazingly the slap didn't even disturb Leo, "it's ALRIGHT Paddy, I'm only messing with yah...look, just leave me to sort my own life out, yeah... i've gotta get back to work...I'll see yah later"

Paddy watched him go, he felt a warm feeling glow around him...Aaron was SO easy going at the moment...it seemed that the last few weeks had never happened...that day, the day he nearly...

but...if he was truely honest about things, it DID worry him...HAPPY Aaron was rare!...VERY HAPPY Aaron was even rarer...he couldn't help thinking that it was just all a front...and he also couldn't help thinking about WHAT really was going off in that head of his.

Afterall, Aaron had been through alot...what he nearly did to Jackson was the sort of thing that would stay in anybody's mind...was it THAT easy for Aaron to just bury and forget about it.

Happy Aaron or not...he was going to be keeping a close eye...just in case...

XxX

Hazel rubbed her hands together, as Dale head was getting more and more cluttered with boxes, while Jackson laid on his bed, he could just about watch the TV, between two towers of boxes.

"blimey!...we only moved in here last Christmas, I can't THINK where all this clutters come from" she cooed with a smile.

Jackson turned his head, but his eyes were still fixed to the TV screen, " It's ALL YOUR clutter...NOT mine...You're be able to shove all MY stuff in one of them bin liners" he told.

Hazel wasn't listening to him, she was trying to find the phone, " I need to call your father, he said he would be round to help us make a start, with moving some of this stuff"

Jackson nodded his head toward the direction of the window, " ...it's over there on the windowsill you silly mare...remember, when you were rabbiting on to Aunt Polly last night about our move..."

Hazel made her way through the maze of boxes, and leaned over to grab hold of it, " oh yeah...YOU'VE got a good memory!"

Jackson faced her, and shook his head, " not really Mum, while you were NATTERING ON to her, I were trying to watch THAT documentary, remember...!", He then pulled his eyebrowes together, "...no, on second thoughts DON'T try to...BECAUSE I THINK YAH BRAIN MUST BE SHRINKING OR SOMMIT!""

Again, Hazel wasn't listening, as she was tapping Jerry's mobile number onto the phone, "I tell you what love, HE better be answering this call, or there's gonna be trouble...", she then looked out the window, and clicked off the phone...her lips thinning.

XxX

Jerry reversed the van up outside the house...Hazel was already running down the slope...face like a bulldog chewing on a wasp, " and WHAT time to you call THIS then..."

Jerry jumped out of the van, " I got held up at work, so don't start..." he told, Hazel started to pull open the vans back doors, " well it's getting LATE Jerry...blimey, the council have only let us have the keys to the new place for a couple of hours...I was hoping to get most of it shifted!"

Jerry was all calm, and waved out his hand, " stop panicking woman, it'll ALL get done..."

Hazel touched her cheek at an after thought, " and Bob was ment to be giving us hand as well, god knows what's happened to him...it's a good job Joe's volenteered to help us out"

Jerry nodded, " yeah, Jackson told me on the phone that he rehired him...all a bit bizzare isn't it...getting rid of him one minute, and having him back the next" he remarked.

Hazel certainly didn't want to get into THAT conversation...so she shrugged it off, "well you know WHAT HE'S like...he changes his mind like the wind!", she then started back up the slope, " well come on, chop, chop, we haven't got all day!"

XxX

Aaron had watched the van being loading up from the garage, they even were still at it when he was locking up for Cain, he saw Bob and Joe carting more boxes out of Dale Head.

Aaron looked up the slope...and he could hear Jerry's voice...Jackson's dad inside...there was NO WAY he was gonna get into an arguement with him...so he quickly hurried away, placing his phone to his ear, " hey it's me...I got yah text earlier...meet me in the Woolie at 8, and we're go from there..."

Jackson wheeled down the slope, and just missed Aaron vanish out of sight, as he went into the pub, Jackson turned his chair around to gawp into the back of the open van, "uh oh!...them boxes are not stacked properly" he called.

Jerry and Bob were coming down the slope, " what was that..." asked Jerry, " SOME of us have been sweating like pigs doing this..." he pointed out.

Jackson raised his eyebrowes as he turned his chair to face them, " SOMEONE had to supervise, and THAT were me...no I'm telling dad...if you take them corners too sharp in that van, them boxes are gonna topple...and then" he trailed off, turning around to put put his back to them.

Jerry hated it when his son was right...and Jackson LIKED being all cocky about it, " OH STUFF this...lets just leave your mum and Joe to it, and go grab a pint!"

Jackson beamed a smile and lead the way in his chair, " NOW you're talking...Joe will be alright with mum, he GOES ON like an old woman anyway!"

Bob felt bad, " maybe we should warn her...tell her where we're going"

Jackson called back to him, " you can't do THAT Bob, you're be buying the round in!"

Xxx

At the Woolpack Aaron sat at the bar, the door opened, and Jackson rolled in, Bob and Jerry with him, Chas came forward, " That's all we need" she muttered.

Aaron looked up to her, " it's alright mum...no more bad feeling a...I'VE MOVED ON, remember...so IF I speak to him...it's because we're still mates..."

Chas didn't like the sound of that, but she wasn't about to let Aaron know her concerns...she said she would no longer interfere...and she was sticking to her word.

Aaron eased off the bar stool with his pint in his hand, he approached the table in the corner where Jackson instantly spotted him...although if Jackson was to be honest, his eyes were searching for him as soon as they entered the pub, " 'ELLO STRANGER!" he cried out in jest...that silly grin on his face...a grin disguising allsorts of restraint feelings.

Aaron raised his eyebrowes in acknowledge, as he held his pint, " alright mate...sorry about not coming round...i've been sorta busy..."

Jackson gave him one of his trademark winks, "ohhhhhh, I bet you have..." he teased, " but don't worry about it..."

Aaron stepped forward, " no, it's just that..."

"IT'S ARIGHT!...you don't have to explain" smiled Jackson, trying to get Aaron to ease off the quilt.

Aaron changed the subject, "you all ready for the off then" he asked.

Jackson spoke through the grin, " Monday is D Day...me mum managed to borrow the key to the new place so we could fetch some of our stuff over there..."

Bob laughed, " is that the royal we, I hear!"

Aaron laughed, then saw Jerry glaring at him from over at the bar, " I see your dad is pleased to see me as ever..."

Jackson's turned his gaze over to his father, then looked up to Aaron, "relax...he won't be having a go at yah, he knows he's not too... HE will NEVER understand what you went through...what I made you do..."

Aaron didn't want to think about that AGAIN!...and Bob was sure there was something cryptic there...but maybe that was Aaron being paranoid.

Aaron looked at Jackson...there eyes met...but Jackson had failed to keep hold of Aaron's gaze, because Aaron was distracted by a lad coming into the pub...his new bloke...of course Jackson KNEW he had a new bloke...his Mum had tried to keep it from him...but he mightn't be able to move from the shoulders down, but there was nothing wrong with his eyesight, he knew...he knew Aaron.

Aaron smiled at this lad...and their eyes met...and Jackson knew at that instant that he had lost Aaron forever...the most painful thing of all, was that Aaron looked at that lad like he USED TO look at him...

Aaron suddenly looked down to Jackson, as if he had suddenly forgotten about him " sorry mate...it's just..."

Jackson turned to look over at Callum at the bar, " is that him...your new fella...he seems fit...I could DO HIM myself..." he said in an flirty manner.

Aaron swallowed...he hated talking to Jackson about other blokes...

"he's just a..."

Jackson broke him off, and looked up at Aaron as if to say, I'm not stupid, " HE'S MORE than that...I'm not blind..."

Aaron just stood there, stock still, so it was up to Jackson to act, he nodded his head forward " go ON then...go to him...don't go and keep yah new fella waiting..."

Aaron looked at him unsurely...not believing how good he was all about this, but Jackson forced on a big toothy grin, " look I'm smiling...I'm okay with it...I'm soooo pleased to see you getting ON with your life...it's ALLLL I've ever wanted for yah...you deserve it mate!" he reasured.

Aaron turned his head to face Callum, who reacted by nodded his head back at him with a gorgeous smile.

Aaron looked back at Jackson, Jackson's eyes were sparkling, he didn't know what else to say.

" it's about time you had some happiness in yah life...grab it while you can!"", Aaron could detect a little bit of sincerity in Jackson's tone...he ment it...Jackson wanted him to be with Callum...

And turning his back on Jackson...he stepped to the bar to be with Callum...Callum looked fit...

"I were thinking, how would you like to go out bowling... I mean, we don't have to, if you THINK it's abit too uncool for you" Callum laughed.

Aaron shook his head, as he finished his beer, " yeah sounds great...", and without thinking he placed his hand over Callum's, Jackson was looking right over...and a split second after, he forced his gaze to the floor.

Jerry glared at Aaron as he brought the beers over to Bob and Jackson, "I see it didn't take him long!" he remarked through gritted teeth, Jackson was watching Aaron and Callum again, his heart racing...as they talked amongst themselves, lost in each others flirtious gazes.

Jackson was putting on a brave face...this was so hard, watching Aaron falling for another bloke right in front of him...

Just three more days till they moved out of Dale Head...Three days till they left the village...then the pain would be gone...and he would never have to see Aaron Livesy again...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...It really sounds like most of you want Aaron to stay with Callum...IS THAT REALLY TRUE! ...XX

Aaron laid back on his bed...today was the day...today was the day Jackson was leaving his life for good...

He hadn't slept that much in the night...he kept on thinking about the time they had together...whether it was before or after the accident.

One thing that did crop up in his never ending thoughts, was that on a sunlit september day last year, on the lawn outside Smithy cottage, Jackson Walsh had told him, that he loved him...

He didn't know what love was back then...and it was ALL THAT which eventually led to...

That day was nearly a year ago...

But he did know now...what love was...and he knew deep down he would never quite love ANYONE like he did Jackson.

He rolled his head to face the photo that sat on his unit beside his bed, WHEN would that love fade, WHEN will he be able to go to sleep, and wake up again, with out Jackson being the last thing he thought about at night, and the first thing he thought about in the morning...

That was love for you...

And he hated it sometimes...because loving someone so much, still could make you feel the loneiest person alive.

He glanced at the clock next to the photo, it was alittle after 8...maybe he SHOULDN'T see him...maybe that was the answer...Paddy once said that goodbyes can be the hardest thing...so without a goodbye , then he'd be okay...

...wouldn't he...

XXx

For Hazel Rhodes and Jackson Walsh, however...it was D Day.

It was Monday 1st August...the day their lives would change for good, as they were about to leave the village behind them forever.

Hazel came out of Dale Head, and hurried down the slope to the Van, " That's It!.. that's the last one" she told, giving Jerry the box in her grasp.

Jerry made sure everything was all secure in the van, Jackson would only moan at him otherwise, about it being an unsecure load, when did his son become so anal about things.

"what's WITH HIM today!" Jerry asked, closing up the van, glancing toward the house, " I said to him about going to that football match next saturday, and he practically bit me head off!"

Hazel sadly shook her head, " yep!, he's been like a bear with a sore head since he woke up...thank your lucky stars you haven't had the brunt of it"

Jerry couldn't think why Jackson was behaving so mardy, " but I thought he was looking forward to the move...he was happy as larry about it on Friday...infact you couldn't get him to shut up about it!"

Hazel couldn't believe how thick Jerry could be at times, " FOR GOD'S SAKE, THINK ABOUT IT JERRY...you don't have to be taking TOO MANY wild guesses, why" she told him.

It took Jerry a few moments to register what she was going on about, he looked at her, "WHAT!...HIM...that thug of an ex mate of his...WHY doesn't HE not listen us, I swear, it goes in one ear and out the other...I'VE told him he's better off with out him!"

Hazel was shaking her head, " when DOES HE ever listen to anything we say!...when it comes down to Aaron he won't listen to anybody...he's blinkered...you just have to let him deal with it himself"

Jerry didn't like the sound of that, " look, why don't I go and have another word with him...", he suggested, Hazel stopped him from walking back up the slope, " LEAVE HIM...he'll be okay...once he's out of this Village he'll be fine...now get going...Bob and Joe will be waiting at the new place with the keys to let you in" she had tried to sound convincing, but deep down she KNEW what this move was doing to her son.

Jerry nodded at her, " alright, but if you get any more grief from his nibs in there, ring me...I'll see you over at the new place..."

Hazel smiled, and watched Jerry jump into the drivers seat, and after turning the engine, he beeped twice and set off.

Hazel watched the van pull away, then turned to see Chas faffing around with a black sack outside the Woolpack...Hazel thought she better be polite, and smiled at her, but Chas's returning gaze was like ice...

Xxx

Diane came out of the pub, and saw Chas watching Hazel disappear back into Dale Head, "so, not long now then" she remarked, "Bob were saying yesterday the move was today"

Chas shook her head, "yep, and it can't of come soon enough for me, Diane, AS SOON as them pair are gone, MY Aaron can start to pick himself up again"

Diane frowned at her, as she wiped the front courts wooden table and bench, "but I thought your Aaron was seeing another lad"

Chas smiled at her, " yeah he is, but it can't be easy for him with THEM pair sticking their oars in every chance they get, it'll be...better all round...I never liked HER anyway, stuck up cow" she said of Hazel.

Chas looked across to Dale Head one more time, then went back into the pub...today to her couldn't be a more better day...

Xxx

Aaron sat in the bar, it was now past 10, Diane came in from the back after doing an order for some new ale, " hey, if you sit in that empty bar any longer, I might put them mussles of yours to some use, pet!" she chirped.

Aaron turned and pulled her a face, " what..."

"The Dray man's due, there'll be plenty of barrels of ale to be rolled down to that cellar kiddo...", Aaron stood up, not looking at her, " no tar, I'll just go to my room thanks..."

Diane watched him, as he made his way round to the back of the bar...he looked rough, beard growth that you wouldn't believe, and clothes he possibly slept in...

"you might feel better if you say goodbye to him..." told the landlady.

Aaron stopped in his tracks, and screwed up his face, " and HOW do you figure that out!"

Diane came to the bar, her sympathy made known to him, " because young man, YOU might regret it one day...it'll be something you can't go back and put right..."

Aaron thought about it...but only for a few seconds, " Nah...I've got better things to do than wishing off them pair...good ridence I say!", he then bolted up the stairs, Diane sighed out loud, young people...why did they do things that they would ALWAYS later regret...

XxX

Jackson sat in his wheelchair, as he waited at the foot of the slope outside Dale Head, Hazel was at the head of the slope at the front door on her mobile,chasing the disabled transport...it had NOT turned up and was late!

Jackson rolled his eyes as he could hear his mum going on and on to some poor sole down the phone.

Jackson's big brown eyes focused on the Woolpack, they were showing just how desparate he was getting, as he continuedly muttered, " come on, come on, come on..."

But no one was coming out from the pub...it was all empty and quiet...WAS he even IN THERE...or was he with his new fella...not that he would blame him, but it was hard to think about SOMEOTHER lad touching HIS Aaron, at one time he'd go and warn them off...but how could ANYONE take him seriously now...

His eyes hit the ground, why hadn't he come, why didn't he even want to say goodbye to him...did he mean THAT LITTLE to him now...that he didn't even care...

Hazel slammed the front door shut and posted the keys through the letter box...she stood looking up at the house for a few sad moments...she had taken one last wander around inside...it looked strange with everything all clinical and bare now...it had been home for a while...some 8 or 9 months...now it was time to start afresh again...

she turned on her heel to see Jackson staring toward the pub...SHE KNEW who he was thinking about...why did he put himself through this...why did he have to make all this hard on himself...

She looked at her watch, the transport was no where in sight...and she was now taking odds with herself to WHAT OR WHO would turn up first...Aaron, or the transport.

Jackson wasn't aware his mother was gazing down at him, his sad brown eyes were STILL trying to hold out some hope that HE would come...he HAD too...ALL what they've been through together the last year or so...he just had too...

Xxx

Chas sat at the kitchen table at Smithy, Paddy brought the two mugs of tea over, "ohhhhh Paddy, do you think we did the right thing, making Aaron turn his back on Jackson..."

Paddy wasn't feeling quite so bad about it, " YES I do actually...THAT LAD...what he had Aaron do...I'm surprized it hasn't effected him MORE that it has..."

Chas watched him sit and smiled, " but he has that new lad now, Callum...surely that's a good sign that he's moved on, and he was just saying to me yesterday that he was thinking of going back to college...SURELY it's a good sign that he's put ALL THAT behind him...isn't it"

Paddy shrugged, " I hope so Chas...but you know Aaron, he's good at hiding stuff...JUST WHAT WE'VE RECENTLY LEARNT...we still have to keep an eye him...just in case..."

Chas placed her hands around her mug, and sighed, " THEY are leaving the village today...I don't think he's gonna even say goodbye to them...

Paddy sipped his tea, " I think that it can only be a GOOD thing...putting some distance between himself and...Jackson..."

"I hope so Paddy...I just want ALL this to go away...HE was being SO GOOD lately, I just don't want all this today to cause him a set back that's all..."

Paddy smiled at her, and took her hand, " it will ALL work out just fine...and if not...than he's got us...we're get him through it..."

XxX

Over at the Woolpack, Aaron came down the stairs and came to a stop at the bottom step, he took in a few deep breaths, and made for the back door.

Aaron could hear the transport outside Dale Head the instant he left the pub, he hurried up main street to see the Taxi at the foot of the slope, Aaron dug his hands in his hoodie pockets and just stared at it from some distance away.

Jackson was already in the back, his front facing him...but Jackson was looking to his lap...he looked so sad...Aaron felt his heart beating...he quickly experienced a sudden rush of emotion overwhelm him as he suddenly found himself sprinting toward the transport...afraid it would simply vanish in front of his eyes.

Inside the Taxi, Jackson suddenly snapped his head up...it was as if he could sense he was there, through watery eyes, he managed a smile for him, " Aaron..." he gasped, barely audible, just about hiding the relief of seeing him...

Aaron came forward, and stopped a few yards away from the taxi, his expression on his face seemed relaxed...but Jackson could see seriousness in his eyes, " didn't think I wouldn't come and say goodbye to you, did yah!" he blurted out with a weak laugh.

"I thought you might, not that I could've blamed yah...besides, you might've had better things to do..." told Jackson, trying not to look into Aaron's blue eyes.

Aaron felt choked at hearing Jackson's voice...he was losing his calm stance...he rubbed his hand over his head, and stepped closer to the van, " well...bye then..."

Jackson sadly smiled, typical Aaron...not wanting to show TO MUCH emotion to him, Jackson looked up, " are you just gonna be standing there, don't I even get a goodbye kiss from yah" he began hopefully, " or doesn't your new fella like you kissing other blokes!" he finsihed in jest, plastering on a brave smile.

Aaron nodded, and came forward...it was pretty awkward in the back of the transport...the door, the ramp...the hoist thing...but Aaron managed to place his head on to Jackson's shoulder...brushing eachother with their cheeks...Aaron wanted to stay there forever, buried in Jackson's neck, it felt good...he smelled good...that aftershave always made him...

But it was just memories now...

Jackson could feel the wet tears on his neck, " don't cry Aaron...you're set ME off otherwise" he told bravely.

Aaron stayed there for a few moments...then gradually pulled away, wiping his wet face with his hands...Their eyes met, Jackson's eyes were all smiley now, and Aaron moved in and kissed Jackson on the lips...

One last kiss...Jackson's goodbye kiss...

As Aaron pulled away, Jackson on the verge of crying, " Aaron...I..."

Aaron quickly stopped him from finishing his sentence, by placing his fingers to Jackson's lips...Aaron held their gaze..." I know..." he whispered, knowing exactly what his Ex boyfriend was about to say...he then backed out of the transport, and turned his back on it..." you can close it up now, mate..." Aaron told.

This wasn't just Aaron facing a new life without Jackson, Jackson was facing a new life without Aaron...

Jackson was looking on in horror, as the Taxi driver was closing up the transport, Aaron turned around and they held their gaze one last time...through the glass...

and then Aaron broke their gaze...and ran...

XXx

Chas was coming out of Smithy with Paddy, when she saw Aaron bolt up the road, Paddy looked up main street to see the transport pull away from Dale head...Hazel was in the passenger seat next to the driver...she smiled at Paddy...and waved.

Paddy acknowledged her with sad smile...ONCE they had a great friendship, when she was at her darkest hours, after the accident...but now...it was all just a shame...

"see...even NOW they upset him!" cried Chas waving her hand after the taxi, she was then pulling out her mobile, " he's gonna be in a right state after this!..."

Paddy turned, " do you want me to go after him..."

"and SAY what paddy..." she shook her head, holding up the phone, " no...I'm gonna phone that Callum...he'll know what to do...he'll make sure he's alright..."

Xxx

Aaron ran up main street, the tears making his eyes sting like mad, his heart raced so fast it threatened to beat right out of his chest, and he pushed himself more and more...like that day...like the day when he nearly killed him.

Aaron lept over the fense and pushed himself even harder, as he raced up the fields passing the cricket pallivon, his sobs were turning him to gasps, as he tried to fight for air to breath...the stitch in his side was now getting to him, so it made him knock down the pace a tad.

The Village was below, in the valley...and movement caught his vision, it were the disabled taxi, it was trundling along the narrow road out of the village, only stopping once to let the bus pass by.

"JACKSON, JACKSON!" Aaron screamed as he raced down the hill, but the Taxi was getting further and further away...Aaron couldn't go on, he stopped almost at once...the pain in his side was killing his, and his lungs felt like they were on fire.

He placed his hands onto his knee caps panting, and looked up as he tried to catch his breath back, the Taxi was no longer in sight, it was gone forever...Jackson was gone forever.

Aaron couldn't stand the pain inside him...the loss of him...hitting him hard, like someone had smacked him in the face.

he took in air, and tried to settle his heartbeat...he could still FEEL and hear it pump inside his chest.

Not to mention the emotional heartbreak...he could FEEL that too.

Completely defeated, he sat down onto the grass...the sweat was running into his eyes from his forehead, making his eyes sting even more, he stared at the road below...and then looked down between his knees, as he pulled them up to his chest...Jackson was gone...he REALLY WAS GONE...the tears ran down his cheeks again...he couldn't face going back to the village just yet...face his Mum...having to tell her, how he was experiancing for the first time in his life a broken heart...she wouldn't understand...she wanted him to hate him for what he made him do...forcing him to help him in his suicide plan.

But Aaron could no longer hate him...he NEVER would hate him...never ever...

He sniffed, and tried to gather himself together...

He'd sit here for a bit...then go and face them...face the reality of life how it was going to be now...without Jackson.

XxX

Aaron had already come back, by the time Callum pulled up outside the woolpack in his tractor, he had received a call from Chas, Aaron's mum...she had sounded pretty concerned for Aaron.

Callum jumped out the tractor, and looked up to the pub, Aaron's ex had left the village today...and it would have been hard on him.

Callum wasn't a bad natured person...he didn't hold anything against anyone...but he was glad Jackson was gone...Aaron was his now...well NOT HIS...but his responsibility now, NOT Jacksons.

He took in a breath and headed toward the pub.

Xxx

Aaron sat at the bar, he stared into his pint...it felt like the world was laying heavy upon his shoulders, the release of his emotions had done little to the great emptiness that he now felt inside him.

Chas kept looking up to him from behind the bar, she knew today was devastating for him, and she knew that there was nothing SHE could say, or do to take away his pain...the loss of someone so important to her son...even though she no longer held that status to Jackson Walsh...at one time he was the light of her son's life...now he was like a dark shadow, that had been stopping Aaron from getting on with his life...

Diane placed a kindly hand on her shoulder, " you alright pet, I'm sure he'll be alright, AS THEY SAY, tomorrow is another day" she reasured glancing over to Aaron.

Chas sighed at her, " I hope so Diane...I know today was hard for him...harder than anything he's had to ever face...but I feel glad as well...glad that he can now concentrate on HIS life and not..."

Diane smiled at her, "as i've said, he'll be right as rain tomorrow...it's amazing what a good night sleep can do"

Chas glanced over to Aaron...her poor boy hunched over his pint...she was about to approach, when she saw Callum come through the doors...she smiled...he'll sort him out...he'll know what to say to him...not make a hash of things like she always did.

Aaron didn't see Callum at first...after all, he had no reason to even expect him today, he hadn't texted or called him.

When Callum placed a hand onto Aaron's upper back...he flinched...and after snapped his neck round to look him, he pulled a face, "What are you doing here!"

Callum stood beside him, where Aaron sat at the bar, " your Mum called me...said you might want someone to talk to..."

Aaron shook his head, as he continued to stare down into his pint, " SHE really doesn't know when to keep her big fat trap shut, does she!

Callum bit his lip, glancing up to Chas...but she wasn't gonna make it obvious that she called him, even though he had already let the cat out the bag.

"look...she were worried about yah...you ran off...and she was afraid you might have done something stupid..." began Callum, trying to stick up for his mother, Aaron looked at him...his face was bemused, " What did she think I were gonna do!...I NOT that stupid...yeah I were upset, but I'm okay now"

Callum raised his eyebrowe, " you don't look okay...", Aaron forced out a heavy sigh, and turned, "I'm fine!...I just want to have a quiet drink on me own...I just want some time to..."

Callum sensed that Aaron really DID want to be let alone, he gently placed his hand onto the top of Aaron's, " look...I leave you be...call me tomorrow when you want that chat, yeah", Aaron swallowed down the lump in his throat, the last thing he wanted to do today was upset Callum, he swung around on the stool, " Callum wait...I...I'm sorry if I'm being all mardy with yah...it's just that...look, I promise you... it's gonna be better for us from now on""

Callum smiled, and shook his head at him, " I understand Aaron...today WAS HARD for yah...and it's gonna take some time to get used to...but, I'm still here...things will turn out great you're see, I just want you to know that...I'm ALWAYS here for yah..."

Callum said no more, with a final nod, he was back out the doors leaving his boyfriend to quietly finish his pint in peace.

XxX

Later on Aaron had retired upstairs, his mum had kept looking over at him, and no doubt she would of wanted to know why Callum hadn't stayed for long.

He laid back on his bed and stared up at the ceiling...today felt unreal now...he had laid there that morning thinking about whether he could face saying goodbye to him...and now, 12 hours later...he was long gone.

The clock radio was on, and it was that song again...Example...Love kickstarts again...why did tunes ALWAYS set your mind casting back...to another place, another time.

His mobile jingled, and he went and grabbed it from the side table, just for a split second he hoped it would be...

he looked at the display, it was a text from Callum : **:)**

A smiley face!, was he trying to be funny!...although he did think that in jest.

He smiled, and as he turned his head he saw his Mum standing in the doorway, he huffed at her, rolled over, putting his back to her, " AM I EVER GONNA BE ABLE TO GET SOME PEACE ROUND HERE!"

Chas stepped in, " I'm on me break...I were just abit worried about you...and thought I'd look in on yah"

"CHECKING UP on me, more like"

Chas shook her head, and folded her arms, " yeah maybe I am...I just want to keep an eye on you THAT'S ALL...you are me son, I want to"

Aaron rolled his eyes, and glared at her, " no you're NOT!...YOU just want to know WHY Callum never stayed long...it' s ALLRIGHT, HE told me why you called him!"

Chas was biting her tongue, she was only showing him she cared for him, and he always throw it BACK into her face...after EVERYTHING that had happened.

"I'm NOT apologising for showing THAT I CARE!" she said raising her voice sharply.

Aaron sat up, he was gonna give her a right tongue lashing, and Chas could see that he was, so she waved her hand and went to turn away, "save it!...I'LL just GO shall I...I don't deserve this Aaron"

Aaron felt bad, he was het up, but he had things on his mind...he seemed to realise that all his mother wanted, was to talk to him, the lump in his throat rose up, as he blurted out after her, " MUM, why didn't he fight for me..."

Chas stopped in her tracks, and turned around...Aaron was still sitting on his bed, and framed by the doorway, " why didn't he fight for me mum...folk thought I was the one looking after him...but it were the other way round...EVEN IN THAT CHAIR...he were still looking after ME!""

Chas stepped forward, seeing the tear rolling down her son's cheek, she couldn't answer him...she didn't know how too...

Aaron was now facing the carpet, " he used to..." he began, talking between sobs, " when we went to bar west...before the accident... I would get chatted up by blokes...because I were new" he smiled through the tears remembering, as Chas sat next to him, and listened as he continued, " ...and he would get all jealous...I could see it in his eyes, but he would NEVER admit to it...but I know he warned them all off...saying I was WITH HIM..."

Chas still didn't know what this all ment, Aaron looked up to her, " it's because he loved me...and I didn't know he did back then...and now, and now it's all gone...he's gone"

Chas tilted her head at him, " what are you trying to say to me, babe..."

"Friday...downstairs in the bar...I was with Callum...and he just looked up at us...he even said he was HAPPY for me..." told Aaron, starting to pull himself together.

"THAT'S good isn't it...he DOES CARE, he wouldn't have said that otherwise...", she smiled at him, " if HE'S happy for you, YOU have to be happy for you too!...Callum seems a really good kid, YOU could do alot worse believe me...don't go spoiling things for yourself"

Aaron didn't look at her, he just shook his head slowly, acknowledging what she said, they sat in silence for a few moments, before Aaron looked up, " when will it go away...when will I not love Jackson anymore...because I just want it to go away now...I just want the pain to go away mum!" he started sobbing again, and Chas pulled her son into her arms, she was crying to, feeling his pain, " it will son, it'll take some time to...but it will..."

"I just want it gone now" he sobbed.

Chas was helpless to help him, as she sat there with him crying in her arms...she WANTED SO MUCH to take away the pain, but she couldn't...

Even though it offers no comfort...but Like everything in life...time is a good healer.

THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL JUMP ON TO REAL TIME FROM AUGUST TO OCTOBER...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...The end of this story is not set in stone...so you might get what you've hoped for...although whether that's Aaron being with Jackson or Callum, you're still have to wait and see...!

Here's the latest chapter...PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! xx

It was another cloudy October day, the wind was gusty, and it was getting darker and darker with every friday Aaron Livesy left college.

He clutched his rucksack strap over his shoulder, and pushed his moped along beside him, and headed over the grass toward the road, his mind was filled with thoughts about just how boring College was...it was his 8th week now...but, what he DIDN'T know about a motor, could be scribbled on the back of a postage stamp...but if it kept EVERYBODY happy...he just as well stick at it.

Plus he didn't want to stay at Cain and Debbie's garage all his life...he wanted to move on to bigger and better things...to be taken seriously as a machanic, not just some casual grease monkey.

As he was lost in his daydream, he didn't even notice the car pull up onto the curb in front of him, and as Aaron sat up on his moped, and was about to kickstart it, the horn beeped twice.

Aaron was seething, as he swung his head round, and removed his crash helmet.

NO ONE beeped at him and got away with it.

But the face grinning at him from the car behind him, instantly calmed him down, he jumped off the moped and came to the car's window, " WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!" he cried.

Callum looked up at him from the drivers window, " I thought I'd come and pick you up, since that your bike was messing you around this morning..."

Aaron smirked at him, " you're a right div, do you know that!...I've fixed it at College, I told you I would, didn't I... it kills the boredom...YOU just want to use my bike, as an excuse to show off..." he pointed out.

Callum smirked, he knew he'd been sussed out...YES, he WAS showing off...he had bought the car a few days ago...a little sporty number...and he knew how much Aaron loved fast cars..

" Ohhhhh, COME ON!...ADMIT IT...You're impressed with it, aren't yah..." Callum said with a crack of a smile, Aaron raised his eyebrowes at him, as to say 'as if'

But Callum had a card up his sleeve, he leaned down, and switched on the car stereo, Aaron widened his eyes...now he WAS impressed... with the sound system anyway...

And Callum could see it shine through his otherwise, blank gaze, " SEE, YOU ARE IMPRESSED!"

Aaron sighed at him, and leaned in through the window, giving the car's inside a once over, he then turned and faced him, " I'll tell you what...I'll TELL YOU my opinion on this motor...if you let ME drive her to your new place..."

Callum screwed up his face, " what!...and I get left behind with your pop pop bike over there...DREAM ON, MISTER!"

Aaron laughed, " it were worth a try...go on, get it home...I'll meet you at your new place...in about an hour" he said looking over to his moped...

Callum nodded, and put his foot down, and with a screech of the tyres...the car sped up the street...Aaron WAS disppointed, why did he have a problem with him giving it a spin...but as he sat on his bike, and pulled on his crash helmet...he realised about the day he nearly crashed a clients car into his tractor...

...that was sure to do with it...!

Xxx

"...So what do you think, it's the first time you've seen it" said Callum as they came up the stairs of the house share.

Aaron looked around, the place was alright he supposed, but he couldn't see himself living with strangers, like Callum did.

Callum went across the hallway, and unlocked a wood pannelled door, " here we are, HOME sweet home..."

Aaron stepped in, his eyes gazing around the room, it was quite large, bigger than he expected, he shrugged, as he dumped his ruck sack and crash helmet on to Callum's bed, "yeah, this is top mate" he mumbled, although he only half thought it.

And Callum could tell, by the look on his face, and the tone of his voice, " yeah, yeah...I know it's abit of a dump, but it's better than shacking up with me mum and dad on the farm...at least now, they HAVE me during work hours, and after...I get to have a life of me own!" he slumped on to the bed, "No more getting me up in the middle of the night, because the barn roofs been blown away, or having to miss out on a party, because dad has let the paid farm hand GO HOME, and have me doing the overtime for free..."

Aaron could understand that...there were times in the past at the garage, when Cain would have HIM do a few extra hours for the family...and let the paid help go home...family could REALLY take advantage!

Aaron looked out the window, and turned, " so new room, new car...you're be wanting a new bloke next!" he smiled in jest.

Callum jumped up and grabbed him, and tried to pull him into a cuddle, " WHAT!...me trade YOU in...never!

Aaron screwed his face up, as he tried to pull away from him, " flaming 'eck Callum, you reek of cow shit!", Callum started to smell himself, and looked up with a cheeky smile, " yeah I do don't I...look I'll go and grab meself a shower and you..." he went and handed him over a advert for Pizza, "...you can be going ordering them in!"

Aaron was impressed, he loved pizza, " nice one!...hurry up then, I'm starving me..."

Callum grabbed himself a towel from his pile of clean washing, and disappeared out into the hallway to use the shared bathroom, Aaron sat on the bed and pulled out his mobile...for a few moments he stared at the display, his wallpaper was STILL showing an image of Jackson skydiving...he rubbed his thumb over it gently, before taking in a deep breath and scrolled down to the delete button...his finger hovered over it for a few more seconds, before he pressed..it was more of a reflex...he gasped...it was GONE!...and he couldn't retreath it...

He looked up to the hallway, he could hear Callum singing in the shower, he could be such a div sometimes...just like Jackson was...

Where are you now...what are you doing now...

He wondered this sometimes...it was getting less and less frequent...but he still sometimes found himself still wondering...

Xxx

When he was all fresh and clean, Callum came back into the bedroom, and saw Aaron staring out the window, he smiled, " so...see anything out there you like, apart from the new motor of course..."

Aaron smirked, and turned around...Callum was standing in the doorway with nowt, but a towel around his waist...and he was smirking back at him cheekily, " what about in here..."

Aaron was looking at Callum directly in the face, but his eyes lowered to take in that fit muscular chest, " might be..." he whispered.

Callum came over...he knew he had to tread carefully when it came to sex...he remembered the first time they had done it...in a cornfield at his fathers farm back in August...it were a week or so after Jackson had left the village...Aaron had been shaking like a leaf...even in an 80 degree heat.

It had been his first time since Jackson...Jackson had been the FIRST and LAST person to touch him there...to do things to him...the fear had been there, he could see it in Aaron's eyes.

But Callum had been SO gentle and patient with him...

Now, it was getting better...Sex wasn't frequent as he would have liked...and he would always have to make the first move...but sex between them was good...very good.

He didn't have any complaints anyway...

Aaron came forward...and they looked into eachothers eyes...then Aaron moved in, and kissed Callum...the kiss getting more and more passionate as Callum began to pull off Aaron's sweat shirt... as they fell on to the bed...

Xxx

After woofing down the pizzas in the downstairs shared kitchen, Callum received a call from his mate, after ending the call he turned to Aaron who was disposing of the rubbish into the bin, "Hey...fancy going out..."

Aaron looked up at him, he glanced at his watch, " I were supposed to be meeting Paddy and Rhona in the woolie at half 7 to finalise Leo's christening arrangements...I've been asked to be his godparent remember!"

Callum pulled a disappointed face, " but it's friday night!...and Dean has invited us to his birthday bash at Bar West...come on Aaron, the christening is a couple of weeks away...call them to say you've been held up" he said, then he pulled a pleading smile, with the puppy dog eyes, " Plllleeeeaaaseee...for me"

Aaron sighed, and pulled out his mobile, " look...I'm telling yah now, If I get major grief off Rhona for this...you are the one going to be paying for it..." he said light heartedly.

Callum was pleased as punch, " great...while you do that, I text Dean and say we're be there for 8..."

XXx

Paddy finished the call where he sat in the woolpack, and Rhona could tell by the look on his face that Aaron wasn't going to show up.

"so WHERE is he then..." she cried, Paddy was flustered, " well, he...erm...says that he's been held up at College..."

Rhona found that SO HARD to believe, "WHAT...at THIS time...AND you believed him...", Paddy did find it hard to believe Aaron would be at college at this time, but he couldn't think for the life of him why Aaron would lie...he was so looking forward to being Leo's godfather.

Rhona stood up, and collected up her coat," well, I'm not sitting here all night...I'm going over to collect Leo from Marlon..."

Paddy pulled a sigh, "oh Rhona, don't be like that...he did say he'll see us later...arrange another time"

Rhona shook her head, "you know what, Paddy, I thought this was a bad idea...having HIM as godfather...how on earth are we going to even start to believe he'd be bothered about Leo, if something happened to us and Marlon...if he can't even be bothered about him now!"

Paddy thought it best not to argue the case, Rhona finished her drink and left the pub...

Bob came up to the bar to Brenda, just as Chas was pulling a pint for Andy, " Brenda, is it all right for you to go and babysit the twins...I've just had a call from Hazel, shes in a right state..."

Chas looked up when she heard Hazel's name mentioned...Brenda was finishing up her drink, "of course...i'd love to...so what's wrong...anything I can do..."

They were both heading to the pubs exit, " no...just a crisis with Jackson...but looking after the twins would be great..."

Chas watched them leave...as Paddy was placing his and Rhona's empty glasses onto the bar in front of her, " everything all right Chas..."

Chas instantly cracked a smile, " yeah I'm fine Paddy...w-where's Aaron..."

Paddy shrugged, " well THAT'S the big question...HE just called and says he's still at college...but he's ment to of met me and Rhona to go over the arrangements for Leo's christening...Rhona's abit miffed about it now"

Chas pulled a face, " so if he's not at College, where do you think he is..."

"out with Callum is MY guess...I mean, IT IS friday night...he're just be letting his hair down..."

Paddy went to go, but then stopped, " Bob was worried about somemit just now...is there anything wrong..."

This question took Chas by surprize, as she now served Katie, " nothing..." she said quickly, "there's nowt wrong at all..."

Chas felt bad...but if she had mentioned to him about Hazel, and some crisis with Jackson, Paddy would tell Aaron...that was ALL he needed, to be tied up with THAT LOT again...he had just started to get his life back into some sort of order, going back to college, getting himself a nice new fella...chuffed at being asked to be baby Leo's godfather...no, she decided to remain quiet about it...besides if she hadn't over heard what Bob had said, she'd be none the wiser anyway...

...so no harm done...was there...

Xxx

ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT, ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT, ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT...

Aaron rolled his eyes...the tune was doing his head in, as he stood holding his drink at Bar West.

It was Dean's birthday bash...

whoever Dean was, Aaron had never met the lad, but he supposed he wasn't the only one to of not of met him

Aaron turned back to the busy bar to get himself another beer, Callum was then beside him, suddenly appearing through a crowd of dancing lads, " hey...ARE you alright, sorry I keep leaving yah on your own..."

Aaron shrugged, "it's all right...I didn't know you had SO many mates...", Callum took a swig from his bottle, and smiled at him, " yeah, I do know alot of people, and they like you...well the LOOK of you anyway..."

Aaron was surprized by this, he pulled a face, " what!...YOUR mates like me"

Callum shook his head, and laughed out loud...he was pleased Aaron was chuffed that his mates took to him...well the ones he had introduced to him.

Aaron laughed too...Jackson's mates had all hated him...it made a change to be liked for a change...because he wasn't a bad lad deep down.

When Callum's attention was taken elsewhere AGAIN, Aaron found himself alone at the bar, his eyes crossed to the dance floor...and then toward the pooltable.

He lowered his eyes, and smiled too himself remembering back.

Suddenly a hand slapped onto his shoulder, " I THOUGHT IT WERE YOU!" said a voice.

Aaron turned his head...he couldn't put a name to the bloke, but HE HAD seen him before, the bloke obviously could see Aaron couldn't place a name to him, so he held out his hand,

"It's Phil, a mate of Jackson's..."

Aaron looked at Phil's outstretched hand, and ignored it...HE remembered him now...he was at that house warming he went to a few months ago, the one who had said he had given up on Jackson.

Phil smiled, " friendly AS EVER I see..." he muttered with sarcasm.

Aaron shrugged, and refused to look at him, " yep, so if you don't mind, do one!"

Phil glared at him, " UNBELIEVABLE...you are NOT even gonna ask about him, are you"

Aaron closed his eyes, he wanted to...but taking in a few breaths, he turned, " why would I...we are OVER...have been for months...WE ARE BOTH getting ON with our lives..."

Phil's sarcasm was cutting, as he glanced over to a reappearing Callum, " so I see..."

This got Aaron's goat up, " WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!"

Phil held up his hands to him, " hey back off...I'm only saying, YOU are getting on with your life, and so you should...it must be better than being tied down to a cripple..."

Aaron saw red, he wanted to rip his neck off...luckily from the distance away, Callum had sensed that there was some hostilites between the pair, he could SEE the anger in Aaron's killer glare.

"look, i'll tell you anyway how he's getting on, he's doing just great...he's even started to get out and about again, he told me that at his house warming..." then he saw the hurt in Aaron's face...in a flash of an instant it went from angry to hurt.

"oh yeah, " said Phil realising this was getting to him, " YOU weren't there were you...", Callum was now at Aaron's side, and looking suspiciously at Phil, " what's going on..."

Phil went to move away, " we're just having a catch up...weren't we Aaron"

Aaron turned and bolted towards the exit stair's...jumping two at a time to get out of the place.

Callum felt like wiping that amused look from Phil's face, so he ignored him, and went in pursuit of his boyfriend.

Xxx

Outside Bar West, Aaron was leaning on the wall further up the street, he pulled his leather jacket around himself because it was cold, Callum was then upon him, " Hey...don't take no notice of THAT jerk...HE doesn't know the whole story..."

Aaron snapped his head up, and bored into Callum's eyes, " WHAT...AND YOU DO!"

Callum swallowed, before he spoke, he knew when it came to Jackson, he ALWAYS had to tread carefully, "...well...only of WHAT you've told me" he said trying to be tactful.

Aaron shook his head, " yeah, that's right...NO ONE knows what WE went through...", Callum bit his bottom lip, and watched Aaron start to walk up the street, he followed him towards the taxi rank, " hey...aren't you not going to be stopping over with me tonight..."

Aaron turned around, his hands were in his jacket pockets, " nah...I've got to make it up with Paddy and Rhona remember...I SHOULD have been round there tonight, not here!"

Callum was feeling bad about that...Aaron had been chuffed when he had been asked to be Leo's godfather, and now HE could have put that in jeopardy in favour of enticing him to go to a party at Bar West instead...

"Look...blame me...tell them it's ALL my fault...you are gonna make a smashing Godfather..." told Callum genienely.

Aaron smiled at him, " yeah...I will be...Leo's gonna be lucky to have me!"

Callum didn't want to leave it there...he knew Aaron was still feeling rubbish about stuff, and he wasn't going to ask this tonight...but he did...

" Aaron...there's been something I've been thinking about..." he began, taking a step forward.

Aaron pulled him a face, looking around to see how many Taxis were in the rank, "what..."

Callum was nervous as hell, " I were wondering...I were HOPING you would say YES to something..."

Callum was being too cryptic for Aaron's liking, "yes to what..."

"yes to Marrying me!" cried Callum quickly, and in pure jest.

Aaron stared at him awkwardly, Callum could see that joke was going down like a sack of spuds, so he rolled his eyes at him, " I'M MESSING WITH YAH...don't look so worried..."

"then WHY say it" asked Aaron coldly, he then turned, " I've had enough of this,you're DOING me head in...", Callum jumped forward and stopped him, " Aaron wait!...loosen up will yah...I were just gonna ask you..." he swallowed, " ...to move in with me"

Aaron stopped in his tracks...his eyes glancing up at anything, but Callum, the words 'moving in' going round and round in his brain, Callum could see Aaron was mulling over it...less it wasn't a point blank no!

Aaron looked to the sky, shaking his head " why...why now...why do this to me now..."

"Durrrrr...because I want you to move in with me...I wouldn't have asked you otherwise"

Aaron closed his eyes... to him...this was all too soon...why now, they were just fine how they were, weren't they... why go and change things between them now.

"I'm not sure about that...I'm not sure whether i'm ready for that..." he finally answered truthily...

Callum was gutted...he sighed out...it was something he was thinking about all day...and this was the LAST reaction he was expecting.

Their relationship was going great...especially since Aaron had been putting the past behind him, and having a laugh with him...but Callum wanted more now...he wanted...HOPED even, that Aaron would have felt the same way.

Callum could see how differcult this was for Aaron...he was being tactless and unfair...he placed a hand up to Aaron's elbow, but he shook him off, " Aaron...I know what I'm asking of you is a BIG THING...and this is a bit of a shock...but, you see...I'm only saying it because...

Aaron was starting to pick up a vibe from Callum, and it made his heart race at the very thought of it...he looked up at him with an unsure gaze, " don't say it..." he muttered.

"say what..." asked Callum, " I want to tell you how much I...", Callum shook his head,deciding on a different approach " I've fallen for you BIG TIME Aaron..."

Aaron leaned on the railings that led up to the taxi rank, " and I WANT TO feel the same...fall for yah...but there's nothing...I keep thinking that maybe one day..."

Callum stepped forward, " look...it's TOO SOON...it's my fault, just forget I mentioned it, alright"

Aaron looked up at him...Callum looked SO SAD...SO DISAPPOINTED about his reaction to his feelings for him.

So he smiled, " just...you just need to wait for me...im not saying no to moving in with yah...it's just, I really need to get me head round it all, i'll need some time..."

Callum came forward and kissed him on the forehead, " I will ALWAYS wait for you...take as long as you need to"

Aaron pulled away from him, " so...we are alright then...AS we are...keeping it simple"

Callum nodded his head...his smile hiding how gutted he was, " of course...when EVER you are ready, just let me know..."

They kissed one more time,and lingered in a hug, a group of girls giggled at them, and after Aaron giving them a right glare, they went their separate ways for the night...Aaron saying he'd see him in the morning when he would pick up his moped.

Aaron waited for a cab to be free...he shivered...it was so cold tonight...

And he feared Callum would think he had a cold heart...it wasn't cold...it was hot and it was burning...

...burning for a love for someone else... that could ever never be...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...The end of this story is not set in stone...so you might get what you've hoped for...although whether that's Aaron being with Jackson or Callum, you're still have to wait and see...!

Here's the latest chapter...PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! xx

Aaron Livesy twisted and turned in the bed... he was restless...sleep just wasn't coming to him any time soon.

The room was dark...but for the glow of the streetlight outside, as he opened his eyes and faced the shadows of the ceiling, he felt movement and the lamp suddenly snapped on, the brightness was instantly hurting his eyes.

"what are you playing at..." Aaron hissed, shielding his eyes, Callum turned and faced him, "what's up with yah...everytime I think i'm about to drop off, you move and wake me up again..." cried Callum, " I have to be up and at the farm in 3 hours..."

Aaron sighed out loud, " I'm sorry mate, i just can't sleep..."

Callum sat up, and looked down at him, " what is it...it's still not the other day is it...when I said about you moving in here...I TOTALLY understand you are not ready for that...i'm okay about it..." he reasured.

Aaron wished it WAS that what was bugging him, and keeping him wide awake.

But it was something else...that evening his mother had let something slip...she had said that she had heard about some crisis with Hazel...and ANY crisis with hazel ment it was something to do with Jackson.

Chas had tried to back track, but he had forced it out of her...she had told him she had overheard it from Bob.

After interroragting Bob about it, he admitted that it was Jackson, and that Jackson had been rushed to hospital again a few days ago with yet more respiratory problems.

A few days ago!

He hadn't been best pleased to hear that this had happened days ago, and NO ONE had bothered telling him...didn't they know how important Jackson was to him.

USED TO BE to him...

Aaron turned his head to Callum, from where he laid, " I'm sorry mate, it's nothing...I just having a restless night, that's all...it's nothing to do with about...the othernight, I promise"

Callum brushed Aaron's cheek with his fingers, " I hope not...you are...important to me..."

Aaron swallowed, he wished Callum wouldn't admit his feelings for him, so he rolled over, "turn the light out yeah", he simply told, wanting end to this conversation, what was it about keeping it simple, did Callum not understand.

Callum shrugged, and upon switching the lamp off, the bedroom was in darkness again...the silence only interrupted by a passing car outside.

And then finally, Aaron closed his eyes...

Xxx

At breakfast Callum was getting ready to go, Aaron was at the table with his cereal, "right, i'm off...I'll text you later...you still want to do this bowling tonight, James and Dave said they'd meet us there..."

Aaron only nodded as he stared toward his phone, Callum leaned in and kissed Aaron on the lips, " see yah...and don't worry about fat Fiona upstairs, she's never rolls out of bed till past ten..."

Aaron pulled a face, " I'll be long gone by then...see you later..."

Once Callum had gone, Aaron picked up his phone, and scrolled down through the numbers...until he came to Hazel's number...he bit his lip in thought...and bottled it...he had another idea...

XXx

Aaron slowly strolled up the hospital corridor, he had asked the ward clerk where he could find Jackson Walsh, and she had told him it was room 8, at the respiratory unit.

As he came up up to the door...he could see Jackson lying in the bed, he wasn't facing him, he was typically facing the TV in the corner, Aaron smiled to himself...it was SO GOOD to see him...and it was SO GOOD to see him so well.

He felt the butterflies flutter about in his stomach, he was nervous...he was nervous about seeing him...talking to him, and as he leant upon the wall debating to go in or not, his mind was going blank...he didn't know what to say to him!...how awkward would it be...for BOTH of them, if he went in their and they were both rendered speechless.

He looked back up the corridor, maybe it was just best to go...Jackson wouldn't be none the wiser anyway.

He was just about to, when he heard him talking to someone...there was someone in there with him...and it wasn't Hazel or his carer Joe.

The voice sounded familar...a woman, and then she came into view, as she was propping up Jackson's pillows behind his head...it were that daft nurse...Nurse Summers.

Jackson's face was a picture...he was obviously not best pleased with her faffing around him, and blocking his view to the TV.

Aaron smirked to himself...maybe it would be okay to go in there with HER present...as daft as she was...less she was there to curb the awkward silence's...and there was BOUND to a fair few.

Aaron took in a deep breath and rounded the door way...his hands dug deep into his hoodie pockets...he slowly walked into view...Jackson's attention was still toward the TV, but Nurse Summers looked up and beamed him a welcoming smile, " hello there!...long time no see!"

Jackson pulled a face at her, "shhhhhush will yah, I'm trying to watch thisssss..." he was staring right at Aaron...mouth agape, not totally convinced that he was actually seeing him, "...A-Aaron..." he stuttered out quietly.

Aaron could see Jackson was shocked to see him...it had been over two months since they had last seen eachother...that last day back in the summer in the village, at the taxi...a day Aaron had thought alot about, when he was having one of those nights you found it hard to sleep, like last night.

Aaron smiled at him, " I were sorta passing...I thought I'd look in on yah" he blurted, it also sounded unlikely.

Jackson nodded, " who...", he swallowed, "...who told YOU I was in here...", Aaron stepped forward, and looked down at him, " me Mum...she overheard Bob talking to Brenda in the pub...about a crisis with yah..."

Jackson raised his eyebrowes, and snapped his neck back round to face the TV, " what crisis...I'm fine me!"

Aaron bit his lip, " but you weren't..."

Jackson looked up at him frowning, " no I wasn't before OBVIOUSLY...I had one of me funny turns...where I'm drowning in me own snot, like before...but I'm okay now..."

Aaron remembered before...that May night outside the comedy club, when Jackson's lungs needed to be cleared out, because he couldn't clean them out himself...

Jackson was staring at him, " so...errrrr...how are you doing...you still with whatshisface, are yah",

Aaron smirked as he looked to the ceiling, Jackson was doing THAT on purpose, " his names Callum..."

Jackson nodded at him, " that'll be it...still with him, are yah"

Aaron shook his head as he grabbed a chair, " yep, I'm still with him...", Jackson watched him sit down, and pulled his eyebrowes together, "make yahself comfortable why don't yah..." he shot at him with sarcasm.

Aaron sat and looked at him, "I am thanks...so what about you...how...how are you doing...", Jackson shook his head in disbelief, and nooded his chin toward his body, " STILL can't move, but apart from that..."

Nurse Summers came over, "right, I'm going off on my break..."

Jackson pulled her a face, " and you are telling ME because..."

She smiled at Aaron, " he's been like this all morning...see if you can cheer him up...", she then walked out the room, Jackson watched her, then turned his attention back to Aaron, looking at him as if to say, 'and how are you gonna be doing that'

Aaron glanced at him briefly, before focusing on the rest of the room...the awkward silence...he knew it would rear it's ugly head...he shouldn't have come...he was about to stand up, when Jackson suddenly put an end to the silence, " i'm sorry if i'm being mardy with yah...it's just HER...she winds me up..."

Aaron smiled at him, he relaxed abit, " she always did...", he turned to face him...there eyes meeting for the first time, " so...hows the new place, you and Hazel settled in, have yah..."

Jackson nodded his head, " yeah, it's sound...it's GOT everything we need in it...AND it's much bigger than Dale Head..." he breathed out a small laugh, " I've ACTUALLY got me OWN room, with a door and everything..."

Aaron laughed with him, " that's good...less you can shut yah mother out when she starts getting on your nerves, hey"

Jackson was smiling...Aaron LOVED his smile...he had missed seeing it...

"your mate, Phil...I bumped in to him the other night at bar West, he said you doing great...and it sounds like it..."

Jackson shook his head, turning his head to face the wall, " I get out and about more...on me own like...instead of me mother in toe ALL the time..."

Aaron shrugged, "that's good...must be a pain having HER around you all the time, like before"

Jackson laughed, he turned and faced Aaron, " I've sorta been doing things online as well...courses like...you know, to ease the boredom"

Aaron was impressed, Jackson had never bothered with that before...he just had showed no interest before...

Before he only had wanted one thing...to die...

It must have shown up on Aaron's expression, because Jackson's next words made him look up to stare right at him again, " I'm sorry Aaron...about before...about making you..."

Aaron swallowed down, and waved out his hand dismissively, " it don't matter..."

"IT DOES!...we never spoke about it...and we should...we've gotta clear the air..." told Jackson seriously, " because I STILL THINK ABOUT IT..."

Aaron looked up, his eyes widening in horror, and Jackson was quick to spot it, "NO...NOT...NOT THAT...not dying...I keep thinking about WHAT I PUT YOU THROUGH...it were cruel of me...I used your feelings...to my own advantage"

Aaron had heard that before...from Paddy...but he didn't believe it before...but Jackson was now admitting to it...

Aaron shook his head at him, staring into Jackson's gaze " I would have done it...I would have done it you know..."

Jackson shook his own head, " I don't doubt that...", and he loved Aaron all the more for it.

Aaron put his hand onto Jackson's arm...Jackson's eyes looked down to look, then was looking up again at him, " I'm SO SO sorry Aaron...I loved you MORE than anything...and I used you..."

Aaron shook his head, " I don't believe that...YOU were just desparate, not thinking straight...you would NEVER use me..."

Aaron realised his hand was STILL on Jackson's arm, so he snapped it away, " sorry...I wasn't thinking..."

Jackson found it amusing, lightening the tone, " so does whatshisface not like you going touching up other blokes then"

Aaron screwed his face up at him," I NOT touching you up...I just didn't think...AND his names Callum..."

Jackson pursed his lips, " whatever..." he returned flippantly.

Aaron rolled his tongue up onto his top lip, " so...WHAT about you then...are you seeing anyone...", not that Aaron wanted Jackson to know if he was bothered if he was...

Jackson shrugged the question off, as he turned his head back to the TV, "there might of been..."

Aaron was intrigued, " errrrr...who...", Jackson turned back to him, " who what..."

Aaron rolled his eyes, " WHO were you seeing..."

Jackson was being sheepish, " no one...just...just someone I met up on the net..." he replied trailing off as he did so.

Aaron laughed as it dawned on him, " YOU'VE BEEN INTERNET DATING!"

Jackson snapped his head round with a glare, " ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT!... go broadcasting it, why don't yah!", Aaron ignored him, he was dying to know the outcome, "and..."

" lets just say I met up with a bloke who makes YOU look like Einstein!"

Aaron frowned at him, " What's THAT supposed to mean!", Jackson smiled, " we arranged to meet...as you do...he came round to mine...and...and left...", Aaron was puzzled by that, he leaned forward, " left..." he asked curiously, " ...why did he go...let me guess...he didn't like that cheap aftershave you wear!"

Jackson shook his head, " no it weren't THAT actually...he just wasn't expecting to met a bloke in a wheelchair..." Jackson could see Aaron was lost, " HE thought being Tetraplegic was MY occupation...it were quite a shock for him"

Aaron screwed up his face, " oh stuff him..."

"I wish...HE was quite fit come to think of it!" mused Jackson...also he knew that would get to Aaron.

But it was wasted on him, Aaron was glancing at his watch, and then jumped up out of the seat, " oh well...I've gotta be somewhere...better be off..."

Jackson tried to hide his disappointment, he turned away, " suppose you've got a bus to catching or something"

Aaron nodded as he leaned in foward abit, " Nah...no more buses for me mate, these days I rely on me motorbike..."

Jackson blew out a laugh and looked up at him, " oh yeah!, got all the leathers to go with it have yah!"

Aaron tried to shrug the white lie off, " well...it's more of a moped actually..."

Jackson laughed out loud...Aaron rolled his eyes, Jackson was finding the image of him on a moped highly amusing...but it was good to see Jackson laugh...and it made him smile too...

"So then..." started Aaron, digging his hands further into his hoodie, " you want me to come and visit you again, do yah"

Jackson sniffed, and with a shot of a glance replied, " you can do...not fussed really, I get plenty of visitors me..."

Aaron was a bit miffed by that response, so he turned on his heel, " alright...be like that...see you around...", Nurse Summers had just come back to witness the conversation between the boys, Jackson snapped his head round to see Aaron heading towards the door, his eyes giving away that he regretted saying that, " Aaron wait..." he called out.

Aaron turned with a sigh, " what..."

Jackson looked right at him, " ...I mean...yeah...I would like you to come and visit me again..."

Aaron placed his hands loosely on his hips, and smirked back at him, " alright then, I better see what I can do, a..."

Jackson managed a smile for him, and as Aaron went to turn away again, Jackson called out again, " Aaron..."

Aaron turned around, "what now..."

Jackson glanced his eyes away from him, to view the TV as he said the words, " just be careful on that Moped yeah...don't be taking those corners too sharp..."

Aaron raised his eyebrowes at him, then walked off without another word.

Jackson grinned to himself, as he focused his attention back to the TV, but he couldn't help noticing nurse Summers' smile.

"What..." he asked, pulling a frown at her.

The nurse mimicked him, " I mean...yeah, I would like you to come visit me again..." she teased.

Jackson shook his head, and faced the TV, " shut up!", but he still held his smile...

Xxx

Aaron walked up the corridor toward the exit, HE couldn't help but to smile...it really was good to see Jackson...he was STILL a div as ever...but it was a good feeling...

Jackson wanted him to visit him again...

Aaron smiled, he couldn't wait...it was like they had made a date...it FELT like they had made a date.

And it was that thought that took the smile from his face, he thought about Callum, WHAT on earth was he playing at...being here...

He had no business being here...

Aaron marched out into the cold October air, he was fumbling around in his pocket for his cigs, he needed one...this was a big mistake coming here today...

Callum was proberly at the bowling alley waiting for him...waiting for them to have a great night out with friends, Aaron couldn't do this to him...he had to focus on the future NOT the past...he turned his head to face the hospital, and as he exhaled his smoke, he had already made the decision that he won't be coming back...

It was a mistake he wasn't gonna go repeating over again...

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	18. Chapter 18

CHAPTER 18/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...The end of this story is not set in stone...so you might get what you've hoped for...although whether that's Aaron being with Jackson or Callum, you're still have to wait and see...!

Here's the latest chapter...PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! xx

Aaron sat in the back room of the Woolpack eating his lunch, and was switching from one TV channel to the next.

It was his lunch hour, and Cain had been working him like a dog all morning...to make up for all the fridays he is 'wasting his time at college'

Just as he was about to stuff his face with another mouthful of sandwich, the door opened and Hazel came bolting in.

Aaron nearly choked when he clapped eyes on her, he stood up, " WHAT the hell are YOU doing here!"

Hazel was now standing in the middle of the back room, clutching hold of her shoulder strap of her handbag...she was pointing her finger at him, and she didn't look best pleased, " never mind about that!...I understand you went to visit my boy in the hospital the other day..."

Aaron shook his head pulling a face, " yeah so!...THAT'S YOUR business because..."

Hazel stepped forward, " so WHY did you tell him you'd go visit him again...WHY Aaron..."

Aaron swallowed, he felt bad about that...course he did...he pulled another face, " I...I changed me mind...I CAN DO that...I don't need HIS permission you know!"

Hazel could see Aaron wasn't 'getting it', she can down hard on him, " DO YOU KNOW HOW GUTTED HE WAS...WHEN YOU NEVER SHOWED UP AGAIN!", there was even a tear in her eye.

Aaron instantly faced the floor in shame...he didn't think Jackson would be THAT gutted...it wasn't as if he was interested in him anymore, seeing since he was now internet dating.

"I'm sorry...but I HEARD he was ill...I went to see him...HE'S OKAY...end of..." he said summoning it all up.

Hazel stared at him, " so WHY say it to him...that you're visit again...WHY Aaron...WHY get his hopes up"

Aaron rubbed his hand over his shaven head, " I don't know...I just thought maybe..." he sighed out heavily, " I don't know...I DON'T!" he answered, trying to convince her that he DIDN'T know...

He stood there looking at her...she had lost a hell of a lot of weight...it was certainly not BIG Hazel anymore...she looked ill...it was the result of a years worry over Jackson...and he had caused it all.

Hazel made for the door waving her hand, " Ohhhhhh, what's the use...you NEVER did listen to a word I said...or HIM for that matter..."

Aaron looked up, and grabbed her arm, before she could open the door, " WHAT do you mean by that!"

" I SAID I was sorry...HE said he was sorry...and you...you never listened..." she told sadly.

Aaron shook his head, " I listened to him at the hospital...he said he was sorry and I said it were okay...end of...we're cool...we can...get on with our lives..."

"HE makes you happy, does he...this Callum boy" Aaron was taken aback by Hazel's direct question, he stammered slightly, forcing out his answer, " yeah...he's alright is Callum..."

Hazel sadly smiled, " just alright...", she then was out the door, leaving Aaron to slowly sit back down on the couch...she said that Jackson had been gutted that he had never came back to visit him...could that mean...he smiled to himself...he felt the same...but was it right...just because they MAY still love eachother, was it right for them to get back together...

Them together...hurts too many people...

Xxx

Hazel hurried up to the waiting taxi, as Aaron came out of the pub behind her, " Hazel!...wait up will yah!"

Hazel turned, and watched as Aaron came jogging over to her, his blue greasy overalls hanging around his waist and tied in a knot.

"Did...did you mean what you said...was Jackson really gutted that I never went back...", Hazel rolled her eyes at him, " COURSE I DID, I wouldn't have said it otherwise..."

Aaron bit his tongue...he wanted to smile, but something inside him, held him back.

"Look Aaron, I've gotta go...", she was about to climb into the taxi, when Aaron stopped her, it was reaction, his reflex was quicker than his thinking...

"but why...WHY would he be gutted...he's moved on...HE even said he was internet dating"

Hazel shook her head at him, " yeah he is...but he's only DOING THAT to wind Joe up...he THINKS he can get more hits than him...you KNOW how much he loves winding him up..."

Hazel could see that Aaron had MORE of an interest than he was letting on...she was careful not to push him, " come...come and visit him at home if you like...he'd love to see you..."

No...that was a red rag to a bull!

Aaron pulled her a face, " WHAT!...ME go visit him...It's ALWAYS ME!...Jackson gets ill, and I go and drop everything to GO VISIT HIM!..."

Hazel shrugged, " yes but, you know what he's like...he's"

Aaron butted in, " before...before the accident...he once said to me that HE wasn't getting anything out of the relationship, he was doing all the giving, but getting nowt in return...because I was always thinking of meself...and MAYBE I was...maybe I was selfish...but do you know what...I NOW KNOW HOW that feels...getting NOWT in return" Hazel could feel the deep emotion from him.

After a few moments, He turned on his heel to head back to the pub, Hazel dithered at the taxi, one leg in, one leg out, and the driver was getting abit narked, " are you gonna be much longer love!" he cried.

Hazel ignored him, and called after Aaron, " But he'd loved to see you..."

"HE KNOWS where I am..." Aaron shot back, was was back in the pub in an instant.

Hazel shook her head to herself, and finally got into the cab and slammed the door shut, upon facing the driver it was SHE who was now narked, " well come on them, I haven't got all day..."

Xxx

Hazel let herself into the bungolow, and closed the door behind her.

"where have you been all morning!" asked Jackson, as he glided up to her in the chair, Hazel turned, there was nothing like being 'caught on the hop'

"ohhhh just down the town love, YOU know me..."

Jackson glanced up and down at her suspiciously, " really...so WHY have you got THAT LOOK about yah"

Hazel removed her jacket, " look...what look"

"the look you have when you are lying..." told Jackson, "...THAT idiot Joe forgot to charge the battery up to me laptop, I've haven't been able to do anything with me online course...i've sat looking at meself all morning"

Hazel became all apologetic, " ohhhh I'm sorry my little darling...let me go and sort it out now for you..."

Jackson turned in his chair, "oh don't be bothering with that now...I flaming gasping for a brew me, can you go make me one please..."

Hazel smiled at him, and headed into the kitchen...she wanted to tell him that she had been to see Aaron.

But knowing Jackson, he would get mad...say she is interfering...and maybe she was...

She filled up the kettle and plugged the lead in, Aaron WAS interested, she could swear that she saw it in him...in his face.

But...the boy had someone else...so what did any of it matter...

"DO YOU WANT SOME SOUP JACKSON..." she called, faffing about with a saucepan and can of tomato soup.

"that'll be nice...NOT tomato again though, you know I can't stick it" came Jackson's reply.

She decided to let Aaron slip from mind, and embarked on making Jackson some late lunch.

"tough...that's all what we've got..." she muttered, pouring the soup into the pan.

Xxx

That evening, Aaron Livesy sat in a quiet corner of the Woolpack.

Adam came over from the bar with two pints in each hand, " there you go mate...", Aaron took his and took a sip, " cheers mate..."

Adam looked up to him, as he sat " so...you not going out with Callum tonight...bit unlike you, thought you and him were a sure thing"

Aaron pulled him a face, "WHAT makes you think that...it's nowt serious, me and him",he winsed as he said it, WHY did he just say THAT!

Adam was abit confused, " but I thought you and him looked pretty close...I mean don't you and him..." he trailed off, letting Aaron come to the conclusion of what he was trying to say.

"WHAT'S IT TO YOU!..." Aaron told...he was abit narked with Adam now, why did HE think Callum was so special.

Adam was all on the defensive, " I'm only just saying mate...I JUST THOUGHT...you and him were going steady like..."

Aaron shook his head, " HE may think so...", he glanced to the ceiling, and Adam could see how conflicted the lad was, " I really don't know WHAT to think of him...not since I went to see...", he broke off.

Adam knew there was something Aaron wanted to say, " see who...", Aaron appeared to be in a trance, "...AARON!"

Aaron justed stared at him...the 'not saying a word' let Adam come to his own conclusion again, " have you seen Jackson...have you seen Jackson...!"

Aaron nodded his head, and supped more of his pint, Adam was quite surprized by this, "but, you never said...WHEN did this happen..."

Aaron sighed, " he's been ill again...but he's alright now...I heard he was ill from mum...she overheard Bob talking..."

"so how do you feel about seeing him...WHAT did HE say when he saw you..."

Aaraon was about to reply, when his phone went off, he picked it up to see the display flash up, **CALLUM CALLING...**

Aaron licked his lips, and placed the phone down next to his pint...it soon went on to voicemail.

"you not gonna answer that..." asked Adam, Aaron nodded, "nah...it'll keep...I'll get us another pint in, shall I"

Xxx

Callum stared at his mobile display where he stood up at the bar.

He was in Bar West, and although he had no plans to meet up with Aaron that night, he still wanted to hear his voice, because he missed him...even if it was just the voicemail he got.

His mate Rowan was then back from a visit to the gents, " so...did you get hold of him then..."

Callum nodded his head, as he pocketed the mobile, " Nah...it went to voicemail...he must be busy"

Rowan pulled a face, " what...too busy to even chat to his boyfriend...what does he do when he's not with you...oh, oh yeah, SIT IN HIS ROOM...that's what you told me..."

Callum didn't like Rowan's tone of voice, " hey leave him alone...he's been through a lot has Aaron..."

Rowan leant his elbow on the bar, " yeah...YOU keep saying...what IS the big deal about his Ex anyway...I know he was crippled or something"

Callum shook his head, " yeah he was...but..." he sighed, he didn't want to admit to this, let alone say it out loud, " I think Aaron STILL loves him..."

Rowan laughed out in disbelief, " WHAT!...WHAT THE HELL FOR!...WHAT can HE have with him, that he CAN'T have from you..."

Callum felt bad, "don't..."

"NO!...YOU can give him SO MUCH MORE...you just have to convince him off that...his Ex can give him NOWT!...I know it's abit cruel to say...but it's true...HE can give Aaron anything...you can give him so much more...so just keep working on him..." he smiled with a wink.

Callum nodded, it was abit cruel...but Rowan was so right, Jackson could do nothing for Aaron...but he could...

He could take Aaron out...Jackson couldn't..

He could give Aaron a good time...Jackson couldn't

He could make Aaron happy...Jackson couldn't

He could please Aaron with hot sex in the bedroom...Jackson couldn't.

Callum relaxed abit...he felt calmer now...less worried...he knew Aaron had been through hell in the past...whatever it was...Aaron would ALWAYS keep that himself...but he was determined to make Aaron realise that HE was the one for him...and not Jackson...

and he smiled...he really needed to show JUST HOW MUCH had fallen for him...

Xxx

Aaron climbed the stairs to his bedroom at the Woolpack, it had just turned 11 and he felt tired.

He slumped onto his bed, and laid there staring to the ceiling, he had felt alittle bad about ignoring Callum's call earlier that evening, but he couldn't face talking to him...

He STILL hadn't told Callum that he had went to visit Jackson in the hospital.

And Callum would get upset about it...he was okay in the beginning...when Jackson was STILL in the village, but now...now Jackson was out of sight...Callum couldn't see what was going on...keep an eye on him.

He turned his head to face the photo on his side unit...WHY did he have Jackson's picture sat there...WHY hadn't he long exchanged it, with one of him and Callum together...

He sighed heavily...deep down he KNEW the reason...he just didn't want to succumb to it.

Hazel came to mind...and it STILL made him smile to think that AFTER ALL THIS TIME APART...Jackson was GUTTED when he didn't go back to see him, at the hospital.

Jackson gutted...did Jackson still care for him.

Did Jackson still love him...like he loved him before...the ONLY one to love him for him.

He banished the smile from his own face...WHAT was the point of thinking about all that...

Jackson had become selfish...he had ADMITTED to it at the hospital...he had USED HIM to get what he wanted...to get him to go through with the suicide.

Jackson loved him once...would have done ANYTHING for him...

He would be the first to come by and take him out...but not now...that would NEVER happen now...

Jackson Walsh was history...

and Callum James was his present...whether he liked it all not, he should just focus on that now...

Xxx

Hazel laughed out loud in the armchair.

The lounge was dim lit, the standard lamp putting a soft glow to upon her face, she turned to see Jackson come through the doorway, in his chair.

"so...you finished on your laptop then..." Hazel asked, turning her head from the telly screen.

Jackson nodded as he looked up, " yeah...I gotta bit bored with it to be honest...what's this...", his eyes were now focusing on the TV.

Hazel laughed, and pointed, " just one of the old comedies...you remember, WE all used to watch them when you were small...you, me and yah dad..."

Jackson shook his head, " owt else on..."

Hazel didn't hear him, " ...oh speaking of your father, don't forget he's coming over tomorrow..."

Jackson wasn't impressed, " ohhhhh, he isn't is he...WHAT for...I could do with not having HIM around me..." he whined.

Hazel stood up, " he's gonna be putting those shelves up...the ones that have been WAITING to be put up since we moved in..."

Jackson still wasn't impressed, " well...I'll be getting Joe to take me out then..."

Hazel turned, as she headed to the kitchen to make a brew, " NO Jackson...you haven't seen him for a couple of weeks...BE FAIR to him please"

Jackson screwed up his face, as he followed her, " like I HAVE ANY choice..."

Hazel prepared the mugs, and turned, " just BE nice to him...that's ALL I ask..."

Jackson was reluctant, but he looked away shaking his head...his brown eyes settling on a picture of Aaron on the mantel in the dining room.

Hazel could see the faraway gaze...

She swallowed...whether it was the right thing to do or not...it was going to be too late now.

"I saw him today..."

Jackson slowly turned his gaze to her, " who...me dad"

Hazel shook her head, and came forward, sticking her hands into her cardie pockets.

"no, Aaron...I went to see him in the village..."

Jackson stared at her...he was struckdumb for a few minutes...before he turned his chair, to face her,eyebrowes knotted together " WHAT...WHY...MUM WHY!", he was NOT happy.

Hazel became all defensive to him, " I was concerned for you...you were all excited about the thought of seeing him again...and then he never showed up..."

Jackson looked at her in sheer disbelief, " and what...YOU go see him!...MUM I don't give a toss whether he came back or not..."

"YOU WERE upset, I could see it in your eyes...", insisted Hazel.

Jackson breathed out a laugh, " what...no you never...I'M GETTING ON WITH ME LIFE...he was the sad one...HE was the one who came to see me...I rather he not bothered to be honest..."

Hazel turned her back on him, she was so frustrated with him, " so you are okay with HIM and THAT BOY then..."

Jackson's focused on the floor, " it's HIS life...he can do what he wants...", Hazel swung around from the sink, " AND WHAT about YOU!...what do you want..."

Jackson was close to tears, but he wasn't going to succumb, " what does it matter...we don't always get what we want...or who we want...sometimes we have to settle for second best..."

There was a pause...and Hazel stepped forward, " yes...and JUST MAYBE Aaron is doing JUST THAT...", she was now tearful, " ...just because you are IN THAT CHAIR SWEETHEART...it doesn't make YOU second best...does it..."

and she walked off, to leave him alone.

TBC...please tell me what you think...xx


	19. Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ...Hi, thanks for the reviews for the past chapters...So there is only one more chapter to go...

Here's the latest chapter...PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! xx

Callum James woke up with one guy on his mind...Aaron Livesy.

He lept out of bed...it was 5 in the morning, and he had to be on the farm early, but already he was thinking past the days hard work ahead of him.

He was going to be taking Aaron out tonight...somewhere special...

A couple of weeks ago, he had NEARLY scared Aaron off...maybe asking him to move in with him, was a step too fast.

Boy!, who could blame him, he proberly would have felt the same, and reacted in a similar way.

But did Aaron KNOW how much he thought about him...

How much he had fallen for him...how much he now loved him.

He HAD to tell him...and maybe, just maybe, Aaron would feel better about it all, he wouldn't feel so overwhelmed about moving in, if he knew HOW MUCH he loved him.

It was only a indian restraurant he had booked.

But it was that posh new one in town, tonight he was out to impress Aaron big time.

Nothing was too good for Aaron.

He went into the shower room, and turned the taps, he has a feeling that today was gonna be a happy day!

Xxx

Jackson laid on his bed...he also had one guy on his mind... Aaron Livesy.

For the last couple of days, Jackson had thought about him alot, well, alot more than he had been normally.

His mother had mentioned something about him not DOING any thing for Aaron...make him feel wanted or appreciated.

It was true...he had been quite selfish with Aaron, when he had been wallowing in self pity, when he just wanted to die...Aaron had finally admitted to him that he loved him, and shamefully, he took advantage of that...and finally had admitted so to him at the hospital when he came to visit.

BUT HE DID LOVE AARON, and he had decided it was about time to show him JUST HOW MUCH he loved him, and go to him for a change...

But...could he REALLY stand a chance against a fully able man...this Callum pratt could give HIS Aaron so much more couldn't he...it seemed futile actually, but he'd give it is best shot...

His carer, Joe came in with the clean flannels and towels, "...did I tell yah I've got that hot date tonight, she looks fit...her profile pic was abit suspect though,but..."

Jackson ignored him, and turned his head, " did you get me text..."

Joe frowned at him, " yeah I did...2 in the MORNING might I add..."

Jackson ignored him again, " did you get them..."

Joe nodded his head, " it weren't exactly open when I passed by earlier...but, I can pop round here with them later if you like..."

Jackson managed a small smile for him...he turned away...he with that faraway look about him, Joe tilted his head as he folded up the towels, " WHY do you want cinema tickets anyway...AND to go and see Zombie dawn!"

Jackson refused to answer him, he rolled his head, raising his eyebrowes, "can you go get me my breakfast now, please..."

Joe sighed and looked up, " I WILL get this outta you, you know...you can't keep secrets from me..."

Jackson narrowed his eyes at him, as Joe went to go to the kitchen, " wanna bet...because I'm DOING JUST that!"

Xxx

Aaron Livesy was in a trance.

He was at the garage...at a motor...it's bonnet was up...and he had a spanner poised...

But that was it...

Cain had noticed this from where he was sitting, on the phone to a client...he tried to get his attention, but Aaron was 'too faraway'!

Once he had ended the call, Cain thought about chucking something at him...but he thought the direct approach was ALWAYS better when it came to Aaron's daydreaming...and more satisfying.

He crept up to him, and leaned in to his ear, " WAKEY WAKEY!..ARE YOU GONNA BE DOING ANY GRAFT TODAY OR WHAT!"

Aaron jumped out of his trance, and went straight back to it with a scowl.

Cain grinned at him, " WHERE do you go...in these trances of yours...", Aaron looked up, he didn't like talking about these things with his Uncle, " mind your own!..."

Cain raised his eyebrowes, and nodded to the car Aaron was working on, " Mr Brown is coming for that in a hour..now, I'm telling yah, MAKE SURE it's done and finished with before he gets here, alright...because any refund will be coming out of YOUR wages!"

Aaron pulled a face as Cain walked away...it was then his mobile jingled to life, he pulled it out from his greasy overalls, and looked whom it was

**Callum calling...**

He flipped the lid and answered, " yeah what...what...take me out...take me out where...YOU KNOW I HATE SURPRIZES ME!...I'll like this one, will I...well I better...8 yeah...BE at the pub for then...and DON'T be late..."

He smirked, Callum was STILL trying to make up with him.

For asking him to move in...Aaron JUST wanted it to be simple between the two of them...his smirk faded...he just hoped Callum wasn't gonna be TOO heavy and emotional with him later on...

Xxx

Hazel sat and fed Jackson his lunch in the dining room of their bungolow, "sorry it's tomato soup again love, it's just I haven't had chance to get to the shops..."

Jackson's reply surprized Hazel, she was already bracing herself with a knockback or a put down, " that's alright, even though I can't stick it, i'm eating it...even though it's stone cold..."

Hazel smiled, " I've just looked what's on the TV for tonight, there's a couple films you'll like..."

Jackson looked up at her, " errrr...no I'm busy tonight actually, Mum..."

Hazel pulled a face, "Jackson you've BEEN on that laptop ALL morning...can't you give it a rest, love..."

Jackson shook his head, " DO YOU MIND!...that's my on-line course you're dissing...AND it's gotta be completed by Friday...besides...it's NOT that...", he paused, readying himself for his big announcement, he pursed his lips, " I'm going out..."

Hazel looked up, she frowned at him, " GOING OUT...where...when did you decide this...", Jackson rolled his eyes at her, " DO I HAVE to inform you EVERYTIME I decide to go out!"

Before Hazel could reply, the front door was opening, and Joe let himself in, " ONLY ME!"

Jackson looked up towards the hallway, "WE'RE IN HERE MATE!..."

Joe came through the doorway with a big grin on his face, Jackson looked up at him...his eyebrowes raising, " So...did you get them..."

Joe nodded, and pulled out an envelope from inside pocket, " I did indeed..."

Jackson grinned, and watched Hazel stare at the envelope in Joe's grasp, " what's going on..."

Jackson rolled his eyes, as he nodded his head toward her, " ignore her!...can you stay and get me ready..."

Joe looked at his watch, " I think i've got just enough time, before my hot date...", Jackson laughed, as he glanced at his mother, " YOU and ME both mate...you and me both..."

Jackson was just about to glid out after Joe, when Hazel went and barred the way, " GOING OUT...HOT DATE...are you going to start explaining yourself..."

Jackson knotted his eyebrowes together, " MUM!...just leave it, will yah!...THAT'S WHY I never told you me plans!...you go and interfere ALLLL the time...now shift your arse, you heard him, Joes only got an hour to get THIS ready..." he was nodding his head toward his own body.

Hazel swallowed, and moved aside to let Jackson pass, she felt put out...Jackson hadn't TOLD HER his plans...she was ONLY looking out for him...

Jackson stopped half way up the hallway, and turned the chair around to face her, " Mum...I'll tell you what...pick out some nice clothes for me...NICE clothes mind...I don't wanna go out looking like a div, do I..."

Hazel put on her smile for him, but as he turned again and headed to the wet room where Joe was waiting for him, it faded.

He was letting her help him...but she STILL wanted to know what he was up to...

Xxx

Aaron closed up the garage for Cain, he pad locked the door, and turned to see the door swinging wide open to Dale head.

He approached, and called out, " hello...anyone in there!"

He stepped inside...

And he looked around him...the place sure smelt different...it LOOKED different...Declan having converted the house back to it's original state over the months.

Aaron dug his hands in his pockets, and smiled to himself, but it soon faded when his wandering eyes settled onto THAT WALL...the wall where he had thrown the death drink that day.

"WHAT are you doing in here!" came a voice behind him, Aaron swung around to see Declan standing in the doorway, " I...I...the door, it were open..." he stammered.

Declan came forward, " so you not interesting in living here then...NOT that you could afford it mind..."

Aaron pulled a face, his eyes darting to and fro from THAT WALL and back to Declan, "errrrr...I've...I'VE gotta go..." and he bolted out, Declan just raised his eyebrowes, and carried on with his business.

Outside, Aaron looked back at the house, then up toward the pub...again he was looking back...HE HAD TO STOP DOING THAT!...it was the present he had to concentrate on...

and the present...was Callum, not Jackson.

Xxx

" COME ON!...slap MORE of it on!" cried Jackson laughing, Joe went and slapped yet more of the cheap aftershave over Jackson's chest and neck, Hazel stepped into the bedroom, and lent up against the wall watching them...a scowl still upon her face.

Joe screwed the lid back on the bottle, as Jackson looked up at him, " I'm sorry about your date cancelling, mate...about the 5th time now...NOT that I counting mind" he said with a grin.

Joe smirked, " no...of course you're not...what about the hair...wanna bit of gel through it"

Jackson nodded, "go for it!", and Joe started rubbing in the gel through Jackson's curls, giving him the wet look.

"there you go...I think YOU are ready to go..." announced Joe, both of them staring into the full length mirror.

"where to, that's the big question..." Hazel muttered, beneath her breath, but Jackson's hearing was still sharp, as he glanced over to her " NEVER you mind!"

Hazel waved her arm in the air, as she walked out, " alright, BE like that...if you don't want me to know...that's up to you..."

Joe leaned in toward Jackson's ear, " tell her!...she just wants to know that you're gonna be safe..."

Jackson shook his head, " yeah I will...IF there's anything to tell...I may get there and he might've gone out...THIS ALL could be a waste of time, you know..."

Joe smiled at him, "well, good luck...your taxi should be here at 8...the movie is for the LAST showing..."

Jackson nodded...he felt nervous...what if Aaron wasn't there...what if he got ALL the way there, and it WAS a waste of time...he would feel like a laughing stock.

But he was worth it...if he was to be a laughing stock, it didn't matter...because Aaron was so worth all this bother...

Xxx

Aaron stepped out of the shower, and, with the towel around his waist, he made his way back to his bedroom, he instantly saw that his phone display was lit up...meaning he had received a text, he picked it up and read it with a sigh,

**soz, guna b L8..dad wants me on farm..probs..will b about an hour..C x**

Aaron throw the phone aside, and sighed out heavily...he laid back on his bed.

Typical...now he was going to be be kept waiting...didn't Callum know by now, for the length of time they had been together, just how much he hated that!

Xxx

As instructed by Jackson, the taxi had stopped off at the petrol station, and the driver went out to buy the flowers.

Jackson focused his limited gaze, first toward the pumps, then toward the direction of the garage shop...he could see the driver inside...he HAD the bunch of flowers in his grasp...but he was nattering on to the girl at the till, they were laughing now!

"come on, come on..." Jackson muttered in frustration.

The taxi driver was NOW leaning his elbow onto the counter, and the girl was acting all flirty, Jackson rolled his eyes, " come on!...stop talking to her you twat, get BACK here and drive this heap of shit!" he rambled to himself...

...but to his ever growing frustration...the driver was STILL talking...and she was still flirting...

Xxx

Aaron was looking into the mirror...his shirt was pressed...his jeans were tight...his hair was...non existant, due to shaving it again...because Callum liked it like that...

He sighed and looked at his watch as he sat on the bed...Callum was late, he said he would be an hour!

Aaron hated it when folk were late...HE could be late...that was him...but he didn't like folk being late for him.

He looked across to the NEW picture that was framed on his bedside unit...a one of him and Callum taken at Bar West...

He smiled loosely...before sighing again, what did Callum have planned for him tonight...he just hoped it wasn't going to be too soppy, he dreaded that...he just hoped Callum remembered the golden rule...keep it simple.

Xxx

Callum was beeping his horn at the tractor...the dark country lane was too narrow for him to over take in his sports car.

He now knew why folk beeped him...when HE was out in the tractor...

He glanced at the clock display near his stereo player...it was coming up to 9...he had promised Aaron he'll be an hour...and that was well and truely up...

"COME ON!" he shouted out the window, blasting his horn again.

Xxx

At the petrol station, the taxi driver was on his way back to the cab, Jackson snapped his head round from the back, " BOUT time!"

The driver threw over the bunch of flowers to him...they landed on his lap, Jackson looked down at them, " IS THAT ALL THAY HAD!" he gasped.

The flowers were half dead...and half in desperation of needing watering!

"stop your complaining, will yah...what do you expect for a fiver...now Emmerdale wasn't it...", he said looking into the rearview.

Jackson was shaking his head, " could have been THERE by now, if you weren't gassing to HER!", he glanced at the shop as the taxi pulled out from the pumps.

"ohhhh STOP yah moaning, will yah...why is it I always END UP with you on these runs..."

Jackson rolled his eyes, " the feelings mutual believe me...just get me there will yah..."

The driver was tutting...as he was focusing on the road ahead, " well, we won't be getting there anytime soon...looks like there's an accident up ahead..."

Jackson tried to look round, but it was differcult, " THAT'S ALL I need...pub'll be closed before I get there!"

Xxx

Callum parked his flash car up upon the forecourt of the Woolpack, and jumped out.

After giving it a flash of a grin, he made his way to the pub's entrance.

Inside, he headed straight to the bar...it wasn't busy...it was Monday night, Victoria was sat on a stool at the bar beaming a welcoming smile at him, " HE'S still upstairs" she told.

Callum raised his eyebrowes, " I'll get us in a drink...he'll be tarting himself up for me..."

Victoria pulled a doubtful look, " Aaron...tarting himself...you'll be lucky!"

Callum made himself comfortable on the stool next to her, " HE scrubs up pretty well actually...AS IF YOU haven't ever noticed..."

Victoria frowned at that, " well he never used to with me...", Callum laughed out loud, "well YOU are NOT me...are yah!"

Victoria liked Callum...but he did have a habit of being too over confident...he KNEW he was good looking...and fit...and the rest of it...but underneath all that, Callum could be quite self assured...he once said to her on a night out in the early days of his and Aaron's dating, 'that he'd GET Aaron'...and he had...he had him.

Callum looked up as Chas came to the bar, he beamed a winning smile at her, " alright Chas...looking gorgeous as ever I see...but then again, THAT'S where Aaron gets it from!"

Chas waved her hand at him, " ohhhh you ARE cheeky devil you, arn't yah... I can SEE why my Aaron is smitten with you..."

Chas pulled him his pint, Callum couldn't get the smirk off his face, " so...he's smitten is he...DOES Aaron DO smitten..."

A hand was then on his shoulder, " with the right guy...then yeah"

Callum turned his head...Aaron looked and smelled amazing, "and there's Victoria saying you don't DO tarting yourself up!"

Chas smiled to herself, Aaron did 'look' happy...but she knew deep down that her son wouldn't EVER be as smitten with anyone like he been with Jackson.

For a time, just before THAT DAY...Jackson was Aaron's world...Aaron the tough talking moody machanic...all love struck over a lad he had once punched, right in this pub.

That was smitten...

NO ONE could ever get away with dissing Aaron...there was always somekind of comeback...

but with Jackson...he could shout, moan, diss him to the cows came home...Aaron would NEVER come back at him...well within reason!

Jackson had been able to get away with a lot in Aaron's eyes...

Chas watched as her son and Callum had a laugh and joke together...Aaron was overtly happy...HE DIDN'T DO HAPPY...it was put on...

Aaron was just making sure Callum was happy...and everyone else for that matter, including herself.

Aaron was unhappy...she knew he was...she'd known for a long while now...those stares he goes into...the trances...his mind always in a different place or time.

She WANTED her son to be happy...

She liked Callum...she wanted him to LOVE Callum...but he didn't...

She felt selfish...wrong...she herself had once found herself in a loveless relationship...with Paddy.

Loveless was the wrong word...it was nice, comfortable...safe...but with NO passion, no spark.

She didn't want that for her boy...

Xxx

Although it was dark, Jackson knew they were nearing the village...and although he couldn't feel it...there were butterflies in his stomach.

"NEARLY THERE MATE!...BETTER LATE THAN NEVER!" came the taxi drivers call, Jackson rolled his eyes, he was glad they were nearly there...even IF Aaron HAD gone out...it'll be worth it to GET OUT of this vehicle and away from him!

In the pub, Callum slapped Aaron on the back, " so mate...you all fit..."

Aaron wasn't...he hated to think what Callum had planned, " alright..." he downed his pint, "lets go..."

Chas gave them a wave from the bar as they went out the doors, Paddy was then in front of her, " Aaron off out is he..."

"yeah...I HOPE he has a good time..." Chas told him.

"hope?...he's pretty taken with this lad isn't he..." asked Paddy with a frown.

Chas raised her eye browes at him, "yep!... that's what I think he's trying to get across..."

Xxx

Aaron jumped into Callum's car...

Callum was already inside and turning the key, he turned to him, " right...lets get this night on the road..."

Aaron turned his head, " So where are you taking me, nowhere too poncy, I hope"

Callum laughed, "You'll just have to wait and see, won't yah!" he teased, Aaron belted up, as Callum pulled the car on to the road, " alright, JUST go and promise one thing..."

Callum stared upon the road ahead, " what..."

"don't go spoiling it by getting ALL HEAVY on me...and be telling me, you love me...", Callum felt the prang in his stomach...but there was still time yet...he would just have to take this at a much slower pace.

The car had sped out of the village.

As Jackson's taxi was approaching ...as it pulled into the village, a little after...

And unknown to Jackson, and his simple plans...he was too late...

TBC...


	20. Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20/20

I DO NOT OWN EMMERDALE OR IT'S CHARACTERS...THEY ALL BELONG TO ITV1

A/N: ..Hi guys, final chapter!

Sorry for the wait, and thanks for those who have 'chased me' LOL, I think the end will disappoint some readers, but I hope not too much...xx

_**""On the 7th June, Aaron Livesy tried to assist his boyfriend to die...to give him that poisonous cocktail of drugs that would of brought an end to his life...**_

_**It had never happened...the drugs ended up being hurtled to the wall.**_

_**Ever since then...THAT moment... Aaron has tried to move on...but sometimes you can only pretend to be happy...pretend to enjoy your life...like Jackson Walsh did when he wanted to die.**_

_**Now it was Aaron's turn...to be unhappy deep down...making sure EVERYONE ELSE was happy...but himself**_

_**The time has come for Aaron to be true to himself""**_

Aaron jumped into Callum's car...

Callum was already inside and turning the key, he turned to him, " right...lets get this night on the road..."

Aaron turned his head, " So where are you taking me, nowhere too poncy, I hope"

Callum laughed, "You'll just have to wait and see, won't yah!" he teased, Aaron belted up, as Callum pulled the car on to the road, " alright, JUST go and promise one thing..."

Callum stared upon the road ahead, " what..."

"don't go spoiling it by getting ALL HEAVY on me...and be telling me, you love me...", Callum felt the prang in his stomach...but there was still time yet...he would just have to take this at a much slower pace.

The car had sped out of the village.

As Jackson's taxi was approaching ...as it pulled into the village, a little after...

And unknown to Jackson, and his simple plans...he was too late...

Xxx

Jackson rolled off the ramp outside the Woolpack, the driver came forward and nodded his head to the pub, " do you want me to help you inside, mate"

Jackson frowned at him, " no thanks!...I can see to meself, just make sure you stay out here till I get back..."

The driver leaned on the side of his cab, and lit up a ciggy, "anything you say ironside"

As Jackson wheeled off towards the pub, he called back, " haha..DON'T be giving up the day job, will yah"

Xxx

Inside the pub, Chas wiped down the bar, and was the first to see Jackson come wheeling in through the doors.

Pearl who was sitting nearby, was up in an instant, " Jackson Love!...THIS IS a surprize!" she cooed with a welcoming smile.

Chas bit her tongue, and tried to busy herself, WHY the hell was he doing here!

After ALL this time! Well he had missed Aaron, he had just gone out with his new fella, and boy, was she going to make that crystal clear to him.

Jackson looked across toward her, was she deliberately ignoring him, or had she not genuinely seen him.

Pearl leaned down to him, " so what brings you back to the village..." she was looking about her, "isn't yah Mum with you" she asked in surprize.

Jackson faced her, and knotted his eyebrowes together, " I'm NOT surgically tied to her you know...I DO have a life of me own!"

Pearl shook her head defending herself, " I'm only just saying love, I didn't mean owt by that"

Jackson smiled at her, " I know...", he again focused his gaze towards the bar, Victoria was then coming out from the back, she immediately sighted Jackson, and turned toward Chas, "have YOU seen who's here!"

Chas stuck her tongue in her cheek as she nodded at her, " yep!...It's a good job Aaron and Callum went out when they did...a few minutes longer and..."

Victoria shrugged, as she went back to her drink, " I'm not that sure about that Callum actually...there's cocky...and TOO cocky"

Jackson was forwarding to the bar...Chas looked up, she couldn't help herself, she leaned forward, glaring down to him, " I'm not being funny love...but you've got some nerve coming in here..."

Xxx

Meanwhile, Callum and Aaron never got far on route to the restraurant.

As Callum drove along the country lanes...his mobile had started ringing, so after pulling into a darkened layby, Callum took the call.

Callum turned to Aaron, as he pocketed the phone, " I am SO sorry about this...but it was me dad"

Aaron shook his head, and sighed, " WHAT now!...we are LATE enough as it is!"

Callum became all apologetic, " The sheep have all escaped the field, fense must be down...he can't round them up on his own..."

Aaron wasn't happy, " HE'S got your Mum hasn't he...and that farm hand", Callum shook his head, " he won't call him...it's easier to call me...look, you could help if you like...could be fun...AND we're get done quicker!"

Clearly Aaron wasn't impressed by that suggestion, " ARE YOU trying to be funny!...do you really expect ME to run round some stinking field rounding up Sheep...do you really think that's what I CALL having meself a good time, do you!"

Callum pulled a face in disbelief, " blimey!...talk about moody!...SMILE will yah...it won't take long...I promise...an hour tops...and we're be at that restraurant in no time..."

Aaron sighed...and was regretting his outburst, Callum was trying...he couldn't help his dad phoning him...

"alright...but an hour!...and then I go home" he relented.

Callum burst into a grin, as he started the engine, " great...you won't regret tonight, I promise..."

Xxx

Jackson was at Pearl's table, Chas had taken quite pleasure at letting him know that Aaron had gone out on a date with his new man.

A new man with a new Car...some flashy sports number...

And there was he thinking he could compete.

Talk about having NO chance.

Jackson managed to ignore Chas's evils, as he chatted to Pearl about nothing...he just spoke a bit about his new bungalow, and completing his on-line courses.

But his mind was never far from Aaron.

Pearl finished her white wine, as she could see Jackson staring at the wall...he was somewhere else...faraway, " love...I'm sorry about you and Aaron...he's erm, got a new friend now..."

Jackson, still staring at the wall, managed a half smile, " don't I know it Pearl...sounds flash with his set of wheels...compared to mine...", the last bit sounded resentful...to himself.

Pearl couldn't help it...she had been staring at the bunch of flowers sitting on Jackson's lap, since she clapped eyes on him, " love, I've got to ask..." she said, giving him another suck of his beer through his straw, " but who are the flowers for...I mean...Aaron doesn't strike me as a flowers type of lad..."

"They are not for him...", he turned to her, "...look do us a favour Pearl...get us another pint in, will yah..."

Xxx

Aaron waited in the car, Callum had drove them to his father's farm and left him to wait inside.

Of course Callum had offered that he could wait indoors, but Aaron was happier in the car...and he was adament about not chasing sheep around a muddy field.

Aaron pulled out his cigs, he was dying for a fag, he then placed one between his lips, and started to pat down his pockets, and cursed beneath his breath...he had forgotten his lighter.

In the darkness of the car, he patted around the seat area, and then around the back...he then turned the inside light on, and pulled open the glove compartment, because he could remember putting a spare in there a few days back.

He smiled at the sight of his spare lighter, but it faded when he saw the velvet box...

His heart raced...it was his biggest fear...

He snatched it up, and held it up infront of him...he just eyed it for a few seconds, before finally pulling it open.

A ring...

A ring...and that only could mean...

His hand reached for the door handle...

Xxx

Jackson was still at the Woolpack, when Paddy came back from checking on Rhona and baby Leo, he smiled at Chas, but she was making it plain obvious that she wasn't happy.

As he strided to the bar, he pulled a frown at her, " what's up..."

Chas nodded her head towards the corner, " are you BLIND paddy, have you seen whos in!"

Paddy looked across, and saw Jackson sitting with Pearl...and now joined by Betty.

"What's HE doing here...DOES Aaron know!"

Chas shook her head, " no...luckily he's still out with that new bloke of his...", Paddy watched Chas pull him a pint, and he paid her for it, after taking a much needed sup, he wiped his mouth with his hand, " do you want me to go over, and have a word..."

Chas shook her head in disbelief, " and say what Paddy!...you barred for sitting there...folk would want to know why, ask questions about..."

Paddy shushed her...he didn't want THAT business getting out either," don't be daft...look maybe he's here just here to see Pearl...", but even he thought that was doubtful...but he had to agree...he was glad Aaron was out...even though he thought as Chas did, that Aaron was giving them what they wanted...and was disregarding himself real happiness.

Xxx

Aaron had a long walk...it was 3 miles distance between Callum's dads farm, and the village

He sighed as he saw the pub...he felt bad about just running off...without even telling Callum...but he couldn't go through with it...he couldn't let Callum go and give him that ring and...

His thoughts were broken.

He saw the disabled Taxi parked outside the Woolie, with a bored driver sitting in the drivers seat reading a paper.

That could only mean...

Xxx

Jackson thought about going home.

That poor driver, and annoying, had been waiting for the best part of an hour now...that's if he hadn't just driven off already, and stranded him there.

He was about to let Pearl know, when the doors swung open, and Aaron entered the pub.

Paddy and Chas looked up from the bar...both shocked at seeing him back, he was supposed to be out for hours.

Aaron was already scanning the pub...it was alittle busier now, since leaving earlier with Callum.

There he was...

Jackson swallowed nervously, he saw Aaron approach him, hands in his pockets, " what are YOU doing here..." he asked, not really knowing what else to say.

Jackson forced a smile on his face, " just come to see my favourite ladies here" he answered,glancing toward Pearl and Betty.

Pearl waved her hand at him, and flapped her neck scarf " OHHHhhhh you big tease...he's here to see you!"

Jackson laughed it off, " don't be silly Pearl, I never said that! "

Pearl pulled a puzzled frown at him, " oh...but you JUST did, just now...I heard you"

"PEARL!" cried Jackson, his expression coming across between annoyed and embarrassed.

Aaron shook his head, taking in what she had said, " you what...", he came nearer, "...I mean...have you come all this way to see ME...", Aaron sounded genuinely surprized at this...and he even sounded impressed, his gaze then fell to the flowers sitting on Jackson's lap, he pulled a frown," are THEY for me!",

Jackson looked down to his lap, and blew out a laugh " what the flowers!...they are for your Mum you div!...to say sorry for how I treated you..."

Aaron met his gaze, as Jackson looked up at him, " will you give them to her...because I was sorta heading off...that's IF me taxis still out there..."

Aaron shook his head, "WHAT!...you going...why did you bother coming here for...just to GIVE me Mum flowers!"

Jackson looked to the floor, " no..."

Chas, dying for an excuse to know WHAT was being said, started to go around glass collecting...she hovered behind them, " Aaron...what ARE you doing back here love...you are supposed to be OUT with Callum"

Aaron looked around to her, " just leave it, Mum"

"No I WON'T just leave it!..." she said marching forward, " can YOU see what he's doing...he's just messing with your head again...like he did before"

Jackson nodded, defending himself, " no...I came here to ask you to come out with me...but you were out with Callum, so...so it doesn't matter...I'll just go, shall I..."

Chas smiled triampantly, " YES, you DO THAT love..."

Aaron was glued to the spot, as he watched Jackson wheel towards the doors...someone was opening them for him, Pearl frowned at Chas then looked up to Aaron, " go after him love..."

"stay out of this Pearl..." warned Chas, Pearl stood up and shook her head, " I don't know what's gone on between them too...I don't understand the ins and outs...but I know your son is fond of that boy..."

"YOU know nothing about WHAT'S gone on..."

Paddy was practically jumping on her words, " CHAS!...that's enough..."

Chas glared at Paddy, before focusing on her son...and on turning around...she realised that Aaron had gone.

Xxx

Aaron raced out the pub to see Jackson rolling towards the waiting taxi, " blimey...AT LAST!" the driver moaned, tossing aside his newspaper.

Jackson just pulled him a face, as Aaron came up to him, " JACKSON!...wait up will yah..."

Jackson forced his head back, and turned around the chair, " Aaron don't...I don't want any trouble..."

"NOR do I...but you can't JUST GO...you said you came to ask me to come out with yah, so why didn't yah..."

Jackson gazed at him, " because you were out with Callum...I just realised It were just a waste of time..."

Aaron folded his arms," ask me..."

Jackson snapped his eyes up, " what..."

"YOU heard!"

Jackson felt a little embarrassed now, especially with the taxi driver listening to every word.

Awkwardly, Jackson asked, " Come out with me..."

Aaron pretended to think about it...he even tapped his chin, then broke into a smile, "ohhhh GO ON then...seeing that youve come ALL this way on yah own...and me all dressed up, and NO where to go..."

Jackson was chuffed...and Aaron could tell by the look upon his face.

"so WHERE are you taking me...chippy?" asked Aaron, as he watched the ramp meet the ground.

Jackson lined his chair up, and rolled up, " Flicks actually...give us your hand and stick it inside my jacket pocket, will yah..."

Aaron was hesitate to get too close, but finally obliged...he pulled out two cinema tickets.

Aaron's eyes widened, as he read the title printed on them, " ZOMBIE DAWN!"

Jackson was chuffed again, he could see Aaron was well pleased, " how did you know!"

"nothing below an 18 for you!" Jackson told as the back door came up and closed him in.

Aaron rounded to the passenger door and jumped in...it was now or never...if he was going to do this, " well we better be getting our skates on then...it starts in an hour!" he turned to the driver, " when you're ready mate!"

"been ready for the last hour mate!" the driver moaned, and pulled out of the pub, and onto main street.

Chas and Paddy watched the taxi's tail lights disappear, as it left the village, Chas picked up the bunch of flowers that had ended up on the ground at her feet, and looked up to Paddy, "WE should have stopped him...shouldn't we...I mean...ohhhh Paddy I don't know what to do for the best!"

Paddy put his arm around her, " we've got to let them be Chas, WE'VE told Aaron how WE feel...but it's not about us is it...lets just let him work this through himself shall we...even IF it DOES end up the way we don't particularly want it to...at the end of the day...we can't let him pretend to be happy anymore...IT'S HIS LIFE..."

Chas sighed as she rested her head onto his shoulder, deep down she KNEW him to be right, she had known it for a while...it was just going to take time...

Xxx

The taxi had dropped Aaron and Jackson off outside the cinema's entrance.

Aaron stood on the curb watching as Jackson rolled off the ramp, the driver was faffing about with the hoist, " I can MANAGE from here mate..." Jackson told the driver.

The driver went to help anyway, but Aaron stepped forward, " you heard him...he said he can manage..."

Once Jackson was on the curb next to Aaron, they watched as the cab drove away.

Jackson looked upward to Aaron, his eyes smiling brightly at him, " you can ALWAYS to a runner NOW, you know", Aaron pulled a face, " why would I want to be doing that!", Jackson went forward towards the entrance, " Because this is where all the fun begins...you know, with dealing with me...getting me my popcorn and coke, then feeding it me...it's not to late to change your mind..."

Aaron followed him into the busy foyer, " don't be daft...so do you want some popcorn or what...", Jackson turned his chair around, and looked up at him, " DO YOU want any popcorn..."

Aaron shook his head smiling at him, " COURSE I do...YOU know I can't be seeing a flick without me popcorn..."

Jackson smiled back at him, he chinned towards his chest, " my inside pocket, you'll find me wallet...it's ME taking YOU out remember..."

Aaron waved his hand, " don't be soft, I can...", Jackson quickly butted in, knotting his eyebrowes together, " NO Aaron please!...I SAID IT'S MY TREAT, DIDN'T I!"

Aaron sighed, and slipped his hand inside Jackson's leather jacket, he could FEEL the eyes on him all around him, " blimey, I think folk think i'm robbing yah!"

Jackson blew out a sigh himself, " let 'em...go on, go get us that popcorn, and two cokes...and don't be taking too long over it"

Aaron took out a 20 from Jackson's wallet and instantly felt bad, he looked down to him troubled, " THIS feels wrong, taking money from your wallet..."

Jackson was shaking his head at him, " NO IT'S NOT!...IT'S MY TREAT! Please Aaron...please let it be me taking you out...it's important to me...", Aaron could detect a slight pleading tone there, and he certainly didn't want Jackson to feel like that.

He half smiled at him, " alright mate, BUT I'll be buying the pizza after..."

Jackson nodded, " if you like...go on, get the popcorn, otherwise we'll be late for the film, and I know how much you hate missing them trailers"

Aaron scooped up a carton of popcorn to share, and then went over to the counter and bought a large coke with two straws.

Aaron paid up, and then turned to see Jackson waiting near the ticket area, he approached and pulled a puzzled look, " what's going on..."

Jackson smiled at him, " waiting for you...COME ON, I'll show you one of the advantages of coming out with me..."

Xxx

Aaron and Jackson were sat at the back...there was a place at the front, for wheelchairs, but it would of resulted in giving them both a crooked neck by the time the end credits came up.

So the back was better...and they were behind everyone else...well most.

Aaron was impressed with his seat...the screen was in just the right eye line for him to view...

Jackson could see that he was pleased, he turned to face him, " see...didn't I tell you that I'd show you some of the advantages of coming out with me"

Aaron shrugged, " it's alright I suppose, I can see the benefits..", he then shoved the straw towards Jackson's mouth, and he took in some of the cola.

Jackson ended up coughing, Aaron was immediately, worried over him, " are you alright...are you...", Jackson was shaking his head with a smile, " I'm fine...it's just the bubbles went up me nose, that's all!"

Aaron sat back feeling silly about making to much of a fuss, Jackson smiled at him, "hey...talking of advantages...you can take advantage of me if you like...you know with US sitting in the back row like"

Aaron turned his head, and could see the cheeky look flashing up on Jackson's face, but because of his delayed reaction, Jackson quickly looked away, telling him, " sorry, I'm an idiot...I don't know what I'm saying..."

The lights had dimmed, and the trailers had started to roll on the screen, Jackson closed his eyes, he felt like a right prat saying that, OF COURSE Aaron wouldn't take advantage of him...he'd rather be out at that flash restraurant with that boyfriend of his, than sitting here seeing some daft horror flick with him.

Aaron swallowed as he faced out ahead to the big screen, then slowly moved his hand, and placed it on Jackson's thigh, of course Jackson didn't notice at first, because he couldn't feel him, but when he glanced down to see if the carton of popcorn was still there...he saw it.

He slowly turned his head toward Aaron, the lad turned his own head very slightly, but his eyes were still fixed to the screen, " just in case tou get scared..." he whispered.

Xxx

Aaron and Jackson came out into the cold, October air, " I TOLD you that you might get scared..." laughed Aaron.

Jackson protested, " I WASN'T scared, I were JUST pretending to be..." he told, but Aaron still wasn't convinced.

Aaron had enjoyed the film, Jackson seemed to always know what films he REALLY liked to go and see.

Jackson wheeled to the curb and waited, as Aaron took a step behind and looked at his phone.

Jackson turned his head, and smiled sadly, " IS that HIM again...why don't you just call him, tell him you are sorry about running out on him..."

Jackson turned his chair to face him, " you did that to me a few times in the past...I always forgave you, didn't I"

Aaron stared at Callum's text on his phones display, the cold making him shiver,

**Aaron wot have I done...call me...where R you...call me!**

Aaron pocketed the phone, and looked up to him, " I WITH you tonight now...so lets not spoil it..."

Jackson blew out a laugh, " spoil what!...we are just two mates out seeing a crap movie together...lets not make anything of it, HE might and it's not fair..."

Aaron waved his arm out to him, " WHAT'S got into you now!...we were just having ourselves a laugh just now, what's changed..."

Jackson swallowed down, and looked away, " just call the cab will yah..."

Aaron was getting tearful, " but I can't understand what I've done...I was happy in there...with you...and I'm mean happy...I didn't have to pretend anymore..." a tear rolled down his cheek as the emotion took hold, " OHHHH BOLLIX to YAH!..." he shouted shaking, and stormed off up the walkway toward the carpark.

Jackson watched him go, he panicked, his face screwed up with emotion too, so he called out, " I LOVE YAH!"

Aaron stopped in his tracked and wiped his tear drenched face with his sleeve, and turned around to face him.

Jackson was aware his declaration had drawn attention to him, but he didn't care...he wheeled toward him, " I do...I've ALWAYS have done...it's just..."

Aaron sniffed, his nose was running, " just what...JUST spit it out!"

"YOU!...you've moved on...you've seen what it's like to be with a active FIT man, I can't compete with that...I've tried but...it's no use is it...not now you've got a taste fot it", Jackson's gaze then hit the ground, as the realisation of his own words hit him.

Aaron swallowed, " do you really think I LOVE Callum...I don't...I don't love him...I love you...I always love you...I'm sick of pretending"

He watched as Aaron went down on one knee and placed his hands onto Jackson's knees, "I THINK about you ALL the time...I miss you...I chased after you that day you left the village...my heart hurt so much I thought I was going to choke"

Jackson now had a tear rolling down his own cheek, as Aaron continued, " that day, the day I nearly poured that drink down your neck, I would have done that...if you wanted it...I've told you that before and it's true...even if I had rotted in prison for the rest of me life...I would never of regretted it..."

Jackson shook his head tearfully, " I know..."

Aaron pulled himself together, he didn't know whether he was shaking with the cold or emotion, " look...what do you want...do you want us to get back together..."

"Aaron I..."

"IT'S A SIMPLE enough question Jackson!...DO YOU WANT ME OR NOT!" he shouted.

Jackson shook his head, " Course I do!...but it's not that easy is it, there's MY Mum, YOUR Mum and Paddy to consider..."

Aaron shook his head, " I don't care about that Jackson, It's US I'm concerned about, not them...IF we make a go of it...a REAL go...then it has to be the real thing...I...I mean a whole relationship..."

Jackson stared into his eyes, " But I..."

Aaron rolled his eyes, " Jackson you MUST OF googled it...all we need is a room to ourselves, and folk to leave us be for a few hours to find out what we can and can't to..." he half smiled, " and have some fun finding out..."

Jackson smiled too...

and he wanted to jump in before Aaron, " come back with me...to my bed...not anything heavy...just for a cuddle...but only if you want to..."

He had said it now...there was no turning back...but Aaron smiled back at him, pulling out his phone again, " I'll hurry the taxi along shall I...I'd like that...we can talk all night like we used to..."

"and worry about everyone else...in the morning!", and that did meant facing Hazel, Chas, Paddy and Callum.

Aaron smiled, as they met eachothers gaze again...but this time it wasn't awkward...it felt right, and by instinct Jackson managed to lean in and met Aaron, as they kissed on the lips...it didn't linger long...but it had sealed what had been decided in both of their aching hearts...

Whether it was just for now, or forever...to be together.

Both knowing there are NO garantees for a happy ever after...

Xxx

END

**I hope I didn't disappoint too much, let us know what you thought about it. Reviews and opinions all welcomed...x**


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